❝What is mine is only mine.
And I'm ready to kill for it.❞
RE-WRITTEN
(3/10/20)
EDIT:
I feel like I have to say this before the story actually begins and some of you guys start complaining because I always see these types of comments in the very first chapter.
I intentionally made (Y/N) an unsympathetic character. They're not supposed to be written in this chapter as if they're a girlboss or a bad bitch because I'm aware that acting like an asshole is not something someone should be proud of.
Yes, they're rude but that's the point. Right off the bat, you should know that everything (Y/N) will go through as you progress through the story should make you think that they deserve it.
Yes, they develop as the story goes on but it's still up to you to think if they redeemed themselves by the end of the story or not. Do they actually deserve it despite you thinking that they do?
I personally think it's my fault for making them too unlikeable in this chapter, but I do promise you that the longer you keep reading, the more (Y/N) becomes tolerable.
Thank you for understanding and enjoy reading!
»»----- ♡ -----««
I woke up to the sound of my phone's alarm blaring through my room in a high volume. With a small groan escaping my chapped and dry lips, I twist and turn around my twin-sized bed before reaching towards the nightstand where my phone was located.
When I felt the gadget around my hands, I drag it towards me with the sound of the alarm now making me want to throw this phone across the room for being too noisy.
As my (E/C) eyes squinted groggily, I let my finger navigate around the screen to turn this blasted alarm off.
Once the alarm was turned off, I let out a sigh of relief before dropping my phone to the side and sitting up from the bed.
"Ugh, why do I need to go to school anyway?" I murmur tiredly while rubbing and scratching my eyes, yawning in the process before grabbing my phone, standing up and dragging my tired legs over to the kitchen.
My body is still yearning for sleep but I immediately told my brain to deal with it as I didn't want to be late for school.
I don't want to fidget and walk outside the classroom anxiously while waiting for the teacher to get out of the classroom so I can finally step inside and save myself the shame and embarrassment of being late.
Once I reached the kitchen, I scroll through my phone to play my playlist and placed it on the dining table.
Owl City's "Fireflies" played through my phone's speaker as I started to brew myself a cup of warm coffee so I can start my day without looking like a dead zombie that crawled out from the ground.
Although I already look like that every day.
When I made my way to the sink, I stared at the mountain of dishes, glasses and bowls that I didn't get to wash last night for a moment.
I tell myself that I'll just wash them after I get back from school as I turned the faucet on and washed my hands, letting the cold waters run down to my palms and my knuckles.
The coldness of the water almost snapped me awake but when I turned the faucet off, my body went back to its tired state.
"I'd like to make myself believe," I sang while brewing my coffee and cooking myself up a light breakfast, consisting of jam sandwich and two sunny side up eggs. "That planet Earth turns slowly." I continued, placing my cup of coffee on the table before setting my attention to my cooking eggs.
"It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep," I turn the stove off and grabbed a clean plate from my dish rack. "'Cause everything is never as it seems," With the spatula, I gently placed the eggs on the plate and set them on the table.
"When I fall asleep." After making my jam sandwich, I take myself a seat at the table while singing along to Fireflies.
If there wasn't any music at all, I'd cringe at how weird and off-key my voice sounds like so I just sing along to the singer so, at least, I wouldn't hear my shitty voice.
As I ate by myself, I glance over at the empty seat across the table. For some reason, I always find myself staring at the empty seat as if I expect that someone is going to sit there.
I wanted to move the chair away so I don't have to keep reminding myself that I'm alone but my hopeful self didn't want me to.
Without any words leaving my mouth, I continued to eat in silence while the loneliness in my heart grew but I know that I can't do anything about it.
I sigh in defeat as "when the party's over" began to play on my phone.
»»----- ♡ -----««
"Have you finished your homework yet?"
"Yeah, I'm surprised that I managed to finish it, to be honest."
"Cool. Can I copy? I was too busy last night."
"Go fuck yourself."
I increased the volume of my song without giving a damn that it'll destroy my hearing. I think my hearing's already been destroyed after hearing my classmates say a bunch of stupid shit all the time.
I arranged the position of my earphones for a moment before I continue to scroll through my phone, reading some Harry Potter fanfictions that I find interesting and seem to be original.
I've had enough of reading Harry Potter fanfictions that either has;
The MC be Lily's sister, Harry's sister, Voldemort's daughter or- yeah, you get the idea.
Also, what's up with some fan fictions saying that the MC lives in America yet still receive a Hogwarts letter despite Hogwarts being in UK?
