Nineteen

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Demi

I hated that Odell seemed to be avoiding me all week. I hated that we were no longer talking. I hate myself for saying what I did. I wish I had just kept my mouth shut. If I had, we wouldn't be in this mess, we would still be friends who make-out occasionally. I don't know what we are and I don't know what I want us to be. Maybe the break from each other was good. The break helped me to realise the feelings I have for him. I can't let him go. I don't want to let him go. We need to be something even if that something is just friends.

Riss💞: You ready for your boo? 😜

I rolled my eyes at the message that pinged through but it didn't stop my heart from racing and my cheeks from blushing. I love that Marissa, my best friend, the only person I can really count on in this world, is so excited for me and pushing so hard for me to admit my feelings for Odell.

Me: 🙄🙄

Riss💞: 😂😂😂

I released a breath as I tried to relax back against the couch, my eyes dancing to the tv that was playing quietly. I'm not even sure what I'm watching. I can't concentrate on anything other than Odell and what I'm going to admit to him.

Are you really ready, Demetria?

I didn't have the chance to answer that question as a knock sounded on the front door. I pulled from my thoughts and released a breath, trying to calm down the sudden rapid thumping of my heart in my chest. The way that I'm feeling is a way I've never felt before. I pushed myself up from the couch and headed for the front door, playing with my fingers to try and stop my hands from shaking. What if he doesn't want me anymore? What if I really ruined my chances with him? Another knock sounded on the door and I suddenly felt myself blushing as I realised I hadn't yet opened it. How long have I been standing in front of the door for? I reached out with a shaky hand and twisted the handle. I quickly released a breath as I pulled it open and my heart skipped a beat at Odell who stood on my porch.

"Hi" he looks so fucking handsome.

"Hi" I bit down on my lower lip, glancing down at the floor before I pulled open the door further and stepped out of the way. He stepped into the house, holding a plastic bag out to me. "I brought some goodies" I glanced up to meet his gaze and took the bag from him, smiling at the candy and chocolate inside.

"You know me too well" he lightly laughed. I lightly pushed the door to a close and then turned my attention to Odell. "You want anything to drink?"

"Just a water's fine" I nodded and began into the kitchen with Odell following behind me. "I don't mean to bring it up, but have you heard anything from your dad?"

"He's messaged" I pulled two glasses from the cupboard. "I-He basically just asked how I was. I told him that I was fine even though it was a little of a lie" I mumbled the last part of the sentence as I filled the glasses with water. "He doesn't care about me but at least he's trying, I suppose" I shrugged, turning back to Odell. I handed him one of the glasses and flashed him a smile. "Anyway, less talk about my dad, how have you been?"

"I've been alright. I've missed you though" I felt my cheeks heating up, my lips twitching at the corners.

"I've missed you too and I really am sorry for what I said. I'm sorry that I hurt you. I-I didn't mean any of it, honestly" my eyes glanced up to lock with his. A silence settled around us as we just stared intently at each other. "I-I like you too" my heart skipped a beat at the smile that spread across his face. "I was stupid to even try and deny it. For a minute, all I cared about was high school and popularity. I didn't care about the future or my actual happiness, until I met you. Can we start again?"

"No" my eyebrows creased. "Why don't we just carry on from where we left off?"

"And where would that be exactly?" my heart began to hammer harder against my chest as Odell walked slowly around the counter. My tongue came out to lick my lower lip and my stomach suddenly filled with butterflies. His eyes remained locked with mine as he ran his hand delicately along my waist and pulled me into him. His other hand settled on my neck, his thumb delicately stroking along my cheek.

"Do you know what my favourite thing about you is?"

"What?"

"Your freckles" I rolled my eyes as he lightly laughed but I could feel my cheeks heating up. He leant into me and delicately pressed his forehead to mine. My eyes fluttered closed and my entire body tingled at the way his breath danced along my lips. "And I like the way kissing you makes me feel."

"You sound like a girl, Odell" he lightly chuckled. "Are you going to kiss me or what?" I felt his lips twitch up into a smile as he leant further into me and pressed his lips to mine. I ran my hands along his waist and fisted his shirt. I liked the way kissing him made me feel too because it helped to make me feel alive. The touch made my entire body tingle. His tongue lightly danced along my lower lip and I instantly granted him access. The butterflies in my tummy just grew as our tongues fought for dominance. I ran my fingers up his chest, along his neck and then into his hair. He pushed me back against the counter as we continued to kiss, enjoying the euphoria that it caused.

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