Just one more pill 5sos fanfic Luke Hemmings, Ashton Irwin ( #wattys2015 )

Chapter 39.

I sat waiting at Sophia's funeral.

Everything was black.

Not because it's normally what you wear to funerals, but because that was her favorite color.

They weren't that many people there. Sophia didn't really get the chance to know any of them.

The day was cold, not the kind of cold you hate. The kind that makes you realize how much you love weather.

It smelled of strong vanilla and cinnamon.

I just listened quietly as a preacher went on and on about how she would be going to a better place.

I just laughed, Sophia always made joke about how she was going straight to hell.

"Dude im going to hell anyways" She would cheer when she fucked up.

Life is a game.

It's a game that you have to know how to play well.

Everyone desires something in life, whether it be love or companion or even pure pain, everyone has a goal.

Something that always confused me about death is that people always say there in a better place, and that all the pain is gone, yet when people commit suicide it's considered a sin and a horrible thing. Maybe that person just wanted the pain gone to.

I zoned out about half way through the preacher talking.

"Luke will you take care of Alex"

Those words burned in my head.

I never got a proper chance to say goodbye. I took her for granted even well she was almost dead, and now she's really gone.

Kate and me where supposed to speak about her. I hadn't written anything because I suck at writing and I would never be able to express my feelings for her though it. No one would understand how close Sophia, Kate, and I were.

Kate was on.

She gave a wonderful speech bring back painful memories of things we did three summers ago. She talked about how we first met. She talked about her and Sophia personally. She made a lot of people laugh, and even more cry.

I was on next.

As I started walking up I could feel my heart pounding in my chest ad I walked up to the podium covered in purple rose's.

"You could never lable this person. Sophia Caroline Mess was my best friend, and even if none of you knew her as the person I knew, at least you got the honer of getting to know her at all. Sophia was never one of those people who would put themselves out there, she was quite and shy, until you really got to know her. If you knew her well enough you would find that she was amazingly hilarious and super nice. She was selfless and caring of others. She always shared, even when she was close to having nothing. You could feel her energy when she walked in a room. Now I know she didn't belive in going to heaven and I think even hell" I said eyeing the preacher "I think that the only thing that was trying to keep her alive was her dedication to prove the people who shut her down wrong. I remember a time, when me and Sophia had just met. She would never speak, she just nodded yes or no, about five weeks later I invited her to my house, her eyes widen up. That was the first sleepover she was ever invited too. Later did I know she would be my best friend. The person I looked up to. Even though Sophia's not hear physically, she lives in all of us. She lives though the music that makes us want to rebel against the standards. She lives through the cold wind, because it reminds us how much we like to stay warm. She will be remembered by me as an awesome friend, with enough love to last a century. But her life was taken away, cut short.

But I know she's looking down at us from wherever she is saying 'I miss you, but you have to live your life' so let's take her words and life our lifes, let's follow our dreams. Let's never care what anyone says. Let's be truely ourselves. "

"I would rather be hated for who I am than who I am then loved for someone I'm not" -Kurt Cobain