Shae, Ava, Chimin and Jin: no one said much during the flight back home.
Upon their arrival, Tae, Joon and Jungkook all stood in the shuttle bay to 'greet' them.
Tae and Joon stood like hardened shells with dark eyes, both of them clearly troubled. Joon's jaw was clenched, and Tae's fists.
Jungkook stood between them inside the flight hangar, his eyes shifting and flighty, as if severely distracted from what was happening in front of his face. The sight of Shae coming out of the transport shuttle made his heart beat a little bit faster than normal... but it had nothing to do with attraction. He swallowed. Is now a good time to tell someone? Because this is getting ridiculous....
"What happened?" Tae was the first to find a voice. He noticed Ava's arm laced through Chimin's. Her knees were shaking and her face was pale. Silence. This wasn't play acting. He knew what real fear looked like. He also knew he'd never seen Ava wear it before.
Chimin responded in a calm, careful voice, "Perhaps we should let the ladies retire. They've had quite the day."
Joon said sharply, "I'd like to speak to Shae."
No one knew what to say or do.
Tae came up alongside Ava's other side and he and Chimin began walking with her out of the flight hangar and down the halls of Noon Mool. Tae and Chimin kept speaking in soothing tones to the uncharacteristically quiet Ava as they walked away.
Some instinct in Jungkook said that he couldn't leave yet. He looked from Joon to Jin to Shae.
"Let's at least talk inside," Jin said, a twinge of nervousness in his voice. The four of them exited the hangar and entered a side lounge just down the hallway.
Joon had been pondering the hundreds of different ways that he was going to tear Jin apart as soon as he got back to base. He'd even rolled up the sleeves of his dress shirt, as if prepared to strike Jin or whoever tested him, the first chance he got.
At the sight of Shae's averted, terrified eyes and quiet but clear turmoil, Joon's vengeance was curbed. He wanted answers first.
Jungkook closed the side study door behind them. They four of them could then speak freely.
"What happened?"Joon wanted to know, and he wanted to know now.
Jin started, "Shae's Departed symbol reared its head at Lilith's."
"WHAT."
"I need you to stay calm, Joon."Jin lifted his hands up defensively. "You losing your cool doesn't help anything."
Joon's hands, meanwhile, were tightening into fists. "Tell me exactly. What. Happened."
Shae was so exhausted. She just wanted to be alone with her thoughts and emotions, but that didn't seem to be possible just yet. She settled for taking a seat in the small sofa that was in the room.
Jin explained what he'd seen upon arrival back at Lilith's.
"First of all—you LEFT THEM THERE ALONE. WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!"
"Well there was this restaurant deal...."
"Don't finish that sentence, or so help me...."
Jin gave a nervous laugh.
"And then...wait, who were these guys?" He looked sharply down at where Shae, and the prickle in his voice made her realize that her skin was trembling. She clasped her hands tight around her knees as if that could stop them from knocking together, but it wasn't just in her knees. This terror. It was crawling through her skin.
Jin went on, "Calm down, Joon. You need to stay calm."
"I am calm!" Joon's voice resonated through the room, "Now who were these assholes?!"
Jin glanced over at Jungkook, who nodded where Joon couldn't see.
Then Jin went on. "Yoongi and Hoseok were there, though it appears Hobi was behind the offending assault that triggered the rune."
Joon's right arm swung back, reared and ready to strike Jin where he stood. Jungkook lunged forward before that could happen, locking Joon in a neck hold from behind as he spoke into his leader's ear, "Calm down, hyung. You need to calm down. Breathe."
"GHAAAA!"
"Breathe, hyung. Just breathe."
Shae was struck with the memory of Joon, at the beginning of the gala, whispering those exact same words into her ear whenever she could hardly stand from fear. She looked at him now, the anger and anguish writhing inside of his body, and her heart broke in full. She didn't recognize when she started crying, but her vision was blurred now, all of the tension and emotion of the day finally too much to bear.
Her knees were still shaking. She stood up and crossed the room to the three young men, wiping the tears from her face.
Jungkook still held Joon's strugling, tense frame in a choke hold.
Shae reached out an put a hand on Joon's bare forearm anyway.
At her touch, Joon's furious eyes shifted from his target, Jin, down to Shae.
His ferocity was striking. Shae could hear her heartbeat pounding in her own ears.
"Please don't fight," she said quietly. "I'm sorry if what happened... I'm sorry. I'm just really sorry."
