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Taraji's POV
After a long night of much needed rest and thinking over my conversation with Danielle, I decided that I was finally ready to see Fantasia the next day. I can't completely shut her out and force Danielle to play telephone between us. The only way she's ever going to truly understand where I'm coming from is if she hears it directly from me. Lack of communication is the main reason why we had the huge blowout fights that we used to have. I wanna do things differently this time around. When she came into my room, the first thing I noticed was that she was wearing the same clothes she wore the first time she attempted to visit me and things didn't go so well. She's been letting herself slip just to prove her unconditional loyalty to me. That makes me even more nervous to tell her the things that I have to tell her. I just hope and pray that she understands why.
Taraji: You know Nurse Brandee told me that you hadn't left my side. I see that she was right. You haven't been taking care of yourself.
Fantasia: The only thing that mattered to me was making sure that you're ok. I couldn't rest or eat or sleep until I saw that for myself.
Taraji: The codependency has to stop, for the both of us. You can't fall apart in my absence. I can't worry about you self-destructing when I'm not around. I can't carry that pressure with me. I would never want to put that kind of pressure on you.
Fantasia: I can't help it. I never want to let you out of my sight again. I blame myself for what happened to you.
Taraji: Why?
Fantasia: Because instead of trying to figure out why you weren't at dinner with me, I immediately assumed the worst. I made up all kinds of stories in my head about what you were doing when you weren't with me. I wished the worst kinds of things on you, but I swear I didn't mean any of it baby. I was just angry and confused. I thought that you were playing me.
I physically winced when she said that she wished harm on me because she thought that I stood her up on purpose. I blinked back tears before they could even form in my eyes. She was getting emotional, too. She had tears in her eyes, but she wouldn't let them fall in front of me. Maybe she thinks she doesn't deserve to cry because of what she's done, but she's punishing herself for no reason because I've already forgiven her. I just can't give myself to her in the way that she wants me to anymore. It's time that Taraji gives herself to Taraji.
Taraji: I can't blame you for thinking that. I was always stringing you along, wanting you one minute and pushing you away the next. If I were you, I would have thought the same thing.
Fantasia: You don't have to try to make me feel better. I deserve to feel shitty.
Taraji: I'm not trying to make you feel better. I'm being honest. I've been thinking about what I would say to you when I was finally ready to see you again, but there's really nothing to think about. The only thing to say is the truth.
