What I Am (Loki Show) [Marvel...

By catalan_andrea

3.3K 90 10

A spinoff of the When Worlds Collide Series. After Loki escapes from New York in 2012 with the Tesseract, he... More

Prologue
Chapter 1: The TVA
Chapter 2: Memories
Chapter 3: That's Enough
Chapter 4: The Escape Attempt
Chapter 5: Working With The TVA
Chapter 6: He's Lying
Chapter 7: The Theory
Chapter 9: Mission To Roxxcart
Chapter 10: Meeting The Variants
Chapter 11: To Shuroo
Chapter 12: Quarrels On The Train
Chapter 13: Cover Blown
Chapter 14: So This Is It
Chapter 15: Back To The Start
Chapter 16: You Never Cared?
Chapter 17: Facing The Time-Keepers
Chapter 18: The Void
Chapter 19: The Loki Variants
Chapter 20: The Plan
Chapter 21: Words Of Advice
Chapter 22: The Calm Before The Storm
Chapter 23: The Departure
Chapter 24: Facing Alioth
Chapter 25: The Offer
Chapter 26: The Duel At The End Of Time
Chapter 27: Torn Apart
Chapter 28: Sarka
Chapter 29: The Tamer Of Beasts
Chapter 30: The Clone Deserter
Chapter 31: The Surprise Attack
Chapter 32: The Rebels
Chapter 33: The Heist
Chapter 34: The Iska Pirates
Chapter 35: Going Undercover
Chapter 36: Leave Me
Chapter 37: Talla
Chapter 38: The Village
Chapter 39: The Watcher
Chapter 40: The Guardians Of The Multiverse
Chapter 41: Defeating Ultron
Chapter 42: The Many Rebel Cells
Chapter 43: A Jedi's Fury

Chapter 8: Nothing Matters

73 3 0
By catalan_andrea

Loki and I both nodded. So with that, we then followed Mobius to Pompeii, Italy in the year 79 A.D. on the planet called Earth. Mobius, Loki, and I hid in an arch, watching the people in the marketplace go about their business. People wore simple tunics and sandals as they wandered about or talked to one another. Some wore gold leaf crowns. There were several simple buildings, decorated with some red paint that was fading away. In the marketplace, there was was a cart filled with goats. By the cart, there were baskets filled with fruits, vegetables, bread, and other food. Not far from us stood a huge volcano, which was about to erupt, killing everyone here.

Loki whispered. "Here we go."

"Shh, any minute now." Mobius advised.

"Until this entire town is wiped off the planet. Imagine. All that volcanic ash..." Loki commented.

"Why are you so excited about this?" I questioned.

"This is our theory, our idea. Of course I'm excited." Loki argued. 

"Yes, but these people are about to die." I protested.

"Storm's right. We don't want to get too giddy." Mobius advised.

Loki groaned. "Oh, come on. It's cool!"

"No, it is cool, but it's just not good taste, because...well like Storm said--" Mobius insisted.

"They're all gonna die anyway." Loki blurted out.

I stared at Loki in disbelief. "Can you have just a bit of sympathy for them?"

"Nope." Loki replied without hesitation, causing me to sigh.

"I know. Now listen, I'm gonna watch the TemPad for any variance energy." Mobius informed us.

Loki nodded. "Okay."

"Okay, because we gotta be careful. If you're wrong, and there's a good chance you are, anything we do can create a huge branch." Mobius reminded us.

"Oh Mobius! You make even the end of the world sound boring." Loki mentioned.

"Listen, we're not meant to be here." Mobius scolded. "Okay?"

"Okay." Loki and I said at the same time.

"Anything we do can impact the course of history. Do you get that?" Mobius questioned.

"Yes." Loki confirmed.

"So we're gonna start with very small disturbances." Mobius informed us.

"Very small." Loki repeated.

"Can you make bird noises?" Mobius asked.

Loki raised an eyebrow. "Bird noises?"

"Yeah, bird noises. Like some whooshing noises." Mobius explained.

Loki and I both stared at Mobius. Loki let out a scoff before gently grabbing my hand, pulling me out into the marketplace. I heard Mobius shouting out. "Loki! Storm! Loki!"

But Loki didn't stop as we reached the cart filled with goats. He lifted me up onto the side of the cart before climbing up next to me. I glanced over at Mobius to see a worried look on his face. I looked back at Loki, rather concerned. If we were wrong, then there would be terrible consequences.

"Loki, this isn't exactly a small disturbance." I mentioned.

"Don't worry. None of this will matter." Loki assured me.

Without a warning, he opened the cart, allowing the goats to wander out into the marketplace. I watched as the goat herder, scrambled out, trying to grab the goats.

"Go!" Loki cried out before yipping. "Be free my horned-friends, be free!"

Loki then began to speak in a different language, one that I hadn't heard of. But the people understood as they gathered around us. I glanced over at Mobius, who threw his hands up in the air. I furrowed my brows. "Mobius, what's he saying?"

"He just told them that the volcano is about to explode and that we're from the TVA." Mobius translated. "And that they're going to die, since the volcano's about to erupt."

