Subaru's P.O.V.
What do I fear, you ask?
Of course it would be...
...losing you.
The vampire sat beside the human who was happily devouring a cone of ice-cream. He watched her silently, not bothering to utter any word.
"Subaru?"
"Hm?"
"Are you tired?"
"No. Why?"
"Your face kinda looks like it."
Did my face really look like that? Was I tired even though I was by her side?
I was sure I enjoyed myself. After all, I was spending time with her.
I told her I was fine and so she returned back to her ice-cream. I pondered over those words she said to me for the rest of the day.
The rain poured down heavily, lightning struck and thunders roared.
However, those weren't what woke Subaru up.
I could hear the disturbing noises of teeth chattering. I growled and rose up the bed.
Bed?
Just then, I realized I fell asleep while talking with her the previous day.
By my side, I saw her shivering figure curled up into a ball on the left side of the bed beneath the covers. I frowned as I stared at her in such state.
The weather was indeed very cold.
But what could I do to comfort her?
A vampire like me who had nothing but a stone cold body... I couldn't do anything to keep her warm, could I?
So I gently shook her, hoping she'd wake up.
But who am I kidding?
Those light shakes wouldn't wake up a heavy sleeper like her.
I sighed and carressed her cheeks. Despite the coldness we were feeling, her body was still very warm.
I removed the strands of hair from covering her face and smiled. She looked so peaceful in her sleep.
"[Y/N]..." I whispered.
I gave her my share of blanket, wrapping her to make sure the cold wouldn't get to her before lying back down on the bed, staring upon the dark ceiling.
"Subaru...?"
Her sudden voice surprised me.
"W-What? Why are you awake!?"
"Huh...? I don't know, I suddenly woke up? Probably because of the cold, I guess..."
"Oh, I see.." Subaru muttered as he averted his gaze away.
"Hey, what about you? Why aren't you asleep?" You questioned.
"I woke up because of... the thunders earlier."
"Ah, I see..."
The sound of the rain hitting on the roofs and the ground occupied the room, the two of you had closed your eyes once again although none were planning to sleep.
You reached out your hand to his, slowly holding his in your own.
Subaru's eyes slammed open, "WHAT?"
"HAH?" Shocked by the sudden loud voice he made, you shouted as well.
"Tch." He looked away to cover the blush on his face. Even though the room was already dark, meaning you had no way of seeing his face, not to mention his blush.
"Uh, can't I?"
"NO! I mean, yes! Huh...?"
You chuckled upon hearing his respond and held his hand tighter.
To be honest, [Y/N] holding my hand like that made me feel so safe.
Like, she was the place I belong to.
The fluttering feelings in my chest could only be felt when I'm with her.
But why... do I feel so exhausted by her side?
Eventually, we fell asleep holding each other's hands.
He hated the sunshine. He despised the sun itself. He resented the blinding light.
Finally, the day was coming to an end.
He sat by the river's bank, watching the sun to set in impatience.
He released a sigh, whether it was a sigh of relief or exhaustion, none could determine.
Subaru stared into the river and saw the fishes swimming in it, thinking of how much he missed the warm feelings that only appeared when you were in his presence.
It had not been a day but he missed you already, that was weird according to him.
Should he go see you?
Maybe not.
I didn't even know what I should talk to her about.
It would be too awkward.
But... I wondered if she was alright.
What could she be doing in the mansion? I wanted to know.
Rather than sitting and pondering pointlessly, I rose up and headed towards the said mansion.
"Stop, Ayato! Give me back my glasses--"
"What!? I DIDN'T HEAR YOU!"
"Stop pretending, Ayato!"
Subaru growled under his breathe, his fist already clenched tight as if he was ready to score a hole into the wall.
He quickly walked pass his idiotic and noisy brothers, approaching where your scent was currently at.
I saw her, rummaging through the shelves in the refrigerator.
She looked so frustrated, was she hungry?
Nevertheless, I found that expression.... that expression... that... to be... pretty cute.
I blushed at the sight and held my head down to cover my face. Even though I knew she wouldn't even notice me there.
"What're you doing there, Subaru?"