Jungkook's hold on Joon slackened as he felt his leader's fists of rage ease into something else. He let go of Joon and backed away.
The leader of Noon Mool didn't hesitate.
He rushed into her, his strong arms wrapped tightly around Shae and tucking her into his chest. Everything in him said to hold her, to make space for her in this nook in his neck, to shield her from the fears that were assaulting her. To shield her from the threat of death, no matter where it came from.
"You can go now," he said to Jin and Jungkook, his voice crisp and level now over the sound of Shae's quiet tears.
Jin and Jungkook looked at each other. Jin nodded. Then the pair walked their way out of that sitting room.
Jin sent one last knowing look in at Kim Namjoon, at the fear and anger and longing he saw etched into his friend's face as he held Shae's slender frame with such careful determination. Then the good doctor shut the door carefully on the scene and let them be.
Jungkook stood unmoving outside of that closed door. Something itched inside of him that told him Stay.
Jin sent a confused look over his shoulder whenever he started to walk away, but Jungkook didn't start to follow. "Aren't you coming?"
With sad, serious eyes, Jungkook turned towards Jin. "Hyung. I need to tell you something. I need to tell someone."
"Well, what is it then?"
"I...." He looked back towards the closed door and reached out a hand to softly touch the wooded frame. His eyes were wide and wild. "I think I'm going insane."
____
Joon held Shae a long time, until her tears were finished. Then his arms slid from her. He pulled out a cloth handkerchief and Shae used it to wipe her eyes and blow her nose, while Joon pushed the hair back from her face.
This gesture made her laugh, feeling foolish.
"What?"
You, Kim Namjoon. Just you.
She set the tissue aside on the end table next to her, then her palms padded at her face. Her eyes felt red and puffy and ugly. Her knees were still shaking, but she felt better. She felt the calm settling in that comes from a deep, full cry.
Joon reached out and cupped her face in his hands. His thumbs wiped beneath her eyes where tears had just flowed.
"Feel better?" he asked, his voice low and tender, void of the sharpness and anger that it had held before.
Her damp eyes fluttered up at him. "Yes. Thank you."
His hands slipped from her skin, and his gaze fell down to look at his palms a moment. His hands, that had been balled fists so many times that day. His hands that had wanted to strike so many people for their idiocy that day. For their humanity.
Fury and self-loathing brewed inside of Namjoon.
We have no room to be human, he thought. But then... does that make us monsters? I don't want to be a monster. No. Right now, I just want to be a man.
He looked up at Shae again, at her gorgeous blue eyes, and his fingers slipped around her neck while his thumbs braced into the nook of her jawline with delicate finesse.
"Just breathe, Shae," he whispered softly, their faces nudging closer to each other.
He smelled like resin and wine, she thought. His smell and the feeling of his fingers and his strength against her skin was all she knew. Nothing else.
They kissed, pulled and poured, skin to skin.
They kissed, and Shae finally learned why they called it falling.
____
Jungkook didn't know if he could look Jin in the face or not. He tried.
He's not looking at me like I'm a crazy person. And he's a doctor, right, so that's a good sign?
"You're saying that you saw what happened at Lilith's. Us. Yoong and Hobi. Shae's rune reaction. You saw it like a vision."
Jungkook nodded again.
"You're saying you've had this happening since...since this accident in the Crux Galaxy that you so STUPIDLY have avoided tell anyone about in full length up until this point. Am I correct? That's all there is to say?"
"Well... a few nights, I've found myself waking up somewhere random. Like I've been sleep walking. And, you know me, I don't sleep walk. I sleep like a rock!"
"As hard as that head of yours is," Jin grumbled. "Yes, I know."
"But I think...I think I've been sleep walking into the ladies' suite. Into Shae's room."
Jin looked horrified.
"Please don't tell Joon! At this point, he's primed and ready to murder any one of us...and I'd rather it not be me."
"What makes you say that? I mean, I'm used to death threats from Joonie myself, but they ebb and flow like the tides. And like my whims." Jin chuckled.
With great seriousness, Jungkook explained the events of the day at Noon Mool base in full to his unaware friend.
"This explains why Sehun tried to pick a fight," Jin muttered under his breath. Then he said with more direct authority, "Well then. Here's what we're going to do. I'm going to run a few tests and we'll see if we can't work out more of what's going on with you. But we'll keep this just between us for now, sound good?"
Jungkook nodded enthusiastically. "I'd rather keep my life, if possible."
Jin spoke with uncharacteristic seriousness, "I'd rather you did too, my friend."