Girls Und Panzer Tankery's End

Chapter 39

"I didn't want a life lush with money If I couldn't be with the one I loved! You just had to interfere and install all that fear into my heart! The fear of not being able to give a good life to my daughters, the fear of being kicked out by him for taking up space in his life, and the fear having to come to you in shambles begging to be allowed a place to stay! It was all you!" Shiho yelled again. There was no answer from her mother, only the faint sound her breathing. Only after a minute was there an answer.

"I've always wanted you to live the life any Nishizumi deserved. A luxurious life. One that you have at home. Without that washed up imbecile of a man." Shiho's mother said.

"Yet my children hate me. At least trying to patch things up with Tsuneo has let some light shine into my life recently." Shiho said.

"That's the thing. You left him, and now your crawling back to him. You feel like you've lost everything. Your father died six years ago, you want nothing to do with me, and you sent your children off to whats practically a war to satisfy your own meager ends involving Sensha Do. You feel like you've no one that loves you anymore, that's why your talking to him again." Her mother spat.

"No! Your wrong!" Shiho yelled.

"You want to feel his love for you again just to have the feeling back. you don't care for him, you never have." Her mother continued.

"Stop it." Shiho pleaded. She wanted to throw the phone away. the divulge herself from the words of the witch that ruined her happy life. Yet she couldn't. Shiho felt as if waves were dragging her down underneath of thick sea of loneliness. No matter how hard she swam she only saw the surface getting farther and farther away. never would she again reach the top.

The words of her mother echoing in her ear. 'A Nishizumi never quits' 'A Nishizumi never takes a defeat' 'A Nishizumi never loves someone less then them'. these words felt as if Shiho was being stabbed again and again. A void of muffled silence encroached onto her, filling her surroundings with nothing but darkness, coldness, and deafness.

"Your just using him to satisfy your own needs. Your needs to be rid of me, to have children, and to fell relevant." Her mother spat again. Shiho slumped back into her chair, eyes dilated and devoid of sense and reason, her body felt cold and docile, immobile even. What reason was there to understand? Her mother was right. She was always right. Shiho never loved Tsuneo, she never cared what her children thought of her, if they could win in Sensha Do and bring pride to the Nishizumi name and live a life they deserved then what did she care what they thought? It doesn't matter. It never did. Nothing matters except upholding her mothers will. Her mothers teachings. The same teachings she gave to her daughters. Nothing else mattered.

Warmth? That was the thought that emerged through Shiho's mind. Where could such a warmth come from? Where was it? How could she get more of it? Questions plagued Shiho's mind as she scurried around her mind to find the source of the warmth that gave her such a blissful feeling. Where was it? How can she get more? Why her? how can something so filled with light and love choose her? why?

Shiho's eyes regained focus. She still felt cold and stiff bit she could see again. She saw the surface of the thick dark ocean around her close in on her. emerging from the water she felt a deep breath fill her lungs like she never felt this before. How wrong she was. She had felt this before, and only one person had ever given her the chance to do so.

Shiho glanced to her right and her eyes widened. She had forgotten he was even here. He had gone to the relieve himself in the bathroom earlier. His black hair waved, and brown eyes pierced into her soul. Tsuneo glanced down at her, his face full of worry. He hand clasped onto her shoulder and his sounded like a preaching of hope and safety.