And I was wrong, she noticed much earlier than I had expected.
I had wiped away the scarlet clouding my face and faced her properly. Her eyes looked as if they were sparkling. She looked so... beautiful. Her pink lips was so tempting that I swallowed a gulp.
What did you even do to me?
Since when had I fallen to your charms?
I remembered seeing you as nothing special but a human prey. I remembered not even wanting to look at your pitiful face.
Since when had I considered you beautiful?
I approached her and she stood up, smiling at me.
"I'm hungry but there's nothing but Kanato's sweets. I don't wanna die so I can't eat anything." ;-;
"Then, how about we... like, go outside and..."
"Really? You wanna go outside?"
"Hah? Well, why not!? I'm also hungry."
You smiled and nodded, "Then, I'll get my coat and stuffs. Wait!"
She looked so excited, what was so exciting about that?
Although I also felt my heart beating fast, was I also excited?
We had known each other for years, we had started getting close to each other last year.
And yet, we still felt like it was the very first time.
Was that common for people who were in love?
...in love?
I? IN LOVE?
I felt like digging a hole through the wall with my head as soon as I realized what I was just thinking about.
I was such an idiot.
"Nfu~ is Subaru-kun going out on a date with Bitch-chan?"
"SHUT UP!!"
"Laito, don't tease... *yawn* Subaru.. I don't wanna get yelled by the oldman 'cuz of the destruction again."
"Tch." Subaru rolled his eyes.
"Sorry for the wait!" ><
You came running down the stairs, right straight towards Subaru.
"Tch, calm down."
You chuckled for you had caught a sight of him blushing despite his words.
"Let's go then." His back faced you as soon as he said that and walked out of the foyer.
The barely visible crescent moon greeted you, dimly shining above the two of you as you walked towards whatever good restaurant to eat.
"What should we eat, Subaru?"
"I don't know..."
"I saw a takoyaki stand earlier--"
"ARE YOU SUGGESTING THAT WE EAT TAKOYAKI!?"
"Huh? Why??"
"I SMELL THAT SHIT EVERYDAY CUZ OF THAT IDIOT, I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF IT THOUGH I'VE NEVER EATEN IT!"
You laughed at how annoyed he was by the mere mention of takoyaki. True, Ayato ate it everyday and the smell was broadcasted throughout the mansion. And he knew Subaru despised it so he purposely ate in his room one time. Subaru was so mad that he chased Ayato who of course ran away far, almost to the neighbouring town.
"How about we eat steak?"
"...I have no complain."
The supposed-to-be couple found a quite fancy restaurant and went inside.
I ate my fill.
I was so happy I got to enjoy such time with her.
And the food wasn't so bad either.
We talked a lot but... it had not even been an hour and I was already tired.
"Subaru?"
"H-Hah?"
"Have you been lacking sleep?"
"No, why?"
"You almost fell asleep earlier. Are you alright?"
Did I fell asleep?
Even though I was in the midst of talking with her?
Maybe I had not been resting properly.
I paid no mind and continued our idle talk, occasionally chuckling before we went home.
Subaru sat in his seat as the teacher was explaining something he wasn't interested in.
A sigh escaped him.
He had been resting a lot lately due to the incident on that night.
Soon enough, the bell rang indicating that it was dismissal time.
He couldn't be more grateful than he already was.
"Subaru!"
"H-HAH?"
"You... DID YOU SEE KOU!?"
What was Yuma even doing?
I sighed and shook my head, "No."
"FUCK IT."
He cursed and ran fast, I wonder what was with that.
I shrugged and walked towards the entrance, wanting to go home as soon as possible.
I saw her by the gate. Was she waiting for me?
A smile painted itself on my face as I approached her.
"Finally, Subaru! My legs are tired waiting for you."
"Who told you to wait for me?"
Apparently, Ayato had basketball club activities, Shuu wasn't found anywhere, Laito went somewhere, Kanato said he went to a sweets store and Reiji stayed behind to finish a few things. That left the two of us alone in the limousine.
As we were talking, I could feel myself zoning out a few times.
