Unwanted Flatmate

Confidante

Alyssa

I sit on the ridiculously expensive couch my soon to be brother in law has in his ridiculously expensive apartment. Alli told me of their planning to move to a bigger apartment once the renovation in the new place is done. Seriously this one is already big enough, that one is huge. I've been there once with Alli. Sometimes I think Zac is a little bit crazy, especially when it comes to my sister.

My sister comes with 2 glasses of red, full to the brim. She gives me one and sits next to me. I murmur my thanks to her.

"By the way, is it okay for me to crush your Saturday evening with your fiancé?" I ask. I feel bad since they should enjoy their weekend.

She chuckles. "First, you're already here, Lys. Second, he loves you and you know it," she says.

Zac must know that I'm so fucked up that he is willing to share his fiancé with me. My brother in law is super overprotective with my sister. Like he always wants to spend every second, every minute, every hour with Alli. I could understand that since they lost 10 years because of a stupid devil.

Allison shrugs and drinks her wine. "What about you? You looked.. terrible," she says. Terrible is the friendly term of 'you looked like a rat who just fell into a dumpster.'

I gulp my wine and sigh. "Everything went south," I say.

"Because.." Alli leaves me to complete it.

"Because I'm a stupid bitch." I sigh.

She chuckles softly. "What did you do, Lys?"

"I did nothing. Literally nothing. I did nothing to tell him that the lease of this apartment expired. I did nothing to let him know that I'm looking for a single bedroom apartment. He found out when he borrowed my computer."

"And he's mad at you?"

I nod miserably. I feel my eyes hot.

"Then why did you do nothing when you know for sure you have to do something with it?"

"I..." I sigh. If there is one I can trust with all my stupid and dark secret, it's my sister. Not that I have any dark secret. My life is pale compared to the Goldreich family. But I like my pale, simple life more than their crazy drama.

"It's.. I didn't tell Dave because I thought.. by the time the lease expired, we already..." I look at my sister.

She sighs. "You think by that time you already broke up with him so there is no need for you to inform him?" She squeezes my hand and says, "I told you stop being a paranoid girlfriend, Lys."

"I know.. but I can't help it. I can't bring myself to tell him.."

"I thought you love him," she says.

"I do.. I love him, Alli. But I also cannot say it to him. I don't know why. One day there was a woman in his office that I know very clearly the woman had another agenda with Dave. I can't even bring myself to ask Dave because I'm afraid he thinks of me as a clingy and overprotective girlfriend," I say.

"Why would he think like that? No.. most importantly why you could think like that? I thought you had a normal relationship with Aaron. He didn't make you like this, right?"

"No.. my relationship with Aaron was normal just like with any other boyfriend before him. It.. maybe because I hope I can have this with Dave forever, I feel like I can't demand too much from him so he would never feel me less.. God, Alli I'm so fucked up," I say desperately.

She nods. "Very. You love him yet you showed him that you don't really love him. You want a forever yet you assume that everything will be over in less than a year."