Like, is there Hogwarts in America or something?
"Hey, (Y/N)." I heard someone call my last name so I looked up from my phone.
When I saw that it was one of my classmates, Louis, I removed one earbud from my ear, indicating that I'm listening to what he has to say.
"Yeah?"
"Did you finish your homework?" Louis flushed, casting his green eyes somewhere else.
"Yeah. I'm not going to let you copy so don't even ask." My eyes became half-lidded but Louis immediately flicked his eyes towards mine, a look of surprise and fluster visible on his freckled features.
"N-No! I-I was about to let you c-copy mine if you haven't finished it yet." He exclaimed while rubbing his neck bashfully.
He's always obvious, I thought to myself.
Not that I'm interested in him though.
But I am interested about how he feels about me. Not everyone really bothers to talk to me or even have some sort of feelings for me so Louis liking me...
Well, I don't really know how to respond to that.
With a fake smile curling up at the corner of my lips, I place my head on the palm of my hand.
"Really? I was going to let you copy mine if you haven't finished yours so I guess we both feel the same way, huh?" I scoff playfully as I found myself feeling nothing but contempt to Louis as he started to panic and blush heavily because of what I just said.
Nothing, there's still nothing.
I close my eyes for a moment, pursing my lips in frustration and lifting my head up from the palm of my hand.
If you can't bring yourself to get me to feel the same way, then don't waste my time.
I have no use for people like you.
"D-Do you maybe want to go to McDonald's later? My treat, of course." Louis stuttered as my eyes travelled down to his fingers, who were crossed in hopes of getting me to say yes to his pathetic offer.
I give him a gentle smile and although it'd be fun to buy everything from the McDonald's menu just to make Louis broke, I felt like it's unnecessary considering he's irrelevant to me.
Anyone who shows a half-baked effort when it comes to love is worth nothing to me.
"I'm sorry but I have plans for tonight. My mother is coming back from overseas, you see and I need to be on the airport by 5 pm. Maybe some other time." I gently rejected his offer with a lie that I managed to come up with ever since I stepped in this godforsaken school.
The lie that my mother is still living with me.
The lie that I'm not alone and as pathetic as people think I am.
If anything, the only thing I'll be doing tonight is binge-watch Harry Potter and browse r/harrypotter right after my shift in 7-eleven.
I'm living alone so I need to get some cash so I won't be living in the streets.
"O-Oh," Louis' smile dropped but he still smiled nonetheless, "It's fine. Let's just hang out some other time then." He said before giving me a short wave of goodbye and heading over to his seat where a few of my female classmates are waiting for him so they could strike up a conversation with him.
I roll my eyes at this as I placed my earbud back on and continued to read the Harry Potter fanfiction. I wouldn't be surprised if he ended up to be a hardcore player and I'm just one of his targets.
Make sense why I don't feel an ounce of interest for this boy.
I hope he stays the fuck away from me soon.
Good thing that there's no class tomorrow so I won't be able to see his face for two days, at least.
»»----- ♡ -----««
I yawned as I stared at the seemingly empty 7-eleven aisles while consistently hoping that my shift is over already however, judging from the clock that's positioned right on top of the entrance way, it'll be 2 hours before my shift is over.
"Maybe I should look for some other jobs instead." I murmured, itching to grab my phone from my pocket and just browse the Harry Potter Wikipedia for some Harry Potter information that I can forcefully stuff inside my brain.
But my manager will probably catch me and then scold me for an hour before letting me go home and her voice is annoying enough as it is.
She's Dolores Umbridge but wears red all the time.
The doors opened as a cheerful ding indicated that a customer entered the store. A girl and a boy walked inside, laughing and holding hands tightly.
My eyeballs nearly back flipped itself towards my brain but I held myself back when they stopped laughing and started to get whatever the fuck they're going to buy.
The boy has a messy curled hair that's dyed green. He looks like he hasn't been fixing his hair for days. He also wore some black piercings and an oversized grey sweater with black jeans and white converse sneakers.
I didn't really bother to pay attention to his facial features because judging from the way he looks, I can definitely tell what kind of a person he is.
The girl also dyed her hair with gradient pink and violet. I half expected her to wear black clothes but to my surprise, she's wearing a green pastel shirt that said "trash" in it and blue skinny jeans.
She looks like a typical soft 'uwu' girl but is definitely kind of rebellious in a way.
