Painful love~Elmax~

Chapter 33: Party Catch Ups

Max's pov

Me and the party were chatting. They've told me the drama at school and stuff. "so no one gave a shit" I said laughing. I mean, I didn't expect anyone besides my friends to miss me.

Honestly, I'm not getting along with anyone much. If someone asks me something normally of course I'll reply or help. But when they give me that dirty look. They've been calling me slurs since middle school so I don't really care anymore

All I care about is my friends and el. I have them. Why care about others. I don't like them anyways. They made me feel this way. It was wrong of me 'changing' somehow after the hate I got by being tough after.

I then just accepted the fact that I'm disgusting, dressed like a boy, a girl who plays video games and skates etc. Even when Dustin and lucas came to talk to me the first day I've come to Hawkins middle school.

I was sort of mean. I was in a 'I don't care' vibe because I knew no one would want to be friends with me since everyone found me disgusting and many other things I've mentioned. Then I made the best decision, I've decided to say no to my negative thoughts.

I for once thought to give them a chance. Maybe they're fine. And it was correct. They're the best friends I could ever ask for. They were cool.

They didn't make fun of me by playing video games,skating. Okay I suppose they found it weird, because it's not common from a girl. But they thought it was cool after from what they've told me and showed me.

Well, except for Mike. We're not talking about him. It's too much. In short words, he hated me since the day he saw me. Obviously he was jealous. But let's forget about that.

Mike is good now. He might still be a jerk and annoying but we're good now. We're just joking around. Bully each other somehow. But not in a terrible way, more jokingly.

El's pov

Max, the boys and I were talking. "I mean, the whole class asked where were you" lucas said. "did you tell them I was in coma?" I asked. They nodded. "Yeah, that guy nick was worried about you I could tell. He's into you to. It was obvious from the start" Dustin said. As soon as Dustin said that I felt bad feeling. Jealousy.

"who's nick?" max asked confused as she looked at me. I was trying my best to hide my jealousy. Why was I jealous? Sure I'm in love with her but I'm jealous hearing that other people/guys like her.

I'm just afraid she'll leave me for some boy. "uhh a curly haired brunette with brown eyes, medium height? He once tried to start a conversation with you by asking for a pencil, even though he had one but you just gave him the pencil and then ignored him" Dustin said laughing at the end. So did everyone.

I tried to laugh too. I was still jealous. I noticed will looking at me. Did he notice my Jealousy? I don't know. He for sure sensed something I guess. I looked away immediately.

"ohh I remember" max said. He knows him. Great.. Don't be so jealous he just asked for a pencil but he's into her. I mean, how could he not but she's mine. She likes girls el. She likes me. I need to stop feeling like this before max notices.

It was too late I guess.. Max looked at me. "I don't like him, love. I'm only yours and you're mine" she whispered leaning closer to me so only I can hear her. I couldn't help but smile as I nodded.

The boys were staring at us after. "soo um, since when this have been happening? Was it before.. You know, Neil?" Dustin asked pointing at max and I. We both blushed and looked at each other.

"oh um, a bit before" max answered. "hey, I'm not against it I'm just curious" Dustin said smiling nervously. "yeah we know Dustin, don't worry, I'm glad you're okay with it. It's been my biggest fear to be honest" max said smiling. I nodded in agreement.

Max's pov

"nah, I'm totally okay. It's pretty cool actually. My favourite girls being together, that's great" Dustin said smiling. His sweet smile is the best. It always cheers me up.

We all smiled as el and I made eye contact. "did-did anyone know before me? I didn't really ask when you were in coma. I didn't think it was the right time. I've been worried about you so it wasn't as I important. I'm curious" Dustin said.

"it's okay, I understand that you want to know and we don't mind at all. You're our friend" max said. I nodded agreeing. "so um,it's kind of a long story. Billy one day caught me crying in my room-" I started

"why were you crying?" Mike asked. "gay problems? I was afraid, confused with my feelings. I thought everyone would hate me and stuff. Well, I cried for el because I thought I was hopeless but it was wrong" I said looking at el. She gave me a warm smile

"well Billy accepted me, made me feel better. It such a big relief. Then I guess will suspected it. Lucas knew before will I think. After our fight from what they've told me. That's it, then everyone found out by Neil catching el and I kissing then, got kidnapped, got shot and in coma" I said casually.

It was great feeling to talk about. They make me feel like I can talk to them. I stopped being afraid of what they'll think of me. They looked genuinely okay with it. Having anyone to talk about it is a big relief.

Because people like me find it extremely difficult. For all obvious reasons. I thought everyone would hate me and not love me anymore. But I was wrong. I know the rest of the world is hella homophobic but there is nothing I can do about it

Unfortunately, we'll have to get through that too. It sounds funny but I call them, gay problems. I cried myself to sleep every single night because of who I was.

I was disgusted by myself. I hated myself. I kept asking and begging the god to change me because I knew liking girls isn't normal. The fear that even if el wouldn't feel the same way, would she treat me differently? Would she still be friends with me after confessing my feelings for her?

What would Neil and my mom think? Billy.
Would they kick me out. Hate me? Find me disgusting. These were highly possibilities. Neil was the worst one. My mom and Billy unsurprisingly okay with it. So  many questions..

Dustin and the others nodded. "I always knew Neil was a jerk but I never thought he would literally shoot you for liking girls. Love is just love, it's so unfair" Dustin said. I slowly nodded agreeing.

We then talked a bit more about random stuff waiting for my mom and hopper for any further news from the doctor. They said they would give us time to catch up. Talk to each other because obviously I've been in coma.

*meanwhile*

Nancy's pov

I was so happy max woke up. I really cared about her. We may not be so close but I care about each of Mike's friends. Hopper, Joyce and max's mom left to talk to the doctor. Wait for him so they can talk.

Jonathan, Steve Robin, Billy and I waited outside max's room. Billy at some point went to the bathroom. I was sitting next to Robin. Which made me happy but nervous. Jonathan and Steve were sitting opposite us.

Robin next to me looked deep in thoughts. I wanted to hold her hand badly. But I was too scared. I felt eyes on me. I looked over at Jonathan. It was him. Shit. I still feel very guilty for breaking Jonathan's heart.

He said he's okay with it. He accepted it but of course he's still heart broken. He gave me an encouraging smile as he looked at Robin and I. I looked at him nervously.

He genuinely smiled even more. 'do it' he mouthed to me. I smiled getting the courage. I slowly put my hand over Robin's keeping eye contact with Jonathan as he was smiling at me. I know it was hurting him but I'm glad he was happy for me.

1443 words. To be continued!!
How's life people?? :)