A/N- I don't mean literally but like in close proximity. Then again that would be hilarious!
Calum:
It was a long drive back to the house and things hadn't been going well so far. The two of you had spent all day visiting your family at the beach and now it you had to endure the four hour drive back. As much as you both loved your relatives they had gotten on your last nerves leaving two very irritable people.
Currently you were fighting over the radio station. Calum wanted to listen to sports talk and you wanted to listen to music. Every time one of you changed it the other would switch it back creating a never ending loop of random syllables pouring from the speakers. Up to this point neither of you had said anything but it was getting ridiculous and you couldn't stand it anymore.
"Stop it." You snapped smashing the button back.
"No." He frowned again changing the station.
"Seriously. Calum, stop it." You gritted out turning to face him.
"No my car my radio." He countered ignoring you whining.
"You don't need to listen to music and drive." You argued hitting the button even harder than before breaking the stereo.
"LOOK WHAT YOU DID NOW WE CAN'T LISTEN TO ANYTHING!" Calum screamed turning bright red in pure rage.
"IF YOU DIDN'T KEEP CHANGING IT THIS WOULDN'T BE A PROBLEM." You yelled back not backing down.
"Y/N." Calum growled out lowly clearly not appreciating the sass. You didn't respond, just huffed and turned away looking out the window.
The silent treatment worked well for about half an hour. You both calmed down and returned to your mildly irritated states when the silence had to break. You had drank several glasses of water since it was so hot outside and now you had to go. Unable to hold it any longer you turned to your brother.
"Calum we need to stop." You whined.
"What? No. We need to get home." He rolled his eyes completely ignoring the problem at hand.
"I don't think you understand. We NEED to stop." You began to fidget in your seat bouncing your leg up and down to distract yourself.
"Hold it." Calum responded turning to examine your state.
"Fine. Be that way." You decided to take matters into your own hands and unbuckle your seat belt.
"What are you doing?" Calum's eyes widened as you shimmied between the front seats and into the back, going through the beach bags.
"What do you think?" You mocked him ignoring the question. Calum was quiet watching you in the mirror as you finally pulled out something useable, the container you had used to pack sandwiches for lunch.
"NO NO NO! YOU JUST BROKE MY RADIO YOU DON'T NEED TO PEE EVERYWHERE TOO!" Calum's eyes widened in realization and you sent him a mock sympathy glare before lowering yourself down behind his seat for some privacy.
Calum kept on yelling and screaming at you to stop but there was no stopping that train once it had started. You finished and put the lid on the container standing up and climbing back into your seat.
"Please tell me you didn't." Calum begged finally pulling over.
"But I did." You chuckled dropping the now warm container onto his lap.
"EWWWWW!" He shrieked pushing it onto the ground.
"Next time stop."
Michael:
The boys had never been known for their decision making skills and Michael was no exception. He constantly did questionable things pulling others along for the ride. Today was no exception. Your brother had invited all of the boys over to hang out, but that quickly turned to drinking games. Drinking games turned to getting completely wasted and before you knew it the living room was filled with four mumbling wasted boys.
"What did you guys DO?" You shrieked finally coming in to check on them after hearing a loud thump.
"Hunnnnnng outttttt." Ashton slurred, rolling over on the floor. That noise must have been Luke pushing him off of the couch. Wasn't he supposed to be the responsible one?
"I can see that." You sighed taking in the damage, the tables and floors were filled with cups, bottles, and cans. The floor had taken an obvious beating and was rather sticky. Not to mention the still half full containers of various types of alcohol littered across the room.
"Don't be such a killjoy." Calum muttered blindly reaching around him for another drink.
"Oh no you don't. I'm cutting you all off." You announced amused, and a chorus of groans greeted you. Grabbing a trash bag you threw away everything empty and took anything still drinkable to hide in the basement. Walking down you shoved the handful of bottles in the closet and headed back upstairs.
"CHUG CHUG CHUG!" Three voices greeted you and you ran into the room to see Michael finishing off another bottle of the foul smelling liquid.
"NO! HOW DRUNK ARE YOU?" You screeched snatching the bottle and leaning over Michael to asses the damage while the other three giggled and chattered incoherently.
"Michael can you tell me what time it is?" You asked gently, helping him sit up.
"Time is pointless, arbitrary. Age is but a number. Who carrrres?" He hiccuped wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and hazily looking up at you.
"Are you always this deep while your drunk?" You chuckled.
"'M not drunk, my name is Michael." He said very seriously, pointing to himself.
"I'll take that as a no then." You huffed walking over to the other three who were all attempting to get up.
"What do y'all think you're doing?" You quirked an eyebrow and Luke turned around so fast he fell over.