When the two approached the cashier, they placed their products on the counter as they continued to talk to each other with a smile etched on their faces.
I can feel envy surfacing in my emotions as I glanced over at the couple with half-lidded eyes while checking their item out.
You lucky bastards, I thought to myself in hate.
"Oh yeah," The boy spoke and turned his head towards me. "Do y'all serve popcorn here?" He asked and I found myself being dumbfounded by his question.
Although he probably meant something else, I'm still shocked as to why he asked something like that.
"Sir, does this look like the cinema to you?" I cock my eyebrow upward. His smile dropped slightly when he heard my words and my dumbfounded tone as if I find him to be completely ridiculous.
Well, which I do.
"I meant like those flavors and those little seed things that you just need to cook and all that stu-"
"Yes sir, I know what you mean. It's in the snacks aisle." I cut him off, staring at him with a deadpan look while he just narrows his eyes at me.
The girl is just looking at us with a nervous expression before she forced a nervous laugh and grabbed her boyfriend by his arm.
"W-We'll go and take it. Could you please hold on to our items for a while?" The girl's soft voice almost made my contempt for this two disappear.
All I could do is node and say "sure" as they walked away and whispered hushed words to each other.
Probably talking about how rude I am but I couldn't really care less. I just want to go home and do whatever I want to do without associating myself with these kinds of people.
"Hey, (Y/N)!" My manager approached me with a wave and a smile that's always prominent on her face.
I groggily drifted my attention towards my manager but if I kept a tired expression on my face, I might receive another annoying sermon from her so I managed to force a small smile to tell her that I'm fine.
"Hey." I briefly acknowledged her annoying presence as she stopped in front of me.
"I just remembered; you can go home early for tonight since your mother's coming back and I don't want to be held responsible for letting her child work while she's waiting for you in your home." She giggled while arranging her uniform and placing her hands on her hips like a typical strong anime girl.
I almost scoffed at this but held myself back.
"Are you sure? I can always tell my mom that I need to work until my shift's finished." I cock my eyebrow up with a fake surprised tone.
Of course, she nodded and gently pushed me away from the cashier.
"Yes, I'm sure!" She said while glancing over at the items that I held for a while until those idiotic couples come back.
"Tell Mrs. (L/N) that I said 'hi', alright?" My manager made a dumb thumbs up while I just smiled with a nod and as I went to grab my school bag.
"Oh," I suddenly remembered and turned to face my manager, "Can I get some chips and a soda?" I asked, taking out my wallet so I can immediately pay for it without having to go to grab the two items and back to the cashier.
"It's in the house, (Y/N)! Let your mom taste the flavor of Lays and Pepsi!"
»»----- ♡ -----««
I began to walk out of the store with an annoyed frown etched on my face. I inserted the plastic bag inside my bag so I don't have to deal with the hassle of getting to hold a plastic bag.
"Don't talk to me as if you're so damn close to me, idiot." I mumble while plugging my earphones on my phone and playing my usual playlist before tucking my phone inside my pocket while my heavy ass backpack is just hanging from my back.
"You're already holding a ton of responsibility for being such a shitty manager." Clicking my tongue, I turn into a corner as I kept walking towards my own home. I don't want to bother getting a taxi since it's just a 10 minute walk away.
Why should I waste money on something that I can just do for free?
Besides, I need to save up.
My mind drifted into the cheerful faces of those two and my manager, making me frown slightly due to the fact that they're actually genuinely happy with what they have in their lives right now.
While here I am, 18 years old yet I'm still unhappy with a lot of things.
I have no family, I'm living alone, I don't bother to associate myself with other people because they're annoying and I lie to everyone who I talk to because I don't want them to think that I'm pathetic.
Unfortunately, I haven't done the same thing when I was in middle school so that resulted into me being an outcast and labelled as an 'out of control' teenager.
But, I didn't have any regrets beating my classmates up for teasing me about not having a mother and I'm actually just a whore's child.
They deserved it, why should I apologize?
It was only then I realized that not everyone will bother to understand you or let themselves get down to your level just to know where you're coming from.
They're too entitled to make everyone know that they're better than anyone else and if you have the slightest flaw when it comes to your life, you're immediately cast as a nobody.
Just nothing but a problematic pile of chaos and disorder.
So if they can't let themselves understand me, I'll just coat myself with lies that I made up about myself so I wouldn't be pitied and someone who needed help. Someone who actually has something interesting in their life.
Someone who, still, isn't missing something important in their life.
