Zindagi Bhar Ki Maut

Sach Ka Aaina

After Pooja without wasting a second Bondita rushed to the room and jumped on the bed and started crying hard.

"Kyun, kyun nhi bhul paati mai wo sab,kyun, aakhir kyun? Itne saal ho gye par aaj v 1-1 cheez yaad hau. Mai nhi chahti unhe taklif dena par jab ye sab dekhti hoon apne aap wo zakhm hare ho jate hai aur nhi chahte huye v sab kar deti hoon mai. Aur fir taklif pahuchti hai mujhe unhe taklif dekar.

Aaj v unke aansoo mere dil ko chot pahuchaate hai, mai chahti hoon wo khush rahe par kya ho jata hai mujhe.

Bas ab aur kuch din mai yaha se door chali jaungi, mai akele hi ghutti rahungi, marte rahungi, kam se kam dusro ko taklif pahuchana nhi padega nah" She said sobbing and coveres her face with her hands.

Anirudh too followed her this time when she left, he felt that he need to confront her, he knew how much devastated she is because he knew from the very first time how much it will cost her but still he chose to do this to her.

He entered the room as the door was open and found her crying hard, he himself was crying in guilt and shame when he heard the last lines of hers.

"Bon....di ..ta.."

She turned towards him and looked at him. Ani could feel the rage and immense pain in her eyes.

"Dekho Bondita, mai jaanta hoon meri galtiyan maafi ke laayak nhi hai par mai fir v tumse maafi maangunga aur ek baar nhi baar baar maangunga jab tak tum mujhe maaf nhi kar deti.

(He sat on his knees and joined hands)

Mai gunehgaar hoon tumhara Bondita maaf kar do mujhe tum jo saza dena chaho sweekar hai mujhe, par aise khud ko mat sazaa do tum.

Dugga Maa Sakshi hai Bondita maine jo kiya tumhare bhale ke liye kiya,us waqt yehi ek raasta tha mere paas."
She didn't want to taunt or hurt him again but his justification instigated her again

"Bhala? Mera Bhala? (She let out a sarcastic laugh) Haan bahut bhala socha aapne par mera nhi apna.

Aapko ek ham umra patni ki jarurat thi jise apni patni batane me aapko sharm na mahsoos ho, jo khoobsurat ho aur sabse jyada jo aapki patni bn sake, aapki sabhi zaruraton khaskar ........ shaa...shaareerik jaruraton ko pura kar sake." she said in grief.

"Bondita...." He yelled at top of his lungs.

"Chillane se sach to nhi badal jaata nah Barrister Babu tab sayad mai choti thi par ab nhi nah.

Afsos hai ki ab mujhe wo sare Palo ka matalab samajh aata hai jo aapne Manorama Ji ke sath bitayi, sath me khana khana, ek kamre me sath rahna, unse pyaar bhari baatein karna, sirf unhi ke haathon se coffee peena, unke sath hasna khush rehna, ab samajh aata hai sab.. sab kuch....

Kash mai kabhi badi na hoti, kash mai kabhi samajh hi na paati in chizon ko. Kash mai wahi nanhi si Bondita hoti jise ye lagta tha ki jarur uske Patibabu ko koi galatfahmi huyi hai tabhi unhone Manorama Ji se vivaah kiya, jise ye lagta uske Patibabu ke liye wo sabse zyada ahem hai, use hi sabse jyada pyaar karte hai wo, kisi aur ko Bondita ki jagah nhi denge

Par meri aankhon ke saamne meri saari chizein,mere sare adhikar dhire dhire Manorama Ji ko diye gye par mujhe jyada farq nhi pada tab kyunki meri sabse pehli anmol cheez to unki shadi ke pehle din hi unki ho gyi thi.

Kash us nanhi si masoom si Bondita ke sare bhram na tootte, kash mujhe is zindagi ki sabse kadwi sachai ka saamna na karna padta.

Pata hai mai pehle har roz Dugga Maa se kehti thi har ladki ko mere jaisa pati mile par mai prarthana karti hoon Dugga Maa se kisi ko mere jaisa pati na mile.

Mai Dugga Maa se prarthna karti hoon ki Anirudh Roy Chowdhury jaise insaan kisi ko pati ke roop me na mile, bhale hi dost, shikshak ho par pati aapke jaisa kabhi nhi hona chahiy khaskar agar patni ke kismat me Bondita bnna ho, agar Manorama bnne mile fir v thik hai." She said all these and was a bit relieved after releasing all the pain buried inside her for past ten years.

ARC moved back with a jerk and started crying more.

"Sahi kehti ho tum Bondita, mai kisi ka pati bnne ke laayak nhi. Tumhare sare shabd, saare ilzaam sahi hai sivaay ek ke......( he stepped towards her and grabbed her by her shoulders)

Kya tumhe sach me lagta hai Bondita maine sirf sharirik sukh ke liye Manorama se shadi ki? Apne dil pe haath rakh ke batao Bondita kya tumhara dil ye maanta hai ki tumhare patib.....tumhare Birristera Babu aise kar sakte hai?" he said being disgusted at his own self.

Bondita jerked his hands from her shoulder, "Dil to nhi kehta par dimaag to yahi kehta hai nah. Aap hamesha yahi kehte the nah Barrister Babu ek Barrister ko hamesha dimaag ka istemal karna chahiye. Saboot ke aadhar par faisla lena chahiye aur saboot mila mujhe ek aapki diary jo aapke jazbaat bayan kar rahi thi aur wo gaal laal hona kisi ke khyaal me wo Manorama Ji hi thi nah, us saalgirah ke utsav me aapka Manorama Ji se us tarah pesh aana, achanak unke samne hamare rishte se ghinna aana kyunki wahi Tulsipur me nyi thi, baki pure Tulsipur ko hamara rishta pata tha aur isse pehle aapko ghinna v nhi aayi thi na is swaang ke baare me bataya h aur v na jane kitni aisi chizein jo yahi saabit karti hai mere sare ilzaam sahi hai."

"Par Bondita tum hi kehti thi nah dil aur dimaag ki jung me dil ki sunni chahiye, kaise sare saboot aur log Kaka ke virudh the par fir v tumne dil ki suni aur Kaka ka sath diya aur wahi sach hua. Fir aaj kyun?..." Anirudh said.

"Aaj kyun? Ye aap mujhse pooch rahe hai? Kyunki aapne mujhe ehsaas dilaya ki is dil ki, iski bhaavnao ki koi ahemiyat nahi Barrister Babu." She cut him off.

Ani didn't know how to react after this, he was facing the results of his own deeds and decisions. Bondita was standing with a mirror to make him come out of his lala land which Manorama made for him by suppoting and praising his wrong moves.

Ani wasn't able to recognise his own self and own actions's reflection. He just collapsed there on ground and crying out loud.

"Ab mai tumhe kaise samjhaun aur kaise yakeen dilaun Bondita, kaise?" He said to himself Bon already left the room without even looking at him after saying her last line.