I grimaced. "Well, so much for being subtle."

Loki looked over at Mobius. "We are from the future, right? What is the TVA? I mean, it's from the future. It sounds from the future. It's pretty futurey."

Once Loki finished his little speech, he looked around with a proud look on his face. All of the sudden, the volcano erupted, causing people to scream as they scurried about, running out of the marketplace. Loki and I both jumped off the cart, landing on the ground.

"Right on cue! Enjoy your last meal while you can!" Loki exclaimed.

Loki then threw a loaf of bread at the wall before tossing around a couple of vegetables in the air. A huge swarm of volcanic ash headed towards us. My stomach churned. I hope this theory works.

"Nothing matters! Nothing has any consequence! Dance while you can!" Loki shouted. "Whoo-hooo!"

Loki rushed over towards me, lifting me up in the air before spinning me around with his hands around my waist. My eyes widened, completely surprised. I let out a squeal as I held onto Loki for dear life, not expecting him to do that.

"Loki!" I exclaimed.

As I looked down at Loki, I saw a genuine smile on his face. I couldn't help but return his smile as I let out a laugh, feeling happy and carefree, which was something that I hadn't felt in a long while. And this felt nice. It was at that moment that I realized that there's still good in Loki. Mobius then cleared his throat, reminding us that he was still there. I could feel my face heating up at once. I had forgotten Mobius was with us. Loki immediately gently lowered me to the ground. We then both turned around to look at Mobius, waiting for the results. Loki lifted his hands in the air. "How'd we do?"

"I don't believe it. Zero variance energy." Mobius informed us. "No branching in the timeline."

"The TVA would never even know we were here. If it were me, this is where I would hide." Loki mentioned.

Loki and I looked at each other with huge grins on our faces. I gave him a high five as I exclaimed. "We did it!"

Our theory was right. And it felt great. Things were getting better...Or so I had thought.

•••

Once we returned to the TVA, we went to the library. Our table was bombarded with files filled with papers of apocalypses of not just on Earth, but throughout the universe throughout all of time. Loki and I sat next to each other, while Mobius sat across from us. As we searched through the files, Loki ended up falling asleep, his head leaning against a pile of files. I couldn't help but stare at him. Loki looked so peaceful as he slept. The more my gaze lingered, the more I noticed locks of raven black hair falling onto the sides of his handsome face.

"You know staring at him isn't gonna help us out." Mobius teased.

I could feel my face heating up. I didn't mean to stare or get caught staring. I wore a sheepish smile as I glanced over at Mobius. "I'm sorry..."

"Don't be. You can't help it. It's bound to happen." Mobius pointed out.

I then realized that he was referring to Loki and me. I let out a chuckle. "Oh no, no, no. Loki and I aren't gonna to end up together."

"You've seen the files, right?" Mobius inquired.

"Uh, yeah." I replied.

"Then it's no spoiler alert that you two end up together." He mentioned. "You even get married, you have children together."

I scoffed. "Just because some strange old lizard geezers in robes say that's gonna happen, doesn't mean that it's meant to happen."

"Yes it is." He argued.

"No it's not. The future is always in motion." I protested. "One can't dictate the lives' of others, it's simply not done."

"Look if this is about Koltav or Echo--" Mobius began.

Upon hearing those names, I clenched my fists, feeling my anger rise within me. "Do not mention them ever again."

Mobius immediately raised his hands. "Okay, okay, I'm sorry. Look all I was gonna say was that their deaths were not your fault."

"They're deaths are my fault. If everything I've gone through in the past is on that infernal file, then you would know that they would both be alive had they not known me." I protested.

Tears filled my eyes. I then glanced over at Loki, thinking about the way he died. Despite being a pain in the exhaust port amongst other things and seeing the horrors of the holograms of his past, I couldn't help but see glimmers of kindness and goodness. There's good in him and his death was not predetermined. I could stop him from dying. And it was best if I kept my distance from Loki. It was for his best...

"You two need each other. That's all I'm gonna say." Mobius informed me. He then lightly hit Loki with a file that he held in his hand. "Hey..."

Loki woke up at once. I quickly pushed back my tears and my thoughts as Loki's eyes fluttered open, revealing his blue eyes. And I couldn't help but tease him as I remembered what he said to me when I woke up. "Look, sleeping beauty's finally awake."

Both Mobius and Loki looked over at me, completely taken back. I wore a sheepish smile before rambling on in an attempt to explain myself. "Loki called me sleeping beauty earlier when I fell asleep, so I thought I'd get back at him and call him that, but now that I say it out loud it sounds silly..."

Loki's face softened as he gave me a smile. "On the contrary, I think it's clever...and might I say, adorable."

My smile widened. I could feel my heart flutter at his words. As I felt my face heat up, I looked away, not wanting him to see me blushing. Fortunately, Mobius was there, changing the subject.

"Come on, let's take a walk." Mobius advised.

We made our way out of the library and into the cafeteria, which was nearly empty with the exception of a few people. Mobius, Loki, and I sat around at an empty table.

"By the way, at your desk, that magazine?" Loki asked.

"Yeah. The one on jet skis?" Mobius inquired.

