Mindless Dreams and Nightmares

Chapter 14: A Window Into My Mind

Dedicated to Nasyah <3 Such a sweet girl, she reminds me a bit of myself lol :) Another Londoner who doesnt live off tea and likes ChoiceFM ^.^ We are quite rare, you see everyone in London drinks tea with the Queen on Thursdays, but me and Nasyah spend our Thursdays reading and writing together ^.^ lmfao shes sweet and she kinda predicted whats about to happen^.^ I kinda think you all did :3

-Jameelah's POV- 

I sat in English class at my desk playing with my pen trying to figure out what to write. I wondered what Prodigy was doing today, he had said yesterday that him and the boys had a day off in New York, soo he was probably shopping or- My English teacher, Ms Harisson's fingers drummed on the desk in front of me pulling me out of my daydream. "Jameelah, you need to concentrate. You should be writing not daydreaming" She hissed at me.

"I dont know what to write." I mumbled back. In London I had just been an average student, I didnt pass with flying colours but I didnt fail any of my classes. Here it was a lot harder to keep up, the only lessons I was on top of was Maths and Public Speaking Class.

"Thats the point of automatic writing! You just write whatever comes, no plan and no thought required. I dont care what it is, just put your pen to the paper." She said walking back to the front of the class.I put my pen to the paper and began to write. My pen swirled and swooped over the page and by the time the teacher called for pens down I had written just over half a page. I looked down at my paper impressed with myself when I heard Ms Harrisson say "Okay, now I will ask each of you to stand up and read your papers out to the class. There are no exceptions, you will all do it. Since I know none of you will offer to go first we will go in reverse alphabetical order. Stacey Richards, off you go"  

Stacey got up from her desk and made her way to the front of the class. I glanced at my paper again, this time the proud smile I had was replaced with a frown. No way was I reading this out to a class full of strangers. It was like a window into my mind. I had written things down on this paper that I didnt even realise I was thinking about. No way was I about to share it. I looked around the class, I knew I was 4th from the top of the register, I did a quick head count of the class. 27, including myself. Meaning I was to be the 23rd person to read.  

Time went by, there was only two more people to read their work out before it was my turn. I hadnt really listened to everyones reading because I was desperately thinking of a way to get out of reading mine out. As Skye stood up and made her way to the front of the class she looked every bit as nervous as I felt. Out of everyone I'd met since coming to America I like Skye the best. She acts really tough and ghetto but shes really a sweetheart. I stopped feeling nervous for a minute and looked up to listen to her.

You think you know me and I know you dont care but there is something I dont wanna hide any longer, something I need to share. My mind and my actions are completely different bew, huh what? yeah lemme break it down to you. I act tough when I feel like crying, laugh when I feel like dying and attack instead of whining. I guess you could call me a dark horse, now watch me gallop. I aint finna lie to you, Im gonna say it straight, when I finish this your minds gonna feel raped. This may just be english class, something y'all wanna pass but to me this is my life. Words are beautiful and I love 'em like my wife. Yeah, you heard right, if I could I'd be up all night Id just be Writing Talking Singing and Rhyming. Thats what I love, thats my weakness, give me a beat and I'll go obscene on it. I have a million friends and a million more enemies, but I dont care its just whatever to me. Words will be my life, my lover, my soul help me through the struggle and strife. There. learn something new everyday, Lesson 1 Skye's a geek, a little wordy freak, times running out. So there it is. My speech.

I blinked at her. Woah. This girl had mad talent. She had turned her automatic writing piece into a freestyle and it was awesome. I put my hands together and clapped hard. Soon the whole class was clapping too. The applause went on for ages, Skye blushed at first and then began smiling, she looked at me and I flashed her a thumbs up. The bell went and Skye siddled back to her seat. Miss Harisson came back to the front of the class and said "Thank you to everybody who read out their work, for those of you who didnt, leave yours at the front of my desk and I will mark them for you. Okay off you go. Enjoy your lunch"