"Going home." Ashton answered, nodding towards the door while Luke laid face down on the floor.
"Nope. No. I think it's best if you all stay here until you sober up." You frowned, grabbing the keys from Ashton's hand.
"But I'm tireeeed." He stomped his foot like a small child and looked at you angrily.
"Go to bed then." You snapped, patience wearing thin. He stuck out his tongue and went to stomp over to the couch but tripped over Luke falling on him in a heap. You were going to help him up, but Luke was already asleep and you figured it would be best to fight one battle at a time, you would make them sleep on something more comfortable later.
"Where's Calum?" You asked suddenly, realizing that you were a man down. Luckily a yell from the top of the stairs caught your attention and you got out of the way just in time as Calum was mattress surfing down.
"WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?" You yelled, as Calum stumbled up still whooping in happiness.
"Uhm..." He frowned looking down at his fingers to count.
"Never mind, just help me drag it into the hallway." Creative problem shoving was the name of the game and you just scored a few more points. You shook your head at his state, but he nodded actually lifting his side until you pushed the bare mattress next to the two blondes. It took a few minutes, but you coaxed all three onto the mattress to sleep. You were about to get Michael when your phone started buzzing.
"What is it now?" You groaned, checking your texts to see lots of random letters and numbers from your brother.
"Michael what are you doing?" You asked, not expecting an answer as you pocketed his phone.
"Texting you." He replied simply, continuing to move his hands even though his phone wasn't there.
"But it was just random characters?" You began to drag him towards the pile of 5sos boys in the hallway.
"You wouldn't understand. The inner mechanisms of my mind are an enigma." He explained making you pause momentarily.
"Did you just quote Patrick? You really are a strange drunk." You shrugged rounding the corner.
"I already told you, my name is Michael." He clicked his tongue and you finally got him to where the other boys were resting.
Turning around to the other three you were completely unprepared for the sight in front of you, "WHY ARE YOU THREE NAKED?"
Ashton:
As much as you loved him, you and Ashton bickered. It was just a little at first, but over time your little arguments had evolved into knockdown drag outs, the whole house filled with thick tension when you were ignoring each other. These petty fights were never over anything at all important, in fact they were often frivolous in nature, him not putting the seat down, or you making too much noise. The issue was that even though your arguments weren't long, they were pretty intense dragging everyone in the middle. The boys had expressed their obvious displeasure, but it had no effect on you or Ashton, so unbeknownst to the two of you, they developed their own plan.
"ASHTON HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU TO SHUT THE DOOR AFTER YOU LEAVE MY ROOM!" You stomped down the stairs and into the kitchen where all four boys were snacking. The other three groaned right away, and turned to face each other as Ashton narrowed his eyes at you.
"Are you trying to hide something? Why do you need your door closed?" He asked, putting down his pizza so that he could cross his arms.
"I like peace and quiet and privacy, which is hard when you four are always screaming and yelling and carrying on." You said sassily, making Luke pop his head up to stick his tongue out at you.
"Ya know that's funny coming from the person who-." Ashton began to speak, but he was cut off by Calum who stepped between you two.
"Ya know, there's really a simple solution here that doesn't require any more yelling." He offered, then moved through the hallway, gesturing for everyone to follow. You and Ashton looked at each other suspicious, but were prodded on by Luke and Michael.
"What are we doing at my room?" You asked when Calum paused in front of your door.
"Take a look." He opened it and stepped back, allowing the two of you to go in first. It was no sooner that Ashton had safely made it inside when the door was slammed shut and something was moved to block it.
"WHAT THE!" You turned around and began to pull on the doorknob, pounding on the wood with your hand, "LET US OUT!"
"THIS ISN'T FUNNY GUYS!" Ashton screamed through the door, joining you.
"YOU TWO CAN COME OUT WHEN YOU SOLVE YOUR PROBLEMS!" Michael's muffled shouting was heard through the door.
"WE'RE FINE!" You screamed angrily.
"IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!" Ashton added.
"IT IS WHEN WE CAN'T BE OVER WITHOUT TAKING SIDES!" You could hear the whine in Luke's tone making you roll your eyes.
"I'M GOING TO KILL ALL OF YOU!" You yelled frustrated.
"THROUGH THE DOOR?" Calum's giggled and you could hear footsteps moving away.
"DON'T GO!" Ashton said frantically, hitting the door some more.
"WE'LL BE BACK IN HALF AN HOUR!" Luke informed you, just before the front door closed.
"DON'T GO ANYWHERE!" Michael chuckled and you heard the door open and close again before running to the window and watching their car drive away.
"This sucks." You groaned face-planting onto your bed.
