Unwanted Flatmate

Dave Walker

Yes, that's my name! David Ferdinand Walker is my full name. I'm the CEO at Walker Baby Production. We're not making babies, okay. We're making baby food products. My parents are the founder of this company.

My big sister Diana Ross Walker (yep, my mom is a huge fan of Diana Ross) and her husband, Marcus James Walker, are the head of our R&D. Both of them are freak scientists. Marcus is an orphanage. He lost his parents when he was a baby. My parents took him in our family because back then mom had difficulty conceiving. A year after she adopted Marcus, she became pregnant with my sister and 8 years later she became pregnant with me. So since I was a baby I already know that Marcus is my brother (in law). At the age of 17 he said he wants to change his name. Mom put Walker as his middle name, but Marcus asked my parents permission so he can change it to his last name, and his original last name, James, became his middle name. And, of course, my parents happily agreed with that. After all, Marcus is their son.

My parents are resigned and live in Hawaii contentedly to spend the rest of their lives. They visit us whenever they miss us, I mean whenever they miss their grandchildren. I have 2 teen nieces, Rosalind and Rita Levi, yes both are scientists' names.

As for me, I haven't found a great woman to spend my forever with.. I'm still trying to find a woman that will not make me bored for more than a month. That is sassy enough to answer me, hot enough to make me go to bed every night thinking of her, smart enough to make me awe with her work.. it's not too hard, right? Every man wants to find their best woman.

It just... maybe my time hasn't come yet.

"You still want to break up with me?" Corinne asks in disbelief with her high tone.

I take my boxer and wear it. "I told you Corinne. I don't think it will work between us" I'm bored with you.

"But we just had the most earth shattering sex just now!" She says.

I rake my hair. It's earth shattering for you, but not for me. I was an asshole to think about another woman to make me hard and climax. And you said for the sake of the last time so I agreed to have the last sex with you.

"Look Corinne, you are a nice woman. Any man will be lucky to have you, but that man is just not me." You were a clingy girlfriend who kept asking me to send you a live picture every hour that I need to turn off my phone.

"But I just want you, baby. Look last night I'm dreaming of our wedding. It would be awesome," she says, hugging me with her naked body. Jesus Christ. We were together less than a month and you already dreamed of the wedding?!

I push her gently "sorry Corrine," I say looking for my pants.

She stands up abruptly and pushes me to the door.

"Wait Corrine, my clothes—"

"Fuck you Dave!" She pushes me out of the door and slams the door right on my face.

I try to open but cannot. "Corrine, my clothes!"

"Fuck you Dave! I'll throw your stuff from the windows!"

"What the fuck?" And I know better than to think she is kidding. This crazy woman is going to throw my clothes, for sure. I climb down the stairs. Her apartment is a 3 story brownstone and her unit is on the third floor.

I just emerged from the brownstone when I see my pants and shoes flying down to the ground.

For fuck's sake!

I run and take it. Wear it as fast as possible. It's fucking November in New York. "Corinne, come—" I just look up when my shirt drops on my face. I take it and am ready to shout at my crazy ex when I see my laptop flying right in front of me and... crack!