Desire | SOPE ✔️

43

But that sudden rush of happiness went down the drain as quickly as it came once he saw a certain man walk towards him, eyes catching his in an almost demanding manner.    

His heart picked up speed once their eyes met. It was like everything around him suddenly disappeared making them the only people left on the earth. 

His deep brown eyes held his gaze, his expression determined as he walked towards Yoongi with the same dominating energy as always surrounding him as he carried himself with such confidence it made every person turn their heads when he walked by them.

Hoseok. 

The name that had been playing on repeat in his mind every day. Everything that had happened had just confirmed Yoongi's feelings for him and it drove him insane. He didn't want to feel this way about Hoseok, not after what he did to him, but he couldn't help it. 

He was completely and utterly in love with him and he didn't know how to drown those feelings.

Taehyung had noticed the way Yoongi had stopped walking, and when he looked in the same direction as him, his blood boiled up once he saw who was approaching them. He pulled Jimin's sleeve to get his attention, and also he felt his anger rise in his stomach once he saw Hoseok. 

"Yoongi, let's go get some food." Taehyung tried pulling him away, but it was like he was in a trance, under Hoseok's spell or command. 

Hoseok was then in front of Yoongi, looking down at him with eyes filled with a thousand emotions. Hoseok's breath almost got caught in his throat at the sight of the male in front of him. He was no longer blonde, he now had completely black hair, giving him a whole different look. But he still looked as beautiful as ever in Hoseok's eyes and all he wanted to do was reach out and touch his face, tell him how much he truly loved him and how sorry he was for all he's done. 

"Can I speak with you please?" Hoseok pleaded. Yoongi almost couldn't speak, the surprise of having Hoseok standing right there in front of him making his mind go blank. He had missed him. He had missed him so much. 

"I don't think you have the right to do that." Taehyung cut in, snapping both males out of their intense trance. Hoseok almost rolled his eyes, but he understood why Taehyung reacted that way. If Yoongi had told his best friends anything near the truth, he could understand why they were acting defensive. 

"Yoongi please. Just let me explain and then I'll leave you alone. I promise." Hoseok pleaded, eyes still on the ravenette male in front of him. He couldn't read his face, he was completely expressionless. 

"Hyung, let's go to Jin-hyung's restaurant." Jimin was now the one speaking, desperate to get his best friend out of what he thought was an uncomfortable situation. 

But Yoongi didn't feel uncomfortable at all. He felt static, like Hoseok was pulling him in and telling him everything would be alright without even using words.  

"I'll be fine guys. I want an explanation, I need closure." Yoongi now broke he and Hoseok's gaze, looking over at his best friends with a small reassuring smile. They didn't look convinced, but they nodded anyways. 

"Is that a yes?" Hoseok asked, eyes searching Yoongi's for any readable emotions. 

"Y-yeah. Let's go to my apartment, it's close by." Yoongi said looking down at the ground. He felt weak doing this, like he was crawling back to Hoseok but he knew he needed this. He needed an explanation as of why Hoseok did what he did. 

The two walked in silence all the way to Yoongi's apartment that he hadn't lived in for the whole month. It wasn't an uncomfortable or awkward silence, they were both just collecting their minds and preparing for whatever was going to happen next. 

Yoongi unlocked the door and walked inside with a limp. He took off his jacket and crossed his arms at Hoseok. 

"If you have anything to say, I think you should start talking now." Yoongi said, his tough facade suddenly up to somewhat defend himself and his true emotions. But on the inside, everything in him screamed for Hoseok, for his touch, for his voice, for his kiss. He missed him and seeing him right there in front of him, so close to him yet so far away made the tears start to form slowly in his eyes. 

"I know this is going to sound cliché and fucked up, but will you please listen to me?" Hoseok asked, eyes begging as he took a step closer to Yoongi who was still keeping up his facade. He only nodded at Hoseok and waited for him to continue. 

"I'm so sorry that I dragged you into all this bullshit. It was never my intention, you have to know that. It was never my plan to keep talking to you once we had made sure you wouldn't tell anyone what you saw, but I couldn't help myself. There's just something about you that I can't explain. It's like this force that just pulls me towards you. I don't know how to explain it. And it got me in so much trouble, because as time went by I just realised that all I wanted to do was keep you safe but I couldn't do that because I was the one you needed to be protected from. And like the selfish bastard I was, I thought that if I just didn't tell you about what I do, you would continue to be with me and you would be safe. But I was wrong. Shit, I was so wrong. I got you fucking assaulted, I got you roofied, I got you kidnapped, I got a man after you who you thought was your friend but he turned out to be a spy who was after me. I got you fucking stabbed in the thigh and got words carved into your skin. And I know I have no place to ask for forgiveness, and I can understand if you hate me-" Hoseok was interrupted from his grand speech by Yoongi's small voice. 

"I don't hate you Hoseok." Those words came straight from Yoongi's heart and into Hoseok's. The ravenette had tearstained cheeks and glossy eyes as he stared into Hoseok's deep brown ones that was full of regret. 

"You don't?" Hoseok asked, surprise clear in his voice. He had expected Yoongi to flip completely out, he had expected him to yell at him, to tell him just how much he hated him for ruining his life. 

"No, I don't."