If being entitled is how the world works now, then I have no problems with silently degrading everyone else. They're nothing to me.
But, I don't want to step down on their level of being a complete asshole and publicly question anyone who's underneath them about their worth. I'm not that kind of person, not at all.
Well, at least, not publicly.
I've learned to deal everything that's making my life shit to be normal. It always happens to me every single day that I'm starting to get bored.
Nothing ever interesting happens anymore.
Instead of being a cheerful teenager that's about to live as a young adult, I'm just here questioning if my life will get any better from here.
I'm just living with the feeling of emptiness growing stronger than ever and I desperately needed something that can make my life feel like it has any worth at all.
And what's better than making my life know that it's worth something by gaining and experiencing the strongest emotion there is?
Which is love.
Everyone needs love. Everyone gains love at some point in their lives, whether from relationships or families or from friends.
But I have neither of those.
The only other thing that gives me a sense of fantasy, love and interest is Harry Potter. There's just something about the magical world that draws me in to it and just watching fictional characters go in this adventure with their friends make you feel like you're also following them in their adventure.
Which is why I love it so much.
It makes me feel like I'm in an adventure and I can feel what the characters are feeling, almost as if I'm actually interacting with them.
Who cares if it's a false sense of adventure? If I can still get some fun out of it, why not take it?
I can find myself smiling genuinely or even exclaiming loudly sometimes while reading and watching Harry Potter. If it can make me smile, even the tiniest bit, then it's absolutely worth it to sell a piece of my soul to it.
I took my phone out of my pocket to change the music since I don't feel like listening to Heathens right now.
The next song that came on was "Happy Now" by Zedd.
I shrugged and placed my phone back inside my pocket since the song isn't that bad for me to listen to right now.
In the corner of my eye, I can see a random person with an orange colored hoodie walking towards me. They had their hood up and from the darkness of the street, it's completely covering their face as well.
I silently scoff and drifted my eyes away from them, thinking that they might be some sort of a drug dealer that lurks around this area and offering drugs to random high school students.
"Hey, miss/mister." I heard the random hoodie person say. I turned around curiously and slightly panicking because they might want to sell me some drugs.
"Are you talking to me?" I ask as my grip on my backpack begin to tighten due to caution. I don't want to deal with random drug hippies.
"Duh, who else is here? Only you, right?" They laugh while I almost get this feeling of wanting to slap the fuck out of this guy.
"I thought you were talking to your imaginary friends. You know, with all the drugs that you're taking." I replied to his question and his laugh eventually faded, making me feel somewhat anxious again.
Did I offend them?
Eventually, they opened their mouth after a minute of silence or so.
"You should really be careful of what you wish for, miss/mister. Trust me," Their tone eventually became sad and quite pitiful, to be honest.
I can just feel the regret and guilt from them as they pulled their hood lower, careful not to let their face be seen by the light from the street lamp.
"Because I've been living with the consequences from those wishes I selfishly asked for." They turn around and tucked both of their hands inside their orange hoodie before walking off with their slouched posture disappearing into the dark.
I stood there for a moment, staring at the same spot where the hoodie person disappeared into before I snapped back into reality and continued walking towards my home.
I narrowed my eyes confusingly as the grip on my bag loosened, indicating that I was finally at ease.
"...what a weird person." I murmur, picking up my pace so I wouldn't have to run into a random person again. I've had enough of interaction with weirdos this day.
»»----- ♡ -----««
I inserted my key to my door before slowly opening it, revealing the darkness that resides in my house after being gone for an entire day.
I let my hand travel through the walls situated at the right side of the doorway until I felt a light switch on the tip of my fingers.
As I flipped the light switch on, I groan tiredly and let myself enter my messy abode, closing the door and then locking it in the process.
I suddenly remembered that my 'mother' is supposed to come home tonight so I scoff playfully while throwing my bag on the couch and sloppily slipping my school shoes off of my feet.
"Hey, mom! I'm home!" I jokingly yelled but it sounds really pathetic; calling out to my, presumably, dead mother at a house where I'm currently living alone.
Being the pathetic person I am, I chuckle at my joke before dragging my feet over to the kitchen.
My eyes drifted over towards the dirty plates that I didn't get to wash this morning. I stared at it for a moment before promising myself that I'll wake up early tomorrow so I have time to wash the plates.
As I opened the fridge, I immediately scan the insides until my eyes landed on a container full of spaghetti.
This spaghetti was given to me by my neighbor yesterday since it was her birthday and she had extras so she gave it to the me and the other tenants.
