TRIGGER WARNING: cancer, multiple deaths, crying, suicide attempt, sad Bois. Lemme know!
Hahaha love angst. Based on the prompt above.
DRLAMP Platonic
“There used to be six of us…now I’m alone,” Logan told the nurse, staring down at his scrapbook. This all started with one trip, one he’d never forget. Five other people from around the country. They all went to DC, a foundation paid for them to go. He ran his hand down the spine of the book, eyes watery.
She sighed softly. “I know, Logan. It’s horrible what you guys have to go through.” Nurse Anika had been at that hospital since right before Logan started chemo a little over a year before that. Now it’s been one year and three months since the trip. They had grown together, and she had been the one to recommend him go on the trip.
Logan nodded. “Nobody should have cancer,” he mumbled softly. “Especially not them...they didn’t deserve this, Anika…” He opened the book, looking at all the pictures the six had taken together. He remembered each of them well, from the youngest to the oldest.
The first picture was taken when they all arrived to DC in July, to years to the day prior to Logan looking back on it. They all made fun of one another’s accents. In order, left to right, was also youngest to oldest.
Virgil Gray, he was only thirteen when they went on the trip. He was from California, and though he was anxious and shy, eventually opened up. He was funny, talkative when he wanted to be, and very protective of the others, though he was the youngest of the group. He had osteosarcoma, not rare and not normally deadly, unless it spread.
The next oldest was Declan Dolo, or DeDe, from Kansas. He was only fourteen, a few months older than Virgil, and had tried to act as if he didn’t care. He always sat by himself, not talking until the third day, When he started talking, he made up these elaborate stories, but his smile always gave them away as fiction. DeDe would tell the others false tales of their own lives, and they’d laugh about it a lot. He had ALL, or acute lymphoblastic leukemia. It’s one of the most common cancers in children under the age of 18, and he’d actually gone into remission a month before the trip.
Next in line were the fifteen year old twins from New York, Roman and Remus Prince. They were both smiling and hanging on one another, Roman on the left and Remus on the right. Roman had his arm around DeDe and Remus had his around a very reluctant looking Logan. They both had recurring Wilms tumors, and had since they were around three or so. That never stopped the two from acting and singing. Despite their differences, they had only had one another their whole lives, so they were close. The two would put on little performances in the relaxing room the foundation had reserved in the hotel they were staying at.
The next in line was Logan Barry at age sixteen, only one month before turning seventeen. He was looking annoyedly at Remus, but a slight bit of amusement stayed in his eyes. He was from Oklahoma, and had been diagnosed eight months prior with mediastinal grey zone lymphoma. Of all of them, he had the best survival chance. He had six rounds of chemo, then a ton of radiation. He was waiting anxiously until after the trip for the PETscan to tell him it was gone. He had a book under his arm he had been reading on the plane.
The last, and oldest, was Patton Bale from Florida. He was only seventeen when they went, having turned it two months before. He took care of everyone in the group when they all went out, taking especially good care of the youngest. He always had a smile, making sure everyone was ok and happy while they were there. Patton had Non-Hodgkin’s B-Cell lymphoma, having already relapsed twice. He was scheduled for a Bone Marrow Transplant the month after the trip, this being his last big thing before he had to be in the hospital for almost two months.
They had all retired early to bed that night, right after dinner, Logan in a room with Virgil, and DeDe with Patton. Obviously the twins were put together. They had to get up early the next day for sightseeing, they were going to the Washington Monument, and the National Museum of African American History.
Logan looked over at his roommate, smiling gently. He’d learned to be kind to the other kids while he was in the hospital. Seeing the other was in bed, almost asleep, all he said was, “Goodnight, Virgil.” Then Logan went to bed, excited for the next day.
The boy flipped the page, seeing all of them in various pictures from the next day. Logan pointed to one of himself and Patton. He had been explaining the history of the Washington Monument, how tall it was, how old, that sort of thing.
Patton bounced excitedly. “Logan, that’s so cool! How did you know all that?” he asked, looking happy, as usual.
Logan smiled. “I like history. There’s facts and opinions, and history seems to be the only subject in school that has both,” he explained softly. Logan glanced around at everyone else. The twins looked like they were bugging Virgil to talk to them, and the poor kid looked almost ready to cry, he was shaking. DeDe was standing at the railing to a nearby, looking at the monument with a chaperone with him.
The oldest went over to the twins, getting them away from Virgil and helping to calm him down. Logan went over, sighing softly. “Are you alright, Virgil?” he asked gently, and the boy shook his head. As Patton scolded the brothers, Logan worked on calming the group’s youngest.
Logan looked through more pictures, seeing one of them at the DEA, or the Drug Enforcement Administration headquarters. He chuckled, seeing the smallest and youngest of them with a rifle was hilarious now. He ignored the tear that fell from his face to the page.
Virgil, unsurprisingly, was the most anxious to be around guns. All the others really had no problems with it. The group went to the shooting range at the DEA headquarters, and he was shaking a little. Patton kept telling him he’d be ok. After the day before, he had opened up a little to the two oldest, especially Logan. The two had had a long conversation that night about stars and galaxies, which fascinated both of them
“C’mon, kiddo! It’s gonna be fun,” Patton giggled, slowly encouraging Virgil towards the guns. He looked at Logan. “You said you’ve shot a gun before right?”