You were telling Subaru about Kou's and Yuma's quarrel earlier. It was so hilarious watching the two of them having their brotherly fight.
"So that's why Yuma was frantically searching for Kou. Heh, ridiculous."
Despite that, Subaru seemed to be enjoying the little story you were telling him.
"And y'know! Kou was so frustrated to the point he threw his bag stuffed with books at Yuma's face! It's even funnier when you add the fact that he's an idol. It must have been viral on the net by now!"
"..."
"Hm? Subaru?"
You peeked at your left, where Subaru was sitting at. Your eyes went wide the moment you realized he was sound asleep.
"...even though he was enjoying himself just a few seconds ago."
You frowned, releasing a heavy sigh.
'I wonder what's wrong with Subaru...'
*************
"Subaru, Subaru!"
I felt someone shaking me. It was so annoying, I had such a good nap!
I clicked my tongue and snapped my eyes open.
"What!?"
"S-Subaru!?"
I went wide-eyed when I realized I was still in the limousine.
"Did I... fell asleep?"
"Yeah, in the middle of us talking yet again.."
"Ah, I see..."
I frowned. Yet again, indeed.
I had lost count at how many times I fell asleep when we were talking. I enjoyed myself, I had fun, I felt comfortable.
Then why?
"Are you ok, Subaru?"
I made her worry over me too.
"I'm fine, no need to worry."
Maybe I should go ask Reiji? He might know what was up with my body.
We exited the limousine, my body felt so heavy that I went straight into my room and slept.
You rolled on your back, sighs constantly leaving your lips.
"Is Subaru sick or something..?"
"Hmm, vampires never get sick so maybe when they are, these kinda complicated stuffs happen."
"I hope nothing happens..."
*************
"Subaru, there is really nothing wrong with you. Aren't you just not resting enough?"
"How many times should I tell you? I sleep like more than 12 hours a day! I sleep during classes, I sleep as soon as I get home! Are you calling that lack of sleep!?"
"But you aren't sick or anything. Just what is going on..." Reiji sighed, "Please give me time, I might figure this out soon."
"Alright."
*************
"Subaru...? Are you not gonna eat dinner?"
"I'm not feeling hungry."
"Okay then..."
It had been awhile since I consulted with Reiji regarding this matter.
He hadn't given me any answer though.
And to avoid her from worrying too much over me, I kept a distance between us.
I... really missed her.
I missed talking with her, I missed her warmth.
"[Y/N]..."
*************
"How is your condition, Subaru?"
"I've been pretty good lately."
"Is that so?"
"Yeah, I'm not all that tired anymore. I can keep myself awake for a whole day without feeling sleepy."
"Then, I guess my aid is not needed. In the end, I still couldn't find anything wrong with you. Good to hear that you're well now."
"Yeah, and thanks."
I had regained my usual strength after a week of avoiding her.
I felt bad troubling Reiji like that but it relieved me hearing that I wasn't sick or anything.
"[Y/N]?"
I called out to her after I landed three knocks on her door.
She didn't answer so I barged right in.
"Are you sleeping or—"
She wasn't inside.
Where could she be? In the garden, maybe?
I headed towards the said place I had in mind.
From afar, I could smell her scents.
I... I missed these scents so much.
I saw her with red roses in her hand. She was staring at them with a sorrowful look.
"[Y/N]."
You heard his voice calling out to you, "Subaru!?"
It had been a week since you last saw each other.
He walked towards you, his visible red eye seemed to glimmer.
"Subaru, a-are you alright now?"
"Yeah, after all these time resting."
The smile Subaru showed you lightened your whole world up.
"I... I'm so glad." You threw yourself towards him, wrapping your arms around him tight and letting the roses fell to the ground.
He was hesitant at first but he eventually wrapped his own around you, "[Y/N]..."
*************
"How have you been...?"
Subaru had a light blush on his face. Spending time away from you for a week made the situation all awkward for him.
"Eh? Um, I've been... sad. Since I didn't get to see you at all."
"I see... Did something happen?"
"Like...?"
"Well, did any of my stupid brothers disturb you!?"