"Tell me about it." Ashton agreed sitting next to you.
"Well, if you really want me to, I don't like the fact that-" Ashton cut you off quickly.
"That was rhetorical. Why do you have to take everything so literally?" He rolled his eyes and turned away.
"I was just trying to be polite and answer your question, no need to be rude." You frowned, also turning away from his back.
"Hmph," He replied, still pouting.
"Fine." You snapped, not giving in.
"Fine." He repeated, still facing away. You sat for a few minutes, pouting in silence when your stomach began to hurt and you didn't want to stay in the room any longer.
"Ashton?" You asked tentatively, peeking at him over your shoulder.
"What?" He replied significantly less angry.
"Can we go, I'm hungry." You pouted, rubbing your stomach which conveniently began to growl.
"How? They blocked the door," He huffed walking over and peeking underneath the door to see if he could figure out what the barricade was, "With a bookcase."
"Well, what would you do if there was a fire?" You asked, stepping back and reexamining the room.
"Hide under the bed?" He shrugged, checking underneath.
"No. That is not a good idea. How about we look for a way OUT!" Your anger flared, but you reigned it in and turned back to your brother.
"Window?" He suggested, walking over to the fair sized window on the side of your room.
"It's a straight drop down, I don't want to break a leg over this." You said nervously, as Ashton popped the screen out and opened it up to look down.
"Relax, we can take the sheets and tie them into a rope, I'll hold it and you climb down, then come back in and move the bookcase." He chuckled, already pulling the bedding off.
"What if I fall?" You said hesitantly, looking down out the window to the grass below.
"Hmmmmmmm." Ashton grinned, grabbing a pillow and ripping the pillowcase.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" You shrieked as he ripped the fabric into strips approaching you.
"Pillow armor." He giggled. You watched as he attached one to your head, one to your butt and two to your knees.
"I feel like the dough boy." You pouted but Ashton pushed you to the window, giving you a leg up and handing you the makeshift rope.
"Better than breaking your butt bone." He dismissed, tightly holding on and watching as you vertically walked down the siding.
"I do believe it's called a tailbone." You hollered back up, screaming when Ashton let go of the sheet.
"DON'T DO THAT!" You screeched gripping even tighter as your brother laughed.
"YOU'LL BE FINE! KEEP GOING!" He coaxed, and you made it down to the ground, falling on your well cushioned butt.
"I'M GOOD! BE UP IN A MINUTE!" You turned and ran around the house, straight into Michael who had apparently made it back.
"OOF!" You lost your balance and fell onto your back, having trouble getting up due to the pillows strapped to your knees.
"Y/N? What happened?" Luke asked as the other two laughed and took pictures.
"More like what are you wearing?" Calum elbowed Michael and they both started to laugh again as you still couldn't make it onto your feet.
"Would one of you help me up?" You sighed holding up both hands, and Luke grabbed them, setting you on your feet.
"Thank you, and excuse me for a moment." You nodded at the blonde and turned towards your targets. Zeroing in on Calum you let out a war cry and launched yourself at him butt first, letting the pillows take the blow and knock him off his feet. While he lay on the ground stunned you turned towards Michael.
"Run."
Luke:
Sometimes people take it too far. Whether it was rambling on to the ends of jokes ruining them for everyone else, or making the playful fight a little too violent, things never turned out well. The most recent idea brought up was cops and robbers 'on the next level'. You loved the game as much as anyone else, but it was really just team tag, and playing it with 5sos was hard enough. The 'cops' were usually Calum and Ashton and they didn't tag, they tackled. You had received many a bruise, and now you were terrified of their newest idea.
"Y/N COME AND PLAY WITH US!" Calum yelled excitedly from outside, and you begrudgingly got up from the couch to see what they wanted.
"What?" You grumbled squinting at the brightness. Luke looked just as miserable as you, but Ashton and Michael were chatting animatedly.
"So, since you guys kept on escaping, we decided to buy some security guard handcuffs online to use." Calum smirked, swinging a shiny pair of handcuffs around his finger. You looked at him warily, did he not understand how this worked?
"Isn't the whole point of us going to jail trying to escape? If you handcuff us to something then we can never win." You sighed, drawing the attention of Michael, one of your usual teammates.
"Hey! Y/N is right, we can't win anyway, especially if you handcuff us to something, how can we get tagged out?" He frowned, making Calum roll his eyes.
"FINE! Give us a second to figure this out." Calum snapped, grabbing Ashton and whispering in a huddle.
"Are they serious?" You elbowed Luke, both watching them converse.
"I reallllllllllly hope not." Your brother shook his head.
