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"Jisung I think you should go home now." Felix said once he walked into his room a few seconds later to see Jisung looking at him with concerned eyes.
He managed to stop crying but that didn't mean that it wasn't obvious that something was wrong. He was refusing to look up and he now suddenly wanted Jisung to go home after being so happy about him being there.
"Lix what happened?"
"I just don't want to be around you right now. Chan's right, you're just messing with my brain. I don't want to see you again Jisung. You're gross and it's making me gross too" Felix explained with a straight face though it took everything in him to not start crying again.
"Okay yeah sure. What did Chan say to you?" He asked, not getting up from his spot on the bed because he refused to leave until Felix told him what was going on.
"Can you please just leave? It doesn't even matter, this doesn't have anything to do with Chan. I don't want you here."
"I'm not leaving until you tell me what happened."
"Nothing."
"I know you don't want to disappoint Chan or lose him as a friend but you can let him control everything you do in your life." Jisung explained calmly.
"It's not about Chan."
"Well you were perfectly fine before you went and talked to him. You were so happy up until he walked into the room."
"Just leave. Please leave."
"Come here," Jisung said, opening his arms, signaling for Felix to hug him.
Felix stared at him blankly for a few seconds but ended up giving in, almost immediately regretting it because he knew he had to cut off all ties with Jisung to make sure he would never have to see him hurt again.
But of course he also couldn't tell the older that.
However, he also wasn't in a very clear mental state at the moment and his thoughts were pouring out without even meaning to.
"I love you so much."
"But not enough." Jisung mumbled, placing a kiss on top of Felix's head as he felt his shirt become damp from the boys tears.
"What's do you mean?"
"You care more about Chan right now which is understandable, you've known him for a really long time. If I had the option I would have stayed in the closet for the rest of my life if that meant my mom would have stayed."
Felix wanted to correct him, part of him wondered if it were actually that simple that he would chose Chan over Jisung. Right now he just wanted to make sure there would be no more bruises any place on Jisung.
"I'm sorry," Felix said instead and clung on even tighter to Jisung. He was going to miss this so much.
"It's okay Lix, I knew everything about this seemed too good to be true. I'll tell your mom that I don't feel well when I leave."
"I'm sorry."
"It's okay, I love you." Jisung said and tilted Felix's face up so that he could place a gentle kiss on his lips. "Let me know if anything ever changes."
Before Felix could even say another word Jisung stood up and walked out of the room, he quickly told Felix's mother that he did not feel well, then he felt tears stream down his face the second he walked out the front door.
Part of him wished he would have begged Felix not to do this but at the same time, he hated arguing and he would do anything to have his mom back and his dad is happy again.
He couldn't help but wonder what kind of awful things Chan could have said to make him change his mood so quickly. He felt horrible that someone had that much control over Felix at all.
What if I ask Chan...?
But I could end up only making things worse.
He wished that he could have told Felix that he shouldn't let Chan make so many choices and decisions for him but he couldn't. Jisung himself was scared of Chan and he didn't want to give advice that would end in Felix getting hurt.
Would Chan hurt him?
Did Chan threaten to hurt him?
He shook the idea from his brain, even though Chan was a horrible person he couldn't imagine him ever doing something directly harmful to Felix.
Or maybe it was just him trying to convince himself that.
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i'm sorry this chapter is kinda short :((