Since I was too lazy to even heat it up, I just grabbed the cold container of the spaghetti and a fork before heading towards my room.
I set the container and the fork on the table for a moment to grab my laptop and turn it on, browsing through my Harry Potter file and choosing the first film, which is the Philosopher's Stone.
I'm up for a Harry Potter marathon since there's no class tomorrow,
and there's no better way to get through the weekends except being immersed in a fictional and magical world that makes you feel like you're in an adventure with the other characters.
Once I hit play, I adjust myself on the bed, placing the laptop on my stomach and feeling the warm temperature from underneath the laptop as I grabbed my spaghetti and fork, ready to eat and ready to watch.
»»----- ♡ -----««
"Yes, Neville! You're a fucking pro!" I scream, pumping my fists up in the air in celebration of Neville beheading Nagini, Voldemort's last horcrux with my hoarse voice from all of the screaming I did during the duration of the marathon.
I watched as Voldemort turned into dust, his ashes disappearing and being blown away as his desperate red eyes seemed like his life was flashing through his eyes.
I could see a faint transition of his red eyes to his original dark brown ones but I didn't bother to confirm as he was already gone.
In a way, I pitied him and somewhat sympathized with him. I think I already know the answer why but I didn't say anything else as I continued watching and slightly caught myself being teary eyed while "Leaving Hogwarts" plays in the ending.
It made me feel like I was actually watching the golden trio and all of these characters watch their children go to Hogwarts as well, waving them goodbye and making them remind themselves that they, too, were once children who went to the school that changed their lives for the better.
"It's still as emotional as the first time I saw it." I softly smiled but it immediately dropped when the low battery notification flashed through my screen.
WARNING
Battery is below 10%. Please connect to a charger.
"Ah fuck." I hissed silently while stumbling out of my messy bed to grab the hanging charger from my drawer near the door.
I immediately ran back to the laptop and inserted the charger on the charging pin and then plugged the adaptor to the plug on the wall.
I sighed in relief once I saw that the laptop is now charging and that it's not going to forcefully shut itself down. This laptop is old so if I forcefully shut itself down, it might not turn itself on anymore.
As I ruffled my messy hair, I flicked my eyes over towards the time and laughed once I saw that it's already 1 PM.
I stayed up all night and morning just to finish the entire movies but I didn't have any regrets.
I needed that rush of excitement that I can only get from Harry Potter after all.
I smile softly, setting the laptop aside while being cautious as to not accidentally unplug the charger before plopping myself to my bed, staring up to my cream colored ceiling.
The feeling of emptiness returned but I didn't do anything except bring my arm over to my eyes and rest my other arm over to my stomach, ready to sleep these feelings off and this day off after a day of marathon.
I suddenly remembered what that weirdo said last night; something about "be careful what you wish for".
I scoff then turned myself over, thinking that if the wish is truly what I desire then there's no problem with taking the risk that came along with it.
I want to feel love, I want to be loved and I want to feel the same rush of happiness and sense of adventure that I can get from the magical world of Harry Potter.
Call me insane but I wouldn't mind giving all of this up just to have a chance to live in a world like that.
It's, at least, better than staying in a world where no one really wants you to be in.
"If there was a way for me to be in that world, if there was a way for me to realize that life isn't what I expect it to be; bleak, boring and unfair, then I'll take it. I don't mind wishing for something like that." I murmur, feeling myself getting drowsy and my eyes burning due to the fact that I stayed up late watching 8 movies straight without a break.
In a few seconds, I was knocked out.
I didn't even notice that it was raining outside.
»»----- ♡ -----««
"You know," A loud, echoing voice snapped me out of my sleepy state that I sat up almost instantaneously.
I expected to feel the texture of my bed on my fingers but to my surprise, I felt nothing but cold, hard ground.
"You're the type of person who doesn't seem to mind the consequences as long as you get what you want, like what a selfish person would do." I gulped, looking around and seeing nothing but absolute darkness that it's starting to scare me.
I can't even see the owner of that voice around this darkness.
"And believe it or not," When I felt a presence behind me, I pursed my lips for a moment before turning around to see who was talking to me through this freaky ass dream.
"It usually leads to their demise and it makes them wish that they didn't get what they wanted, desperately crawling out from the despair that they created themselves." A random child-looking figure smiled, tucking their hands on their hoodie's pockets.
I felt my eyes widen once I recognized the familiar orange hoodie that this figure wore. I glanced up to their face and saw their child-like features.
