Now playing All I Ask by Adele
Continuation from the 'Tell Me Pretty Lies' CHANLIX chapter
Requested by @BehindTheShadow10
He fixed his tie as he stared at himself in the mirror. He was in a black tux that had a few designs on it, one that he got from a fashion show a few weeks ago. He styled his hair which was now dyed bright red.
Today was the day.
He didn't see it coming, hell he didn't think that it would happen, but life has its way of making the impossible possible; marriage.
Felix heard a notification coming from his phone so he made his way over to the coffee table, grabbing the device and sitting down on the chair behind him. Swinging a leg over the other, he checked that there were a few messages from his manager about an upcoming fashion show and a few brand deals asking for him to model with their products.
It was normal for him to get these; ever since he started focusing more on his modeling, a lot of opportunities came up for him. He was booked and busy that he couldn't take some time for his other job that was being a choreographer in his own dance company. Thankfully, Minho said that he could take over the company but if Felix ever wanted to come back, he would always leave the position for the younger. But the freckled boy thought that it was best to leave the company to the older; he knew that he would take great care of it.
Besides, Minho had been dancing with him whenever the younger had free time.
He saw that his upcoming events will be held in Paris for a few weeks and the manager said that he could bring someone if he wanted. With that, he thought of Minho. The older has always wanted to go over to Paris to try out the food and learn a few things about the cuisine; he was a chef in disguise after all.
Yeah, he should bring Minho would him. He would like the company.
Felix was grateful for Minho, he really was. He had been there even when the freckled boy had nothing and he stuck by him ever since. Even when he had problems with Chan, Minho was always there to lend an ear.
Ah. Chan.
Felix tossed his phone aside as he grabbed the glass of wine that was in front of him. He leaned back in the chair as he brought the drink closer to his lips while his mind was replaying all the moments that he had with Chan up to now.
It was...something.
After finding out about his secret affair with Jeongin, he didn't do anything. He let it continue, just like he said he would to himself. He didn't want Chan to leave at that time and he definitely was afraid of what would become of them if he confronted the older about it.
It hurt. A lot.
He could see the chemistry between them dying, though it had already been dead years back. He didn't know why but he still believed that their love would be alive once again but with how they went, it was almost like a myth. The feelings he felt for Chan were still real and his own stubbornness was the reason why he had been so blind.
And for Jeongin, he didn't even have the urge to hate him. He should, though. The younger was with a man that was in a relationship, he had his mindset on seeing Chan behind Felix's back. He knew that he should despise him for stealing the older away but he felt anything other than that.
He thought that Jeongin was better. He thought that he was enough. The younger managed to catch Chan's interest, he managed to make the freckled boy look boring to the older. Jeongin was better than Felix.
And he couldn't really handle that.
And he once again broke down in front of Minho.
He didn't even realize that he was crying; he remembered telling Chan that he won't be coming that night since he was going to have a night at Minho's and once, he saw the older dancer's face, he couldn't help but melt in his arms. The older brought him into his apartment, immediately crashing onto the nearest couch and wrapping his hands around the freckled boy. Felix remembered telling him in detail, now mentioning the parts where Chan and Jeongin were seeing each other behind his back.
To say Minho was mad would be an understatement, he was about to punch a bitch. He was even angrier than before.
"He even left to see Jeongin on your sixth anniversary? Felix, why are you still with him? He has been cheating on you for three fucking years."
"I-I don't know! I'm just afraid that he's going to leave and-and I can't live with that!"
"He's already gone! He's seeing someone- Jeongin for fuck's sake! I mean- how can you even face both of them even after knowing all of this?!"
"I don't know, I don't know, I don't know! I'm sorry- I just...it hurts..."
"Lix...don't apologize, I'm sorry for raising my voice like that- I'm...you can't do this to yourself."
"I know...but what will I be?"
"What do you mean?"
"What will I be...when he leaves me? I know he will- I know once I confront him, he will leave me."
"Lix..."
"What if I became the person that I promised myself I wouldn't be?"
"..."
"Minho, I love Chan - so much that I'm afraid of what I will be when he leaves."
And that was true. He wasn't sure how he would deal with the older being gone but he knew it was going to be a big one. Chan was the first person that Felix ever truly loved and the freckled boy really believed that he would spend the rest of his life with him. The older picked him up when he was in pieces, showed him the things that seem so insignificant but really have a bigger impact. He showed him what love was really about.
But of course, Felix had to learn the bad side of love all by himself.
"Hyung, will I still have people with me? Will I still have Seungmin- or Hyunjin with me when the news breaks out to our friend group? Will you still be with me?"
He didn't know whether Chan would twist the story when they break up, he didn't know if the older would tell one part of the story to others and leave them to think that's really what happened. Chan wasn't someone like that, Felix knew that about him...but after everything, can he really believe that Chan was still that person who the freckled boy remembers as?
Even if that horrible possibility were to happen, he knew that in friend groups, people are always going to choose sides; and he was afraid that no one would be on his.
But Minho, God, Minho was so quick to reassure him.
