"I mean, you don't even have a boyfriend yet!"
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"Who da Wenny–Benny boy? You da Wenny–Wenny–Benny–Benny boy. Yes" Monica took Ben out of his carseat and bounced him in her lap, but he started to cry. "Oh, don't cry. Don't cry." She tried to comfort him, but nothing was working. "Why is he still crying?" She glanced back at us, holding a crying Ben in her lap.
"Let me hold him for a sec. There you go." Ross pulled his son into his arms. "Huh? Huh? There we are." Ben stopped crying.
"Maybe it's me." Monica let out a slightly nervous chuckle.
"Don't be silly. Ben loves you." Ross rocked him back and forth. "He's just being Mr. Cranky Pants." He replied.
"You know, I once dated a Miss Cranky Pants. Lovely girl. Kind of moody." Chandler responded.
"There we go. All better." Ross handed Ben back to Monica.
"Oh, there's my little boy." But Ben started to cry once again.
"Can I...uh...see something?" Chandler went over to stand next to Monica. He picked up Ben, who instantly stopped crying. When he held Ben close to Monica, Ben resumed crying.
"Cool." Joey nodded his head and smiled, making me smack his arm.
"He hates me." Monica whined as she got up and stood next to the TV. "My nephew hates me."
"Don't do this. Come on." Joey fed me a bite of his pie that was completely covered in whipped cream, but that's the way we both ate it.
"What if my own baby hates me? What am I going to do then?" Monica thought into the future.
"Hey, do you know how long it's going to be before you actually have to deal with this problem?" Chandler handed me Ben before standing in front of Monica. "I mean, you don't even have a boyfriend yet!" Monica crossed her arms over here chest and gave him a look. "Joey, she does not look fat." Chandler threw Joey under the bus, but everyone knew what he was doing.
"I'll put him down for his nap." I stood up and looked at Ben. "Sleep." I demanded him. He lay his head on my shoulder and closed his eyes. "I did not think that was going to work." I whispered to them before heading into Monica's room. A couple of minutes later, I walked out to see Chandler moving a ball towards and away from Monica while Joey made crying and baby noises.
"That is so funny." She laughed with them before taking the ball and throwing it out the window. All of a sudden, Ross started making funny noises.
"You okay, Ross?" I put my hand on his shoulder.
"I don't know, ugh...what's in this pie?" He looked up at Monica.
"I–I don't know. Um, butter, eggs, flour, lime, kiwi..." She listed off on her fingers.
"Kiwi? Kiwi?" He stuttered out while having a hard time swallowing. "You said it was a key lime pie." He dropped his fork.
"No, I didn't. I said kiwi lime." She clarified. "That's what makes it so special."
"That's what's going to kill me. I'm allergic to kiwi." He stood up slowly.
"Ross, no, you're not. You're allergic to lobster and peanuts and...oh my God." She covered her mouth in realization.
"It's definitely getting worse." His tongue started to swell up with the allergic reaction.
"Suparna, you're in charge of the guys and the baby." Monica called out before she and Ross left for the hospital.
"What do we do, boss?" Chandler and Joey looked at me.
"Alright." I let out a deep breath. "Someone make me or get me food, and the other has to help me with the bottle." I instructed them. Chandler grabbed my keys and headed out the door to get us some food. This left me and Joey alone.
"Do you know how sexy you look with a baby in your arms?" Joey pulled me to him by my waist.
"No, I don't know. Want to remind me?" I raised my eyebrows. He smiled and brought me in for a long and passionate kiss. After Chandler came back, I fed Ben his bottle while we ate. Once we finished, the four of us headed out for a walk.
"You know, I don't think we brought enough stuff." Chandler called out to me. "Did you forget to pack the baby's anvil?" I rolled my eyes.
"Men like women holding babies. It apparently makes them look sexier." I winked at Joey. "Now, how sexy do I look?" I pretended to pose with Ben in my arms.
"So sexy." Joey nodded his head but stopped when Chandler turned to look at him. "Not. So not sexy." Joey quickly added.
"Thanks." I pretended to be upset. "I really need a boyfriend. I just want to have these little babies crawling around." I held Ben close into me. "My uterus is skipping beats." We were walking down the street, and a couple of random guys were smiling at me. Chandler stopped when a woman approached him.
"I think I'm ready to talk about having kids, baby." Joey whispered into my ear.
"J–Joe, we haven't even had sex together yet." I said to him quietly, our eyes watching Chandler.
"Maybe our first time could be our wedding night. At our honeymoon." He replied.
"God, I want to take you right now." I shivered at the thought of being with Joey.
"And I want you all the time." He pressed a kiss to the side of my head in my hair. We pulled away when Chandler walked back to us.
"We have received our first number." Chandler held up the small piece of paper. We were taking a bus since Chandler decided to follow a girl in. I leaned my head against the back of my seat while I dosed off for a bit. When I woke up, I saw that neither of the guys were there, and I was alone on the bus with Ben. With his carseat in my arms, I headed to the front.
"Excuse me, hi, where are we?" I cleared my throat and asked the bus driver.
"Upper Eastside." He replied. My heart literally stopped when I heard him say that.
"Please tell me this bus goes back to Greenwich Village." I muttered, but he clearly heard me.
"No, but if you get off on the next stop, another bus'll come to take you down there." He kindly reassured me and put my worries to a rest.
"Thank you very much, sir." I said gratefully before heading back to my seat. Once I got home, Ben was completely attached to me. I tried to put him into his carseat, but he would immediately start crying. So I had the diaper bag and the carseat in one hand while I carried Ben in the other. After a couple hours, we finally got to Monica's apartment. When I did, Joey and Chandler immediately came to my side and hugged me and Ben.
"Oh my God!" Chandler let out a clear sigh of relief.
"We were so worried about you two." Joey looked into my eyes. Chandler tried to take Ben out of my arms, but the infant had an ironclad grip on my shirt.
"He and I grew very, very close in the past four hours." I put down the other things before heading over to the couch. Ben snuggled into my chest on top of me for his nap while the boys sat on either side of us.
"You look dead." Chandler scanned my face.
"That's what every woman wants to hear. So how did we get completely abandoned and forgotten about on the bus?" I smirked at them.
"Chandler chased after the girl, and I chased after him. I thought you followed us out with Ben." Joey explained to me.
"I was in the Upper Eastside when I woke up from my nap." I let out a groan.
"Why don't you go back into Rachel's room and sleep for a bit with Ben." Joey rubbed my back.
"Sounds great." I stood up and headed into her room. A couple of minutes later, I heard the door open then close again. I looked back to see Joey by the bed.
"Your brother headed over to his apartment for something work related. I thought I could nap with you guys." He looked down at his shoes. "I'm really sorry again. I promise you, I wasn't running after another girl." He reassured me.
"Joey, we never made ourselves exclusive. It–It's fine if you go out with someone else." I stuttered out. I obviously wanted him all to myself.
"No. Because I know if I let you go out with some other guy, I would kill him." He sat down on the edge of the bed. "Why don't we make ourselves exclusive? No other guys or girls. Just us." He said to me.
"Perfect." I smiled at him tiredly. He leaned down and pecked my lips. He got on Ben's other side so the infant couldn't roll out of bed. Joey draped his arm over my waist, and I place my hand on his chest. We fell asleep together.