Just One Night With You (Book 3 in the Just Series)

Chapter 16

Jason

"Hello?" I answered my phone without looking at who's calling.

"Hey bro."

It's Luke.

"Hey," I groaned.

"Are you okay man?"

"Yeah. Fine. I just have a headache. Lack of sleep I guess," I said.

"That's what you get when you're all work and no fun, little brother."

"Yeah. Yeah. Is there a point to this phone call?" I asked gruffly.

He chuckled. "Just wondering how you're doing little brother."

I snorted. "You just want me to spill my guts to you. But I'm going to tell you the same thing I told Ethan. You can ask questions, but I don't guarantee I'm going to answer it."

He laughed. "Well, it was worth a try. You seemed really into her. When you saw her at the club, you couldn't take your eyes off of her. And shit dude. She's your best friend's sister."

"Don't worry about it. He already knows and we talked about it. We're okay. We understand each other."

"That's good then. You're serious about her?"

"Of course! But why are we talking about me? What about you? Find your boom yet?"

He snorted. "Please. Been there. Done that. No plans on doing it again."

"Sheree wasn't your boom Luke. You're ego was wounded and hurt, not your heart. If you're t ask me, I always thought that Oli..."

"Don't!" He growled.

"Fine," I surrendered. "Anyways, Sheree was just... Wait was she? You didn't sleep with her, she was just your distraction..."

"I regret calling you."

"I just want you to be happy, the way you want me to be happy."

"I don't need a woman in my life to be happy. I'm happy the way I'm living my life. Besides, it's better to have no strings attached hook ups. I don't need any complications in my life."

"Yeah, wait till you meet your boom. And besides what did gramps tell us before he died? Make sure we find our 'love'"

"Bite your tongue, little brother! I'm done with love!"

I chuckled. "Anyways, I should get going."

"Alright. Talk to you again soon."

"Bye," I said ending the call.

I reached over my drawer and took a couple of pain killers for my headache.

***

"Hey angel, how was your day?" I asked as I kissed Zarah on her cheek.

"Good," she said.

Something seems off. She looks like she's tensed. It was subtle, but I felt her stiffen when I reached for her and kissed her on her cheek.

I wanted to ask what happened and what was wrong, but I decided to wait.

The drive to my place was awkward. The silence between us was unnerving. It wasn't the same comfortable silence we used to share sometimes. There was tension between us. It was palpable. I don't know what happened between this morning when I dropped by at her shop and tonight when I picked her up. But something was clearly bothering Zarah.

"You okay angel?" I asked but she didn't answer. She was looking out the window.

"Angel?"

"Huh? What?"

"Are you okay?

"Huh? Oh... Yeah... Sorry... I was just thinking and I'm a little tired. It was a busy day today," she said.

I know there was more to it, but I didn't push her.

Zarah

I can tell that Jason wasn't buying my excuse about having a busy and tiring day. Honestly after my conversation with my sisters, I haven't stopped thinking about what a going on between us. About what I should do.

I'm so confused and still so hurt. I don't know if I can forgive so easily, the way that Ara and Ellie forgave Mass and Marco.

The entire drive to his place was in an uncomfortable silence. I sat hunched in the passenger seat, as I looked out the window. My mind was thinking about all the things that I can do and say to Jason. I also thought about the things that he can do and say to me that will just confuse me even more.

I thought back to our date last night. The way he surprised me. The way he made me feel. I try to harden my heart against him. I don't want to feel soft. I want to hold on to my anger... My hate...

It's all I have...

But damn it, I love him so much.

Tears start to well up in my eyes at the thought. I bit the inside of my cheeks to stop my tears from falling.

Damn it, Zarah! Don't you dare cry in front of him!

I'm completely overwhelmed just sitting next to Jason. I'm overwhelmed by everything.

My heart is pounding.

My hands are sweating.

My stomach is turning.

There were so many things that were so wrong between the two of us, but then there were also some things that seem right.

Sometimes I can even forget about my anger and find myself enjoying and being happy just being with him, but then I remember and then I go back to being angry.

I feel the pain all over again and I start to hate him again.

I just... I just want my heart to stop breaking... I want to stop hurting.

Every time I remember that night and the things he said to me, it's as if it all happened yesterday. And no matter how many times I tell my self to move on and forget about it, I can't.

I simply can't...

I clenched my jaw to try and stop my self from crying and breaking down in front of Jason.

I honestly don't know what to do anymore...

I closed my eyes tightly.

Please make it stop, I begged.

Make the pain go away...

Please...