They had short, strawberry blonde hair, almost resembling like a bob cut. They wore red jogging pants and worn out orange sneakers.
"Nice to meet you, (Y/N)." Their smile widened but I stood up, stumbling for a moment before making myself sure what their gender actually is.
I don't want to assume anything so I just didn't say anything about their gender.
"H-Hold on, where am I?" I look around once more.
"Well, just like what you think it is, in the middle of nowhere in a dream. You could say that you're lucid dreaming right now." They answered with a shrug. "You do know what lucid dreaming is, right?"
"Who are you? Why are you speaking as if... you know everything that's happening right now?" I ignored their question, facing them with a frantic look on my face.
"I don't have a name. Just call me whatever you want and to answer your question, that's because I'm actually the one who brought you here." They began to jump around, playing with themselves like this is a completely normal situation.
"I did hear and feel your desire of wanting to change something in your life and to be able to feel that strong emotion that everybody wants; love." Hoodie said as I internally choked on my spit. I didn't actually expect it to be this real.
I thought this kind of stuff only happens in books and movies, making desires and wishes come true that it's ridiculous.
"Let me ask you this question then, (Y/N);" They stopped jumping around, disappearing into nothingness and leaving me alone in this dark place.
"Do you really hate your normal life?" Hoodie's voice echoed around the space once more and once that question came out of their mouth, I looked down to the black ground as if I'm staring into nothingness.
"I wouldn't have asked for something like that if I didn't, right?" I mumble but when I heard Hoodie's laugh, I assume that they must've heard my answer.
I didn't intend for it to be rude, of course.
"Well, that's true considering that you're willing to throw everything away just to be able to achieve your desires." They said. "Commendable but very dangerous."
"But if you really want to escape, I can let you stay in the magical world that you always wanted to be a part of." Hoodie suddenly appeared in front of me that I shrieked and stumbled back in surprise.
They didn't laugh or anything but their creepy, unending smile stayed on their face.
"I'm not escaping-"
"(Y/N), we both know that someone who is willing to abandon their previous life and is frustrated that they can't feel the same emotion of love that they felt when they were a child is the same as escaping everything else for the sake of their selfish desires." Hoodie's smile faded as they began to stare at me sternly and intently, almost egging me to refute what they said.
"And if love and a new life is what you truly desire, I'll be able to give that to you. Of course, there are consequences but like you said, you wouldn't care, would you?" I give them a look of perplexity and skepticism, wondering how the hell can they even do something like that.
"What I want from you," They pointed towards me, "is your unnaturally high desire and infatuation for this magical world that you want to be in." Hoodie tucked their hand back inside their hoodie pocket.
"By doing something as a trigger to those emotions, that dangerously high infatuation will be reciprocated to the people around you and they won't do anything but love you." They said which made me bite the insides of my cheek.
"...that's not the kind of love that I want." I said, rubbing my arm worriedly.
"But it is what you asked for. Either you take it or not, it's your choice but just know that I don't do anything without a price." They said.
Both of us were silent for a moment until I spoke up.
"What happens if I die?" I ask as I began to worry and eyeing Hoodie with a concerned look. They don't look as worried as I do but that's understandable, considering that this is more on me than it is for them.
"You die in real life as well. Remember that all of it is still just a dream, nothing about it is real however death in the dream will also bring the death of you in real life." Hoodie replied to my question which made me look back to the dark ground, thinking if I should just accept this offer.
If I accept, I get what I want and I can have that sense of adventure that I've always wanted.
But then again, if I accept, I am risking and abandoning everything I have, even my boring life.
Why am I hesitating? Isn't this what I want?
Suddenly, memories of my childhood self watching my parents get into fights entered my mind, beating other children which causes them to stay away from me and my torn up stuffed doll left to the ground while my dad just walked away with my mother crying to the ground then eventually fading away into dust as if I've repressed those memories for so long and they're only there to remind me the painful things I've went through when I was only a small child.
With a hint of determination glinting through my (E/C) eyes and a push of courage in my heart, I purse my lips and then nod, accepting their offer.
Hoodie wasn't phased with my decision and didn't say anything else except walk towards me with their footsteps ringing in the suddenly silent place.
"One thing I forgot to mention," They said as they placed their hand on my forehead.
"If you can't manage to bring, at least one person, to be infatuated with you by the end of the first year, I need to kill you myself as it is against my contract to fulfill anyone's desire without a price. I die if I do." Hoodie warned as I felt a strange, painful flash go through my eyes for a moment while I was thinking of what the trigger to those infatuated emotions might be.