"Felix, what are you saying? I would never, in a million years, leave you- especially not like this. I don't care how you will be, I don't care about the person you may become, I will still be with you, whether you like it or not. But- please! Please- stop doing this. How long are you going to sit there and watch him see someone else behind your back, huh?! How long are you going to endure everything?! While you're wasting your tears on him, he is having the best time of his life and that's not fair! I know it's not my place to say anything or even do shit but this can't go long. Can't you see? You're harming yourself by staying with him and I know that's not love! The more you stay, the more your heart cracks. I know you're afraid of being alone, I know you're afraid of how you will cope but Felix- I will be there every step of the way until you're better again. And I'm not just saying it because of the moment, I will be by your side, I promise of that."
"...Why...?"
"Seeing you like this, seeing you in pain every time you hear his name- I can't stand it. I won't. So, it's better if you confront him about this soon or I will- and I promise you, love, it's not going to be pretty if I handle things."
Hearing Minho say that, hearing the words that came out of his mouth; made Felix feel...different. The older had made him feel what Chan hasn't in the last three years they've been together and that made him confused. Why was he feeling like this? Why now?
Either way, he pushed that aside. Minho was right; it can't go on any longer and Felix needed to confront Chan whether he liked it or not. He knew how it would go down and he knew that he had to be prepared for it.
When he was finally getting the courage to talk to Chan, when he was already preparing what he was going to say, something changed. Chan's behavior was hot and he wasn't sure what to feel about it. He saw that the older had stopped going out at night, he stopped seeing Jeongin behind his back and he was spending more time with Felix.
It was as if they were back to normal; they went out dates, Chan used his new pick-up lines, they stayed in at home most of the time. The older was exactly how he was three years ago.
This confused Felix greatly. He wasn't sure whether he should confront Chan about the affair, even though the answer was obvious that he should.
But then, there was one night where both of them decided to have a little fun by drinking together; it was the night where Chan was the one to bring up the affair instead of Felix.
And the conversation hurt.
"I know...you know about me and...Jeongin."
"...I didn't think that this would be the night we would actually talk about it."
"How long were you planning on keeping quiet...?"
"How long were you planning on keeping it a secret?"
"I...I don't know."
"Are you guys still together...?"
"I...don't know."
"I noticed that you stopped seeing him; why?"
"It didn't feel right..."
"Oh? After three years- scratch that, four years, and now you feel like it's wrong?"
"Felix-"
"What happened to us?"
"..."
"What changed? Was I working too much? Was I not giving you much attention?"
"No...it isn't that."
"Was I not pretty enough for you? Was I not good for you?"
"No, no, it's none of that!"
"Then what was it, Chris?! What does Jeongin have that I don't?!"
"I-I don't know! It was dumb of me and even stupid of me to go see him behind your back."
"..."
"I'm sorry, I don't know what happened to us but I can assure you that none of it was you; it was me, I'm the one that fucked up."
"...Do you know...how alone I felt?"
"Lix..."
"Do you know how many nights I spent alone? How many nights I cry because you weren't there?"
"..."
"These past four years...I have never felt more alone than ever. I don't know why I even stayed...but maybe I kept on thinking that you would come back...I prayed that you would come back..."
"I'm here..."
"But you're not at the same time..."
"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry."
"...what happens now? Everything is out..."
"We...need to fix it. We need to talk it out..."
"Then what happens after?"
"We'll worry about that later...let's fix...us."
They spent that whole night talking. Some tears were shed, some truths were shared, some shouts were yelled at, everything came out. That night was the most painful night Felix has ever had but he was glad. They understood better about each other that night and they already knew what would happen after.
"You look stunning, as usual," he heard someone say and he turned his head to see Chan standing by the doorway.
"How did you get in here?" Felix smiled as he stood up, putting down his glass on the coffee table and making his way over to the older.
"Minho lent me the key card, of course."
"Funny he still gave it to you."
"I told him that I needed to talk to you...before the event."
"You're not supposed to out in public, you know."
"I know, but...," he trailed off, his eyes darting away from the younger.
Some things still haven't changed.
Felix chuckled and took his tie in his hands, "You still don't know how to put a tie on correctly, shame on you."
"I can put on a tie myself, I have done it multiple times," Chan protested.
"And it always ended with your fingers tangled in it," the freckled boy stated as he let his hands work their way with the tie. "I have to do it for you myself."
"Hey, you never know I may have done it on purpose," the older looked at him, his eyes staying on the male in front of him.
Felix shook his head and giggled, "You're a dumb one."
Felix still needed Chan.
"You're nervous, aren't you?" the freckled boy stated as he connected his gaze before pulling up the knot so the tie could stay. "It's normal during weddings."
"It's different if it's your own," Chan sighed. "What if something happened? You know, runaway grooms are a thing."
The red-haired male laughed and lightly slapped the older's cheek, "Relax, would you? Jeongin won't run away. He wants it just as much as you do."
"I'm just...afraid whether this is too quick..."
"It's not," Felix reassured, giving the older a small smile; one that is a bit sad but he tried not to show it. "Whatever you're feeling, this is all normal. But you love Jeongin and Jeongin loves you, isn't that more important?"