Logan nodded. “Many times, yes. Do not worry, Virgil, they’ve taken every precaution that they can so we’re safe. Even with Roman and Remus here, you will not get hurt.” He helped lead Virgil to the group with the others, smiling.
“Can you go first?” the youngest asked softly, pointing to the rifles. “I-I wanna do those, but they’re….scary.”
The second oldest chuckled and nodded. “Of course. I’ve shot these a few times before.” Logan went up to the DEA agent that was at the rifles, and he showed Logan how to hold it. The boy shot the gun, around twelve bullets. He sat it down and thanked the agent, looking around. DeDe was at the pistols, Roman with the shotgun, and Remus was at the AR at the end. All three looked like they were having their fun.
Logan went back to Virgil and Patton, smiling softly. “See, Virgil? Perfectly safe.”
The boy smiled as he looked at another picture. Remus and Roman from that night. They had put on a show in the relaxation room, one of a Knight and what they’d called a Dragon Witch. He laughed, remembering they all easily guessed who was who.
“I’ve got you now!” Roman yelled, acting like he was attacking Remus. He got his brother to the floor, laughing as Remus acted dead.
Patton was the first to clap, the other three just shaking their heads. Even DeDe, who had ended up opening up to Patton at lunch that day, was watching with a smile.
“You did amazing, guys!” Patton said happily, helping the two up. The twin bowed and joined the others at the table. They all talked about the day, smiling and laughing.
Logan looked through the rest of the book before sighing softly. “I wish they were still here,” he whispered to the nurse, looking down as he closed the book. He glanced at the day, the reason he’d gotten out the scrapbook Patton had given him. “One year ago today…”
Logan remembered the day well. It had been an amazing day for him. It was senior night, he was happy. It had been a good day, until halftime at the football game. He was headed back to the bandroom after their performance, excited he could go home. He glanced at his phone, at their group chat.
Virgil: guys help
Remus: hey kid what’s wrong?
Virgil: I need you all looking at this please.
After they all responded, Virgil gave the news. Logan stopped as he was walking, checking over his phone around thirty times before he believed it.
Virgil: Patton passed away during his transplant…
Logan couldn’t move. He broke down right then and there, his phone blowing up from the others messaging in it. One of his friends from band stopped, asking him if he was ok. He couldn’t breathe, couldn’t process anything.
The boy sighed softly, his chest still hurt from all the emotions of that he felt that day. None of them were able to go to the funeral, but they had them all on video chat so they could still be there in some way.
Logan sighed, looking at his phone. He pulled up the messages he had gotten only two months after that. Roman and Remus’s parents had grabbed Roman’s phone. They messaged the chat.
Roman: hi boys, we have something to tell you.
Virgil: oh cut the crap Roman, what award did you win? XD
Roman: this is Roman and Remus’s dad. They...passed away not long ago, two days ago actually
DeDe: wait what
DeDe: no
Virgil: nonono this isn’t happening
Virgil: this cant be real please nonono
Logan: oh god…
Roman: i’m really sorry boys…
Logan shook his head as the memories scrambled back to him. They didn’t die of cancer, that’s what made this harder than Patton’s death. They were driving together, having just gotten their licenses. A drunk driver had hit the two front on, killing both on site.
The boy looked at more recent texts. Five months ago. Virgil was the youngest….he didn’t deserve any of this. None of them did. His worst fear came through with a call.
DeDe had been visiting Logan in Oklahoma. The two were out shopping at the mall when DeDe’s phone rang. He chuckled, answering it. “Heya Virgie.”
After a minute of listening, DeDe dropped the phone, falling to the floor. He held himself as Logan sat next to him, grabbing the phone and putting it to his ear. “V-Virgil…?” He was utterly shocked and confused as to what had made DeDe break like that.
“Oh, Logan,” Virgil’s mom said. It was obvious she had been crying. “I was gonna call you when I finished talking with DeDe…” She went on to explain how Virgil’s cancer had spread like wildfire, too fast to catch and treat. She said he didn’t want the others knowing, that he didn’t want them sad.
Logan listened, ignoring everyone staring at him as DeDe sobbed into his shoulder. When she was done he hung up, just holding him tightly. “Shh….he’s ok now, DeDe...he won’t hurt…”
Logan sighed, his eyes finally tearing up as he remembered the call from the day before. The other reason he had a nurse constantly in his room, watching him. Logan held onto Anika, the nurse who had always been there for him.
“DeDe?” Logan asked, it was the middle of the night. He has woken up to his phone ringing, it was only around 3 in the morning.
The voice he heard wasn’t DeDe’s at all. It was his dad. DeDe had been saying he was ok...but he had a relapse. None of them even knew until it was much too late. At least they had a chance to treat Virgil’s….DeDe died within a week of the relapse.
Logan dropped the phone. He was at home, having gotten the news that day of his own going into remission. He was going to tell DeDe the next day, so they could celebrate. Now he’ll never get that chance.
That was how Logan ended up there. A failed suicide attempt, he had tried to hang himself that night. Now he was constantly watched by Anika. Logan sat on the bed with her, crying himself to sleep.
There used to be six of them...now he was alone.