All of a sudden, I felt my eyelids drop and my body getting lighter. It felt like I was falling down to a never ending abyss and when I wanted to reach out and scream for help, my body and my voice wouldn't oblige.
Fear began to rise up on my throat and I suddenly imagined how it'd be if I fell down to the ground. I couldn't even breathe anymore.
It wasn't until I felt my body falling down in a slow pace, as if it was in slow motion.
"Good luck, (Y/N)."
»»----- ♡ -----««
"(Y/N)?" A voice snapped me back into reality. I look beside me and saw someone who looked a lot like me, almost as if we were twins though he had more masculine features.
"Geez, you've been spacing out a lot since we got inside the train." He sighed as he took his book out and read it with such immersion. I look out into the window of the train that we were on.
Multiple terrains and trees passed us by almost instantaneously as I pursed my lips together in confusion.
How did I get inside a train?
I turned my head back towards the boy next to me. I assume that he's my brother but I've never had a brother before.
"Hey," He looks up from his book and looks at me with confusion and one eyebrow raised. "Um, excuse me for asking such a weird question but uh..." I scratch my head, obviously going to regret what I'm going to say next.
"Who are you, what is this train, why am I on this train and how am I related to you?" I asked, pointing to him, pointing to the floor of this train and pointed towards myself.
His face scrunched up in confusion as he placed his book down on his lap.
"What the hell? Did you hit your head or something?" He asked, immediately backing himself away from me towards the edge of the train seat.
"Come on, sis/bro. You know, I don't like jokes like that!" My 'brother' exclaimed, huffing angrily.
I sweat dropped and shook my head sadly. "A-Actually, I really... don't know who you are..." I look down to the floor, regret immediately lingering over my back.
"(Y/N), please stop joking. I am serious." Just as he said, he does sound serious now. I internally sighed, knowing I won't be able to get answers from him.
Well, what did I even expect?
I look back at him with a strained smile on my face. A nervous laugh came out of my mouth as I scratched the back of my head.
"L-Looks like I got you again, uh... bro!" I exclaimed, internally thanking myself for thinking up 'bro' since I didn't know his name.
His expression didn't change one bit. Instead, he sighed and opened his mouth to speak.
"I'm going to tell Zeke."
I stayed silent for a moment, tilting my head to the side in curiosity.
"Who's Zeke?"
Silence engulfed the compartment for a short while until he pursed his lips as the grip on his book tightened.
"I'm your brother, Alem Rosewood. This is the Hogwarts Train. You're here because you were accepted as a student at Hogwarts, like me. You're my older sister/brother by 10 minutes." He goes back to his usual position earlier and continues to read his book while answering all of the questions I asked earlier.
"Um... did you just--"
"You wouldn't just forget who Zeke is and I can tell if you're lying or not since you do it so badly." Alem answered calmly, flipping another page.
"A-Ah, is that right?" I removed my hand from my nose, looking at Alem with a nervous expression.
I wanted to ask more but I feel like it'll come off as insincere and he won't take me seriously anymore.
"So, what happened to you?" Alem asked. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat and fiddled with my fingers, not knowing what to say to answer Alem's question.
I could lie but I can't even think of anything.
"I... uh..."
"And tell me honestly; like I said, you suck at lying so don't even try." He stole a glance towards my surprised expression before looking back on his book.
"I... don't remember, actually..." I answered honestly, considering that lying is completely out of the question. He's my little brother but he's darn smart.
Makes me feel bad about myself.
"You don't remember? Are you telling me that you've been Obliviated?" Alem's eyes widened, placing his full attention back to me. I tilt my head to the side in confusion.
"Obliviated?" I asked like a lost puppy looking for its owner. Alem's eyes narrowed at this.
"(Y/N), this is not a goddamn joke. I know that you fully know what Obliviate is." He slams his book down to the train seat as he raised his voice.
I slightly yelped and waved my hands around, starting to sweat nervously.
"I-I'm not joking! I really don't know what it means!"
"We've been practicing Obliviate since we got our Hogwarts letter, (Y/N)... Are you telling me that you forgot all of that?"
"It's not like I forgot all of it. It's just that I didn't even know that happened..." Another moment of silence loomed over our entire compartment.
The only thing that we could hear at the moment were the constant bickering of other people in other compartments and the sound of the train moving rapidly.
