You can't break up with a soul mate [a love story in poetic verse]

170 | walking to the beach

the sun was bright as the star it is

the air was hot as Greece could be

the iced coffee I was drinking was waking me up

everyone I have ever loved has left me

except Jared. he would have been loving me

his way for as long as he wanted

i suppose he loved me in his limited way

i felt as if he really did have more walls than i did

i was more transparent

he kept evading every question

with silence or hoping i would forget

and i did. i kept forgetting but honestly

i never did. it was always lurking

in the dark.

i can't justify his reasons

in the end

i am the one i have to take care of

not him or anyone else.

It's my heart

that needs to flourish

to love

to be loved in all the ways it needs

and wants

not for fifteen minutes or an hour

but for my entire lifetime

i kept walking without even looking at my phone

i kept thinking that even though

it was over between Jared and me

in a technical term

it would take months or years

for me to truly get over

this bond we had

this unhealthy connection

i knew that more than ever

sex was not the answer either

an orgasm was not the answer

words were not the answer

this walk is the answer

time and distance

being by myself

and in this moment

is the only answer I need

I reached the beach

I was about to text the girls

but I decided to not look at my phone

I would walk around and find them

nothing else to do

but be in the moment.

Jared could not reach me now

never

he was out of my life

and I truly felt at peace

with that

not tortured or in love

or thinking of the past.

I found them and jumped in front of them

they sat up from the lawn chairs

Hey, Dalia! Finally
we lost you last night!
Where did you go?

I was with Thanos!
Why didn't you tell me he was so spiritual?

Oh, yeah, he is such a sweetheart. Sophia said.
You will eat him alive. Be careful. He is super
sensitive, although he looks as if he's not.

I am not interested in him like that. We were talking as friends. He was giving me spiritual advice. We spoke all night long. I even had breakfast at his place.

They both looked at each other and grinned.

Thanos is too good for anyone. Just don't break his heart.

That is not happening. I am going to visit his wellness centre.

Sophia's phone pinged.

She looked down and smiled.

It's Thanos. He wants to know where we are
and if you are with us. She looked right at me.

Cool, I said. We have so much to talk about.

Eleni laughed, That's how it starts.