On The Couch [Editing]

Chapter Six

Strangely enough, I felt relieved as I arrived at Stacy’s house. My weekend so far has been lacking.

All day Saturday, all I could think about is what does this mean, and all the research I had done played in my head. I kept going back to it, reading the web pages over and over again. I was trying to find any loop hole, or way out of this new arrangement as patient and client. I’m sure there was one, but I couldn’t find it.

Did I really want to?

It’s as if my own selfish reasons were blocking any rational thought or answer that could possibly be staring me in the face. Because I knew deep down inside I did want to see him again. I wanted to figure this man out and prove something to him. I felt challenged to prove I am not the crazy irate person he met that first day, especially now that I would be seeing him in my professional world.

I began to tell myself this while I walked Boxer and walked him longer than I should have down at the docks. Usually my neighbor watched him when I was at work, but on the weekends this was my quality time with my dog. He slept the rest of the day when we arrived home and I felt bad that I had let my thoughts consume me and over exercised my precious dog. He seemed to forgive me this morning when he woke me up by jumping on my chest and licking my chin, demanding his breakfast.

So I did feel a happy sense of relief and distraction to be here. I stopped by the grocery store on my way here and picked up some red wine. Knowing Stacy and what she likes to cook, red wine would fit nicely with whatever she whipped up. The sun had just begun to set as I stepped out of my car. I looked out over the horizon as the sky seemed to change colors in slow motion. The daytime baby blue sky began to show signs of color, swirls of pinks, oranges, reds and purples with the shadowing of small cloud clusters.

Stacy lived up in the hills in a residential area of Sausalito. Kenneth and she rented a three bedroom house together. It was smarter than buying one until they got married in my opinion. Though it was obvious Kenneth was smitten with her and she loved him. I used to envy their relationship in the beginning of my therapy. Ugh, therapy…my next session was in two days. I didn’t want to think about it, my head hurt as it was from all the information I discovered and thoughts on that.

I headed up the porch and let myself in the oak door. They didn’t hear me, but I heard them. I smiled walking quietly through the house to the kitchen in the back. I could hear them arguing as they always did over silly things as I walked through the house. It was nice with a country home feel to it, Stacy’s doing. The fireplace even had one of those decorative wagon wheels above it in the center. Afghans and mismatched wood furniture arranged around some modern comfort pieces it might look out of place to someone who doesn’t know who lives here, but it all worked nicely in contrast. Plus, the den was all Kenneth’s, his ‘man cave’.

“You’re adding the sauce all wrong, don’t stir, fold it in,” Stacy said with a slight annoyed tone to her voice.

“Does it really matter?” Kenneth barked at her and I could hear the urge to laugh in his voice.

“Stirring will break the pasta and thin out the sauce for the chicken parmesan,” Stacy whined as I stepped into the kitchen.

“Looks like I brought the wrong wine then,” my face lit up with an amused smile at the two of them. Both Stacy and Kenneth looked up from the stove. They both had a grip on the spatula in the sauce pot as if they had been dueling for it back and forth.

“Hey blue eyes,” Stacy called letting go of the handle instantly and coming over to give me a hug. “Don’t worry about the wine red is fine for the marinara sauce.”

Behind her back, I see Kenneth make a mocking face mimicking her as he stirred the sauce.

“I said fold Kenneth.” Stacy snapped while still hugging me.