Driven Mad (Book 1 in the MAD Series)(An Avengers Fan Fiction)

Jan Van Dyne

Jan sat down on the edge of her bed and flopped onto her back, letting her short hair spill over the crumpled, messy sheets. She closed her eyes, her long lashes lightly brushing her cheeks as she inhaled the cool air. She longed for company, but, for the first time in awhile, she had none. Angel had gone off with some of the X-Men for a short night off, still on call if they were needed but not feeling the need to remain in the Helicarrier. Nate, who wasn’t an official X-Men or Avenger, had gone off to who-knows-where. He just stayed on the Helicarrier every now and again because he liked Jan. But she really couldn’t see a future with either man.

She liked Christopher Tennant.

He was absolutely fantastic. He was a gentleman and he called her nearly every night. They’re grown close, Skyping once or twice a week, talking for endless hours. He was the only real reason she was reluctant to go running back to Hank. She loved Hank as much as she always did, but she was becoming extremely conflicted because of her new beau. She cared about him and she didn’t know if it was as simple as things were with Nate and Warren. They were sweet but not quite what she wanted. They were her toys, and though she honestly felt guilty about stringing them along, they were well aware of how things were and they knew that she wasn’t going to be the victim. They knew very well that she was the player and, of course, those two were the game. They were around when she wanted company and they were like her own personal arm-candy. Though she hadn’t been the type to ever do something like that, she found herself enjoying it.

But Christopher was different than Warren or Nate. He was charming and intelligent and very, very British, which she found incredibly sexy. The two would talk for hours without end, talking about anything and everything. He told her stories and his constant flattery and attention knew no end. She was just waiting for him to make the first real move and ask her to make it official. Then they could get to know each other better after the war and they could live happily ever after… Without Hank.

 Jan still adored Hank, but she didn’t want to go back to the life of being constantly ignored. She enjoyed the flattery and the attention that she was finally getting. She loved Hank, and a part of her always would, but did she honestly want to go back to that life? Jan rolled off of the bed and onto the floor, pain shooting through her but quickly subsiding. She pressed her face into the carpet and groaned. She wanted Hank back…

Jan had everything. Her team was back in action, ever since Bruce and Betty had been rescued. Yes, they lost one of their team, but not really. She had just… What was the word? She had regenerated, or at least that was how Bruce Banner had put it. Yes, the majority of the team was hurting, and they all knew that they had some avenging to do. But what had Jan lost? She hadn’t had the time to grow close to Billie. She wasn’t glad that the fourteen year old mutant had died, but the Pixie hadn’t grown overly attached to her, so she wasn’t so brokenhearted about her death that she wasn’t functioning well, not like Johnny or Bruce, who were the closest people to her. But if things were going okay for her, why was she so miserable?

Then she remembered something that could change her mind.

“The note.” Jan breathed, remembering the note that Hank had handed her before she went to that dance. Feeling the urge to have Hank again, she whipped her head up and looked around anxiously for the purse she brought to the dance, where she’d dropped the note and she’d never taken it out. She jerked out the envelope and pulled it out, revealing three pieces of paper that had been stapled together and folded up. Jan opened them up and began reading every word.

Dear Jan,

Hey… I have a lot of apologies to make to you. I screwed everything up, and Natasha warned me about doing this. I really do love you, and I always have. I always will. I realize that you probably more or less hate me right now, but I’m sitting out in the hallway outside of your door right now and I can hear you crying. I hate the thought of you being so sad, especially because I know it was me who made you sad. I hate that I ever did that to you. I love you, Jan. Now I’m going to take this opportunity to say everything I didn’t say to you before.