^^^She’s always harassing me for an update. =P
Also to @kewkiess for the cute banner on the side, love it. =)
Christy’s POV
Safe.
The word kept repeating through my mind, calling to me like a neon bar sign flashing the word ‘open’ beckons to an alcoholic.
Not the most flattering comparison, but it was the most fitting one my traumatized mind could conjure up at the moment.
As I stood there clutching at James, taking in his warmth and the scent of him, I couldn’t remember the last time I wanted so badly to be held by anyone. I needed the comfort it provided like that drunk needed his next sip of a tonic. He needed the oblivion that alcohol provided, while I needed the safety an embrace provided.
I could feel my heart rate calming as my bruised lips throbbed to the beat of it. My tears were most likely mingling with snot at this point, but I was still too upset to care that I was probably wiping both of those, along with traces of blood from my battered lips all over James’ white button down shirt.
Screw it, he was a professor. He probably had a butt load of them waiting in reserve back in his room.
My sobs began to turn into sniffles as I nuzzled my face into his chest further, in hopes that it would just absorb me into him and I could become him and forget all of my own worries.
He had one hand threaded through my hair, holding my head against his heart that was still pounding a bit erratically, and the other was rubbing small circles up and down my back in a soothing fashion.
Taking a deep breath in preparation, I spoke the words that had been longing to come out. The words that don’t always fix everything, but at least show you’re trying, “I’m sorry.”
His hands stilled as he stiffened slightly, before slowly relaxing again.
“Christy, after what just happened, which you will be filling me in on by the way, the last thing you need to worry about doing is apologizing to me,” he ground out, sounding unbelievably frustrated with me.
“I just had to say it,” was my only explanation as my fingers let up on their death clutch on his back, and began to dance across his taut muscles in hopes of comforting him as he had been comforting me.
But the safety of his embrace was quickly turning into need; I needed this man before me whether I wanted to or not. He had become an integral part of my being somewhere along the way, and I was not willing to lose him. I wasn’t willing to let him go. We could hurt each other a million times in a million different ways, and I’d still come back, time and time again ready for another round and another make up.
He was my addiction. My unhealthy not so wise addiction, but he was mine. He was my choice, and I could only hope that I was still his.
“Guys?” Jumping slightly from the sound of Leslie’s voice, I turned my head to her and took in her worried expression. “I think someone’s coming,” she explained, looking apologetic.
Closing my eyes tightly, I couldn’t help but wish the world would just cease to exist for a few more moments, or at least fuck off and stop interrupting my moments with James.
Then again, what could I really expect when we were standing on the stairs that led to a wing of dorm rooms?
Breathing him in one last time, I took a step back, mourning the loss of his touch as soon as his hands fell away from me.
And then the feelings of disgust and shame flooded my being, as memories of what Scott had done slammed into my mind with a brutal force.
Ducking my head to hide my face, I hid behind my veil of hair and wrapped my arms around myself in hopes of holding myself together before I exploded from the inside out. I could envision little fragments of myself splattering the walls and those around me.
I heard my name being called as if from a vast distance, but couldn’t find my voice to answer. It was as though I was closing in on myself; my mind rejecting what had happened and my body shutting down to escape all of the abuse that had been inflicted upon it in the matter of a 24 hour period.
Little dots of black were dancing across my vision as chills began to rack my body.
And then there was warmth again. I was floating through the air, my limbs felt weightless and limp even as my senses began to come alive again. I could smell him as his warmth seeped into the blizzard of despair that had overtaken me, freezing me and choking me in its frigid grip.
James had me, and once again I was safe.
James’ POV
I would kill him.
It was the one constant and prominent thought in my mind as I carried Christy’s limp body back to my room, and Leslie filled me in on what had happened.
I didn’t care that someone might see me, and I didn’t care that there would potentially be gossip and consequences if someone did.
Right now, in this moment, all that mattered was Christy and making sure she was alright. Then I would track down Scott and make sure he never touched her again.
I would make him pay for every time he had ever hurt her, every time he had even thought about her.
Placing Christy on my bed I noticed a slight movement behind me, causing me to start. Turning around I saw that Leslie had followed me into my room. Her face was pale and I could see the worry clouding her expression.
“She’ll be okay…right?” she whispered, her eyes pleading with me to tell her what she wanted to hear.
“I’m sure she will be,” I told her, turning my gaze back to Christy’s pale face and noticing the large bump and bruising that covered her forehead, the scratches on her cheek and her swollen, lacerated lips.
I felt rage fill me, my vision turning hazy as my mind began shouting at me to make Scott pay for his actions and to do so now.
A hand gripped my shoulder, making my head snap towards the person it belonged to.
“You need to calm down. Scott didn’t do most of that,” Leslie spoke, a small smirk of amusement gracing her lips. “She got lost in the woods last night and tripped. By the way, she thought it was you in here yesterday,” she said looking nervous.
And then it all clicked into place.
