Just One Night With You (Book 3 in the Just Series)

Chapter 17

Jason

"Make yourself at home," I said to Zarah once we were inside my home.

"You have a beautiful home," she said.

I turned towards her. "Thanks," I said.

I frowned at the look on her face.

The sadness and the pain is back. It's written all over her face, no matter how hard she tries to hide it.

I walk towards her.

"What's wrong, angel?" I asked.

"I don't know what you mean?"

"You look sad."

She frowned and forced out a laugh. "Nothing's wrong Jason. I told you, I'm just tired," she said and she tried to move away from me, but I held her in place.

"I know that something is bothering you and I think I know what it is. It's me isn't it?"

She shook her head. "I don't know what you're talking about," she denied.

"Zarah, I can see it in your eyes. The sadness. The pain. I know because it's a look, I will never ever forget. I'm the one who put that there. I'm the reason for your pain, sadness, and anger."

"I told you, it's all in the past."

"Bullshit!"

"I don't care if you believe me or not. I've made my peace with what happened."

"That's bullshit. But in case you need reminding let me... I found out you were a virgin and freaked out and acted like I was repulsed."

"Stop it," she said but I kept going.

"You told me you love me, and I threw it back on your face."

"I said stop!" She said more forcefully this time. But again. I ignored her and continued despite her continued plea for me to stop.

"I told you you were just a way to scratch an itch. That you were just another conquest. Told you you weren't special. Told you I could fuck any girl I wanted..."

"That's enough Jason," she said as her hands curled into a fist.

"I told you not to confuse lust with love..."

"Stop it! Just stop!" she screamed at me as she broke into sobs as she covered her ears to block out my words. "I hate you," she screamed at me. "I hate you, she said again in a sob, as she broke down.

I held her and allowed her to cry out her anger and pain. I was thankful that she didn't push me away. She held on to me as she cried.

A few moments later her sobs and cries subsided and she pulled away from me.

"Zarah, I'm so sorry. More sorry than I can say. I know I hurt you terribly. I was a fucking asshole. I treated you callously and I'm so fucking sorry. You have no idea how many times I have thought about that night," I forced out a harsh breath. "Fuck, I thought that night every single day. I see the wounded look on your face, every time I close my eyes. Every time I think about you, I feel sick to my stomach remembering the awful things I said to you. There is not a single day that went by that I didn't think about it. That I didn't think about you."

"Is that why you were in the arms of another woman the very next day?"

"Nothing happened. It was all for show I wanted to prove to myself that you meant nothing to me and that I was still the same guy. And that I was still in control of my self and my emotions. None if those women meant anything to me."