Ten Blade

8.02

"Alright, guys, you also start teaching skills labs today." April told them. "I made up a schedule for the months, it's up in my office."

"In your what?" Meredith asked, as everyone but Helena seemed surprised.

"Chief Resident gets an office." She told them, nodding.

"Oh, we get an office!" Cristina let out, excitedly.

"We don't, I do." The redhead answered.

——

As Helena scrubbed in for her surgery, Arizona entered the scrub room with a smile, asking her. "A solo fifth year surgery. Are you nervous?"

"Depends on who's asking, my attending or my friend." Helena told her, smiling at the blond.

"Huh, attending?" The blond furrowed her brows.

"Then I am confident that I'm ready to preform the surgery, Dr. Robbins." Helena told her, continuing to scrub.

"And as a friend?" The blond tilted her head.

"A little bit. I mean, I know that I can do this, it's just... it's different, since I've had Alice." Helena sighed, looking at the sink as she scrubbed. "I mean, you have a baby and you worry so much about screwing them up, like every single little thing you say or do might change them up forever. And when you're holding the scalpel, well, you have the power to truly change a life. And I knew that before, I did, but now, as a parent, it's different. Like I can almost see the consequences of my actions right before my eyes."

"I know what you mean." Arizona nodded. "I sometimes do that too, since Sofia. I just start thinking that we get to determine the full course of the kid's life, if they'll ever get married, the job they might have... but then I realize I'm thinking as a parent."

"And we need to thing as surgeons, in the OR." The brunette concluded, as the attending made a noise of agreement. "Alright, I'm ready." She told her, entering the OR, with her hands properly scrubbed.

"Can you gown me? Please and thank you." Helena asked the nurses, putting on her gloves as well, before approaching the surgical table, where the baby was knocked out.

Behind her, Arizona sat in a bench, opening up a magazine, confident in her residents ability.

"Ten blade, please." Helena requested, extending her hand where the scrub nurse placed the scalpel.

The girl closed her eyes for a second, taking a deep breath, before opening her eyes again. There was a newfound calm, a newfound confidence, when she did, one that always washed over her when she got to preform solo surgeries.

"Alright, people, let's change a life."

——

Season 8, episode 4

"I'm gonna miss you so much, pequenina." Helena covered her baby with kisses, as Mark held her.

"It's a 48 hour shift, honey, we're gonna be fine." Mark told her, chuckling.

"Well, yeah, but I haven't had such a long one since I had this little bean." The woman spoke in her baby voice as she looked at the blue eyes of her daughter.