"OK! So, instead of attaching you to the bush, we will handcuff two of you together, and if there's only one caught, then you get handcuffed to one of us." Ashton giggled, as if that was a normal idea.
"OR we could not play at all, or we could play without handcuffs." You offered shrugging, but they completely ignored you.
"YOU HAVE THREE SECONDS!" Calum screamed, and the three of you scattered, running in all directions hoping you wouldn't be targeted.
After running all the way around to the front yard, you stepped behind a tree to catch your breath. You could hear footsteps running your way, and so decided to peek around the trunk to see who was coming. Your eyes widened as you saw Calum dragging a handcuffed Luke along as he and Ashton chased after Michael. As soon as Michael saw you, he ran over, and grabbed your sleeve dragging you with him.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" You squealed trying to catch up as the other two chased you.
"Saving your butt." He gritted out, determined. Despite Michael's best efforts Cashton was gaining, and you were running out of lawn.
"What do we do now?" You asked facing the edge of the yard in horror things only got worse as the two cops approached, blocking you in.
"Sorry Y/N." Michael responded shoving you towards Ashton and making a run for it.
"MICHAEL WE WERE ON THE SAME TEAM!" You screamed as Ashton gripped your wrists between your back and marched you over to Calum and Luke.
"SORRY Y/N, BUT THERE'S NO HONOR AMONGST THIEVES!" He screamed over his shoulder as Calum unlocked your exhausted brother.
"Good luck you two." Ashton snickered as the handcuffs were secured around your left wrist and Luke's right.
"Jerk." You muttered as he ran after Calum, both in search of your traitorous teammate.
"Y/N let's get them." Luke cracked his neck and looked down at you with a new glint in his eye.
"What happened to the I'm-tired-and-don't-want-to-be-here look?" You asked surprised.
"It's called strategy, I was able to slow Calum down while I was attached to him, giving you and Michael more time." He explained very slowly as if his bizarre strategy was actually a good idea.
"Well what can we do while handcuffed, you're like a foot taller than me, and my wrist is already losing circulation." You whined, so Luke squatted next to you and turned around
"Sit on my shoulders, I run by and you throw stuff at them." He grinned evilly. You liked this side of Luke, and even though you might feel bad later about pelting the boys with rocks, now you were in the game, so you hopped on.
"Ya know we can't actually win this game right, there's no way for the robbers to win, it was rigged from the start." You pouted, as Luke handed up rocks with his free hand and you put them in your hoodie pocket.
"Not if we get them to quit." He snickered, finally straightening out. It was a little awkward since one of your hands was attached to Luke's, but he was able to hold your legs to keep you in place as long as you threw with the other hand.
"If you drop me I will kill you." You whispered as he snuck up behind Calum.
"Noted." He sprinted out, and you took handfuls of the rocks throwing them at Calum , Luke started to circle the poor boy and your onslaught continued.
"MERCY MERCY! UNCLE! WHATEVER YOU WANT STOP!" He screamed making Luke freeze and you pause.
"Unlock us." Luke ordered, walking over.
"I can't I gave Ashton the key." Calum shrugged.
"Well then welcome to the team, you are an official robber." You stuck out your hand, and Calum awkwardly shook.
"Shouldn't we tell Ashton?" He asked swiveling around looking for the curly-haired boy.
"ASHTON CALUM IS ON OUR TEAM NOW SO WATCH OUT!" You screamed throwing your head back.
"TRAITOR!" Ashton screamed from somewhere in the backyard, so you all turned around and ran back around. He was easy to locate, so Luke walked over calmly, both boys stared at eachother.
"We are going to give you one chance, surrender and no harm will be inflicted." You said calmly, making Ashton chuckle.
"What are you going to do?" He smirked, underestimating you. You and Luke nodded at one another and you began the rock throwing process again.
"THIS IS AGAINST THE RULES! OW THAT'S MY EYE! YOU JERK! CHEAP SHOT! FINE I SURRENDER!" He shrieked after a few minutes of intense onslaught. It was a good thing too, since you were starting to run low on ammo.
"Good. Now unlock us." Luke set you down, and you both held out your wrists expectantly.
"Fine," Ashton pouted, searching through this pocket for a key, "um, one problem, it's gone."
"WHAT?" Luke gasped, and Calum began to snicker.
"It was right here I swear, the only person- MICHAEL!" He roared angrily, and you all could hear the distant laughter of an artificial red-head with a stolen handcuff key.
A/N- For those who may not know, cops and robbers is a game similar to tag. There are two teams, the cops and the robbers, the cops chase the robbers, if a robber is tagged the is sent to jail and can only get out if tagged out by another robber. The game is won either when the cops trap all the robbers or everyone quits.