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"Oh, Mommy! Oh, Daddy! I am a big old baddy!"
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"Joey!" I called out to my boyfriend with a whine.
"Yes, dear?" He peeped his head through the door.
"Everything hurts." I groaned and rolled over onto my stomach.
"I don't see what the problem is with having a baby. I mean, we would be forced to have sex just to get rid of your period for let's say...nine months. I think that's a win–win situation." He winked at me.
"But the pain that comes at the end of those nine months is worse than a kick in the guy's you–know–where." I sat up against the headboard.
"But afterwards, you get to take care of another life for eighteen years. It sounds so great." He climbed into the bed and sat down next to me.
"If it'll make you happy, I'll get a ovulation test to figure out what days I'm fertile." I looked over at him.
"That's a great idea." He pressed his lips against mine. "Now...what does my girl need? Some chocolate? Movies? A lot of Chinese takeout?" He listed out.
"Uh, all of the above. Plus cuddles." I pouted slightly. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my cheek.
"Anything for you." He gave me one last squeeze before getting up to get my necessities. After all of that, I headed over to Monica's apartment since Joey had to go for work. Everyone else had the same idea, apparently, so we just lounged around and waited for Monica to come back.
"Hello, people who do not live here." Monica greeted me, Joey, Chandler, Phoebe, and Ross.
"Hi. Hello." The five of us waved at her.
"I gave you guys keys for emergencies." She enunciated.
"We were out of Doritos." Phoebe replied the same way.
"Hey, how'd the date go with Mr. Millionaire?" Ross asked his little sister.
"'Mr. Millionaire, new from Snooty Playthings'." Chandler joked.
"'Third wife sold separately'." He and I high–fived after I finished his joked.
"He's great." She took off her coat and set down her purse before coming over to us. "I mean, we have such a good time together. He's so funny and so sweet, and I'm not attracted to him at all." She exclaimed in frustration.
"Still?" Ross groaned.
"No!" Monica stomped her foot. "It's driving me crazy. I mean, in every other way, he's like the perfect guy. He has everything. Plus, he actually has everything." She emphasized.
"Life–sized imperial Stormtroopers from Sharper Image?" Chandler questioned.