You chuckled upon that question, "Of course not. They know well that I belong to you."
Subaru's face went red in a mere second, "STUPID, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!"
"That was caused by your weird question! Ah, but something did happen."
"What was it?"
You began telling him about the intense fight between Ayato and Shuu. Well, it wasn't a fist fight or anything. Just a heated argument that was actually pretty amusing. Ayato was being so persistent, insisting that it wasn't his fault so he shouldn't be sent back to the castle to meet his father. Shuu started to get annoyed and began teasing him.
"Omg and you know what he said!? He said— Eh..? Subaru?"
Your eyes were filled with the emotion of shock and sorrow.
Subaru had once again fallen asleep.
"Hey, Subaru..."
"Subaru, please..."
"Subaru, wake... u-up."
You sobbed, tears streaming down your face.
You choke on your breathe as you tried to stop your tears from flowing.
I felt something wet dripping on my hand.
And I heard a very familiar voice sobbing beside me.
I opened my eyes and noticed it was tears dropping down towards my hand.
"[Y-Y/N]...!?"
"Oi, what's wrong!?"
"S-Subaru, you..."
"...did I fell asleep just now?"
*************
It wasn't going anywhere.
I thought I had finally went back to my original condition.
But as soon as I spent time with her, I fell asleep.
Now that I thought about it, I only felt tired when I was by her side.
Like, my energy was drained by her.
We talked this over with Reiji and I fell asleep in the middle of him telling us his thoughts.
Why... did this have to happen...?
*************
"Subaru, maybe we are just not destined to be with each other?"
I fought back the urge to close my heavy eyelids.
"D-Don't say that, idiot!"
"But you see... this happen and..."
"It's okay, Reiji is... trying... try... Dammit!"
"Subaru... it's like we are cursed."
"Cursed...?"
"Yeah. And the curse only reacts when I'm present."
"Don't be stupid, there'd be no way..."
"Right!? I'm so... stupid."
"Stop... don't... Don't cry.."
"Eventually... if this continues... I won't be able to talk with you. You'll... you will only be unconscious the moment we meet."
"There... there must be a way."
"Yes, there... must be a way. There must be... Indeed, it might be nice if there was a way."
Stop, please don't say anything anymore.
I wanted to embrace her and told her it was going to be fine. But... with my body so heavy and my eyes about to close, just what could I do?
She was crying in front of me and yet, I couldn't do anything.
Could the only thing to stop this so-called curse was for us to separate?
No, I...
*************
In the middle of the woods, there stood the white-haired vampire.
Profanities left his dry and cold lips.
The full moon shone above him as he used the tree as his punching bag.
His fists were covered in bruises and blood.
It's been a year since then.
I haven't met her since then.
I feel like dying since then.
I don't know where she is right now.
Is she eating well? Is she even alive?
I want to go search for her.
I want to so much but...
But...
A scream of agony left him as if he was of a wolf howling beneath the full moon.
***********************************
Wow, that's 2929 words excluding the Author's Note here XD
This is the longest P.O.V. chapter ><
It doesn't quite make sense lol
AND HAPPY B'DAY, SUBARU BBY *^*
The quote in the pic above is from the first lines of Ozaki Kouyou of Bungou Stray Dogs XD I haven't searched if it was the real her's quote or only the lines in BSD ><
She was so amazing in the manga, she's my queen XD and Alcott is my princess ^^
Btw, October was such a productive month for me. I updated 6 chapters *^*
Aannd~ I have reached the 60th chapter!
I'll be editing all the past oneshots and scenarios I've published as mentioned in the few previous chapters and the description of this story ^^
I won't be updating much. But don't worry! I'll update like, once or twice more before October ends *^*
And I'd like to focus more on 10 DAYS >< pls read if you haven't EHEEHEHE I'll update later today ^^
Have a good day or night, all of you~!
And feel free to ask any question regarding this book ^^
Oh, I actually googled the moon phase for the 4th of November XD for that line, "the barely visible crescent moon greeted you," AHAHAA
Published On: 04/11/16 | 19:31
Edited On: 20/05/17 | 16:30
~Scar-chan UFU~