"Doesn't matter if it's too quick or anything like that," he added after, gently caressing Chan's cheek with his thumb, "the only thing that matters is your love for each other. Today is the day that we all celebrate that."
He watched how the older melted under his touch and look at him with the softest gaze. "Thank you, Felix," he said softly, enough for the both of them to hear. "You always know what to say."
And Chan still needed Felix.
"I'm always here for you," the younger pinched his cheek, chuckling after he heard a whine from the other male. "Don't forget that, alright."
"And I'm here for you too," Chan reminded him, pulling him into a hug. "Don't forget that too."
Felix hugged the older back, enjoying the warmth that gave him before breaking away from the other male. "You should go, your wedding will start soon and we don't want a late groom," he said, pushing the older towards the door.
Chan smiled and turned around to face the other male when they reached the door, "I'll see you there, right?"
Felix nodded, "Of course, you will, I didn't get ready for nothing."
The older chuckled and was about to leave but he peeked over his shoulder, "I love you, Felix."
The freckled boy smiled and nodded his head, "I love you too, Chris."
But it wasn't the love that they used to have.
He watched the older leave the room and he finally let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. He turned around and made his way over to the coffee table to grab his red wine before walking to the balcony. The sky was painted orange with a splash of yellow tint as the sun was slowly going down. His room had one of the best views and he was glad that Minho was able to get it.
He thought about the wedding that was going to happen in an hour or so, he thought about it for quite some time. Marriage wasn't something he always talked about but it was nice to think about. He always thought that he would get married to Chan but life has its way to make some adjustments.
But he wasn't disappointed.
They already made up and he learned after that they were better suited as friends.
The pain and suffering he felt those years were still there for him. There were nights when he couldn't sleep because he always thought that maybe there was something he could change about himself. There were times when he looked at Chan and Jeongin and wonder what he could have changed that would make the older stay.
But he knew that it wasn't right.
Even if he changed, Chan would still leave either way.
"What did that bastard want from you?" another voice spoke behind him and he felt arms wrap around his waist.
Though there were still some scars that needed to be healed, he knew that he wasn't alone.
"That's a bit mean, don't you think?" Felix took a sip of his wine before giving the glass to Minho. "He was just nervous and I calmed him down."
"He has Changbin for that, doesn't he?" the older grumbled as he took a sip from the glass as well before setting it aside from somewhere.
"Sometimes, you need to hear words from one particular person."
Minho hummed, "Whatever it was, I didn't like it."
"You still gave him the key," the freckled boy turned around to face the older, immediately meeting his eyes. "You basically gave him access."
"I wasn't in the right mind," the older protested.
"Alright, alright," Felix cupped both his cheeks, "enough about him. I have something to tell you."
Minho raised his eyebrow, "What is it?"
"I have work that I need to tend to in Paris for a few weeks," Felix stated, "and my manager said I could bring along one person so..."
"You want me to come with you?" he finished his sentence, excitement evident in his tone.
"Yes! I know you always wanted to go to Paris, so I thought that this would be a great vacation away from work for you," the freckled boy explained.
"What about the dance company?"
"You can have Hyunjin be in charge of it for a bit- until you're back, of course."
"I guess I can do that- wait, no, I can do that- oh my god, we're going to Paris!" Minho wrapped his hands around the younger, twirling him around the balcony as both males were laughing. "We're going to Paris!"
"Alright, alright! Calm down!" Felix chuckled as he finally felt the ground on his feet. He gazed softly into Minho's eyes, the older doing the same.
They stayed like that for a moment, not saying anything but talking to each other with their eyes. Felix swears that he could feel his heart pounding against his chest and he was pretty sure that the other male could hear it too. His hands crawled up to cup the side of Minho's face while the older's hands met his waist. They weren't sure what was happening but they didn't want it to end.
They were leaning in, their lips inches away.
But then they heard the doorbell ring.
"Are you guys ready in there?" Jisung's voice was heard behind the door.
"The wedding is about to start and we should be there by now," Hyunjin was there as well.
Both of them pulled away and dusted off whatever was on their outfits. "We...should get going, yeah?" Minho was the first to speak, glancing at the younger. "Don't want to be late, right?"
"Yeah," Felix chuckled and met his eyes once more. "Let's get going."
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woah three updates in a week skjdvnfsjknvkjsfnv
anyway, i always thought about the first one-shot i did and how I left it as it is. I really thought that i would leave it as that but then someone requested that it should have a part two and i thought why not skjdvnkjsnfvkjfn
The chapter of Chan and Felix is now closed BUT there will be another one shot that will continue with Minho and Felix so get ready for that!
I hoped that you guys really liked this one shot, i tried my best to put in the right amount of angst and also a bit of fluff in at the end?
I know it may seem rushed but that was because i am literally in the middle of my trial exams and i have a business exam tmr so i gotta get to that sjkdgnkjsnvjksfnvjk
wish me luck :')
anyways, thank you for reading and i hope you have a wonderful day!