The reason she took off, and the reason I was still sporting a slight imprint of a hand across my cheek.
Narrowing my eyes, I couldn’t help the snarl that escaped my lips, “You realize that because you apparently couldn’t keep your legs closed and my idiot friend couldn’t keep it in his pants, not only was Christy scared and alone all night, but she also got hurt? Not to mention it led to me getting slapped and blamed for something I didn’t do.”
I watched as she backed slowly away from me, her hand that had been on my shoulder dropped away and she looked at me both with guilt and shame battling for dominance on her face.
“I’m so sorry. We weren’t thinking…” she trailed off at a loss for words.
I knew she was sorry, but she needed to understand how her actions affected others, and now was the perfect time to make her understand.
“Do you realize that Christy could have knocked herself completely unconscious out there and that it could have been days before anyone thought to look in the woods to find her? That she could have broken a limb and not been able to get out on her own? That she could have dehydrated or any other number of things that come along with being stuck out in the woods with no help or provisions,” I pressed on, and saw her face grow paler with every new scenario I gave.
I saw her lips quiver and decided to relent a bit.
“Listen, I know you would never purposely do anything to hurt her, but you need to realize that everything you do affects someone else in some way,” I explained, softening my look.
“I’ll keep that in mind from now on. Just take care of Christy for now. I need to go let Ryan know what happened. I know he’s on the outs with her right now, but he’ll want to know. He’s been worried about her just like we have,” she stated, backing out of the room slowly.
“If he was so worried about her he should have done something sooner instead of moping because he wasn’t getting all of Christy’s attention,” I growled, still upset that he hadn’t alerted anyone right away when he knew she might be in trouble.
“Everyone makes mistakes. You need to realize that. He’s her best friend too, and he loves her. He deserves to know she’s okay,” she rationalized before turning and walking out the door, closing it softly behind her.
Turning my attention back to Christy, I sat by her side on the bed tracing my fingers over her face, memorizing every feature of the girl who had come to mean more to me than I dared to admit, even to myself.
Just being able to touch her again was enough to calm me down.
I still had every intention to make Scott pay, but now I could plan it out rationally instead of just beating the shit out of him, which had been my first plan of action.
And I would make him pay. He would regret what he had done to Christy, and I was going to make sure it was something that would affect him for years to come and how he treated any other female from now on.
Smiling slightly, I sat quietly by Christy’s side and plotted the downfall of Scott.
Leslie’s POV
Walking towards Ryan’s room, I thought over what James had just said to me. I knew he was right, and that he was making a point on purpose because he was upset about what had happened to Christy. That he wanted to make sure nothing like that happened in the future because of another of my bad decisions.
So I promised myself that I would not allow one of my decisions to ever hurt Christy, or anyone else, like that again. I would be a better friend from now on, and think about others instead of just going along with whatever and living in the moment.
And this must be what it feels like to grow up…
Smiling to myself at my epiphany, I looked up and saw Ryan’s door. Knocking on it, I waited patiently for someone to open it.
I heard a thump from inside and a muttered curse before the door was wrenched open and I saw Ryan’s tired eyes staring back at me.
He looked like hell. His eyes were bloodshot, he needed to shave, and his hair was mussed up all over his head.
When his eyes focused on my face I saw the hope flash within them that I was coming with good news.
“She’s back, if a bit worse for wear,” I interjected, “but she’s safe now. There was an issue with Scott though…” I trailed off nervously when I saw the rage fill his eyes, and the muscle in his cheek begin to jump spasmodically.
That was never a good sign…
“What the fuck did he do?” he ground out, fists clenching and unclenching. He really looked like he wanted to pummel something…or better yet, someone.
“Can I come in? I’ll explain everything, but you need to chill out. You won’t be any good to her if you get your ass thrown out of here for assaulting another student. Not to mention you’ll pretty much be throwing away your future,” I reasoned, pleading with him to not do anything rash with my eyes.
Taking a deep breath he opened the door further and waved me inside. Somehow I knew that I was going to have to talk fast, and hold onto him tight so he didn’t go after Scott and beat the piss out of him.
I had a feeling by the end of this day I was going to need a few stiff drinks.
Further epiphanies and growing up might just have to be placed on hold until tomorrow…
~*~
Hope you guys enjoyed! I had planned on writing sooner, but then I ended up moving which took a while. Then I was sick at the beginning of the week, and to top the week off, my daughter ended up getting strep throat, my tire went flat, and instead of transferring the gas to my name for my new apartment (like they were supposed to) the gas company turned it off. >=[
So yeah, done ranting… Let’s just say the last few weeks have for sure been winners…please note the sarcasm.
Anywho, please remember to vote. You guys did amazing with votes on the last chapter, and I really do appreciate them. Plus I love to read your comments, so please let me know your thoughts on the chapter as well. =)
Also, this is NOT edited, so hopefully there aren't too many mistakes. =P
Love you guys bunches!
<3 Erin <3