"Let's just get our robes and change, alright? I'm sure you're just hungry." Alem spoke, breaking the suffocating silence as he stood up from his seat and opened his blue colored bag, taking out a working robe that looked like it could fit him perfectly.
"Mom said that there's always a feast after the sorting of the first years. Make sure that you'll eat a lot so I won't have to tell Mom that you're acting weird on the first day." He chuckled, wearing his robe and walked out of the compartment, probably to go to the bathroom or something.
I stared at the palm of my hands, frowning. "Why can't I remember anything?" I ask the question that has been lingering within my mind for a long time now.
But, it really is weird; I can't remember what happened to me, I can't remember Alem, I can't even remember who I am. It really feels surreal.
And why the hell doesn't he believe me?
I sigh, knowing that my questions won't be answered if I keep sitting here like a loser. I stand up and looked at the two luggages sitting at the opposite of our seat.
Considering that Alem opened the blue one, I guess it would be plausible that the (favorite color) one is mine.
I walk over to my bag and zipped it open, revealing a bunch of clothing that I didn't know was mine in the first place.
The first thing I saw when I opened my bag was the neatly folded robe placed on top of my clothes and a black colored wand laying securely beside it.
I took the robe out of the bag and placed them to the side. I glance over at the wand and looked at it curiously.
Is this Alem's or something? But, why would he keep a wand in my bag?
I shoved the thought off and sifted through my bag, looking at everything I supposedly brought with me.
Most of them were oversized hoodies and few sweaters and t-shirts. Pajamas, jogging pants and normal pants sat at the very bottom of the bag.
I zipped the first batch of the bag close and opened the second one which caused me to blush softly at its contents.
I gently zipped it close, pretending that I didn't see anything.
Finally, I zipped the third batch open.
Inside were a bunch of books and a lone (favorite color) colored diary with a bunch of cute stickers littered around the front of it.
I smile at the newfound hope that I managed to find. I could be able to find a little bit about myself through this notebook. A clinking sound was heard when I flipped it over.
I examined it and it had a combination lock at the side of the notebook.
Well of course it wasn't going to be easy.
I grumble, placing the notebook back inside.
The rest of the contents were filled with quills and... a small vial that was filled with bubbling pink colored liquid. I squint at it.
What the hell is this?
There was a note that was attatched to the potion with glittering (favorite color) string. I examined the note and I just grew more confused at the writing inside.
"For Him"
I cringe internally at the realization that I have a crush on someone, probably on that guy named Zeke. Thinking about that makes it feel like I possessed this body or something.
Wait, what if that's the reason why I can't remember anything?
"Huh, you didn't change yet?" Alem's voice caught me off guard and I yelped, almost dropping the vial to the floor.
"Geez, don't scare me like that." I sent him a slight glare, holding the vial close to my chest. Alem's eyes widened and took a step closer to me.
"Are you finally back to normal?"
"...Do you seriously still don't believe me?" I gave him a deadpanned look while he sighed, crossing his arms.
"Sorry, it's just--"
"Did I just do something that I would normally do if you scared me?" Alem nodded with a small hum. I gave him one last glare before holding the vial out for him to see.
"Anyway, do you know what this is? I think I'm supposed to give it to someone but I don't know who." I asked as Alem leaned closer towards the vial.
He gasped loudly and snatched it out of my hands, examining it even closer.
"Did you seriously just create a love potion!? Who were you going to give it to!?" Alem exclaimed while my jaw was hung agape.
That thing was a love potion!?
"That's a love potion!?" I exclaim back, pointing at the potion accusingly.
"Well, yes! Don't tell me you don't know what a love potion is!?"
"The name is pretty self explanatory, Alem! I know what love potions are!" Suddenly, the train started to go slower and eventually, halting to a stop.
Thousands of footsteps rumbled around the train as a bunch of students were piling out of the window.
Alem huffed as he threw the potion back to me.
It was a miracle that I was able to catch it as fast as I could.
"Get changed, sis/bro. I'll wait for you outside the train." Alem smiled before walking out of the compartment with his blue bag slung over his shoulder.
I stared at the potion before tossing it back inside the bag. I zipped it close and walked over to the robe, putting it on.
I had a little bit of trouble since I've never worn something like this before but I managed.
Satisfied, I grabbed my own bag and slung it over my shoulder as I walked out of my own compartment with questions still lingering over my head.
»»----- ♡ -----««
❝I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone.
It's not.
The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone.❞