So that was the name of the watercraft vehicle. Loki nodded. "Yes. Why do you have that?"

Mobius shrugged. "Because they're awesome."

Loki chuckled. "I suppose they are."

"Yeah." Mobius confirmed. "You know some things...Actually, most things in history are kinda dumb, and everything gets ruined eventually. But in the early 1990s, for a brief, shining moment, there was a beautiful union of form and function, which we call the jet ski, and a reasonable man cannot differ."

"You ever been on one?" I questioned.

Mobius shook his head. "No...no. I think a TVA agent showing up on a jet ski on the Sacred Timeline, that would create a branch for sure."

"It'd be fun, though." Loki commented.

"Yeah, it'd be really fun." Mobius agreed.

"So why read about them?" Loki asked.

"Just helps remind me of what we're fighting for." Mobius replied.

Loki scoffed. "I mean, you really believe in all this stuff, don't you?"

"I don't get hung upon, 'believe, not believe.' I just accept what is." Mobius explained.

I furrowed my brows. That doesn't make any sense to me. Loki rolled his eyes. "Three magic lizards--"

"Time-Keepers." Mobius corrected, cutting him off.

"...Created by the TVA, and everyone in it." Loki continued.

Mobius nodded. "Right."

"Including you?" I inquired.

"Including me." Mobius confirmed.

"You see every time I start to admire your intelligence, you say something like that." Loki mentioned.

"Okay, you created you, Loki?" Mobius asked.

"A Frost Giant of Jotunheim." Loki answered.

Mobius raised an eyebrow. "And who raised you?"

"Odin of Asgard." Loki informed us.

"Odin, God of the Heavens. King of Asgard, a mythical realm, beyond the stars." Mobius replied.

"Wait, King?" I repeated, baffled. "So you're a prince?"

Loki merely shrugged as though it was no big deal. I was taken back. I didn't expect Loki to be a prince. I would've never guessed...But then again, I should have seen it coming. It was Loki's last words in his file before his death.

"I, Loki...Prince of Asgard...Odinson...The rightful King of Jotunheim...God of Mischief..."

"And don't forget Frost giants. Listen to yourself." Mobius intervened, returning to the matter at hand.

"It's not the same. It's completely different." Loki argued.

"No, it's exactly the same thing." Mobius protested.

"No, it's not." Loki insisted.

"I agree with Loki." I chimed in.

"All right, and you created you, Storm?" Mobius asked.

"My parents, Veda and Tâtsâ Ca'ana and in a way through the Force." I explained.

"Do you hear yourself? Through the Force? And your parents, who are human, Echani, Dathomirian, and of the old race of Sith purebloods, who were thought to be extinct?" Mobius inquired.

"It is not the same thing, Mobius." I protested.

"No, it's the same. Because if you think too hard about where any of us come from, who we truly are, it sounds kinda ridiculous. Existence is chaos. Nothing makes any sense, so we try to make sense of it. And I'm just lucky that the chaos I emerged into gave me all this...My own glorious purpose. 'Cause the TVA is my life. And it's real because I believe it's real." Mobius insisted.

"Fair enough. You believe it's real." Loki mentioned.

Mobius nodded. "Yeah."

"So everything is written. Past, present, future. There's no such thing as free will." Loki argued.

"Well, I mean, you know, it's an over simplification--" Mobius began.

But Loki then cut him off. "So, in fact, in a way, you, Storm, and I here at the TVA, we're the only ones who are actually free."

"Where are you going with this, Loki?" Mobius inquired.

"How does it all end?" Loki asked.

"That's a work in progress." Mobius mentioned.

"Oh, those lazy Time-Keepers." Loki retorted. "What are they waiting for?"

"Au contraire. No, because while we protect what came before, they're toiling away in their chamber, untangling the epilogue from its infinite branches." Mobius explained.

"Ah, I see. So, when they're finished, what happens then?" Loki asked.

"So are we. No more nexus events. Just order." Mobius clarified. "And we meet in peace at the end of time. Nice, right?"

Sounds peaceful. If I had to die, then I'd wish for it to be in peace. Part of me thought I would end up dying in the Clone Wars either in a battle or a mission. Loki looked at Mobius, completely bewildered. "Only order."

Mobius nodded. Loki groaned. "No chaos? It sounds boring."

I scoffed. "Of course you'd say that."

"Oh yeah, I'm sure it does to you." Mobius chimed in, agreeing with me.

"You called me a scared little boy." Loki responded, changing the subject at once.

Mobius let out a sigh. "I called you a lotta things along with Storm."

"You did." Loki agreed. "You're wrong, though. You see, I know something children don't."

"What's that?" Mobius questioned.

"That no one bad is ever truly bad. And no one good is ever truly good." Loki claimed.

I scoffed. "That's preposterous..."

But I hesitated as I thought of Dooku, my grandfather. There were times when he could've killed me, yet he didn't. And before he died, he apologized to me with a genuine look on his face. He was good...there was still good in him, even before his death. Mobius looked deep in thought as he whispered. "Scared little boy."

"Yes, it was quite patronizing. I thought it was a bit too far, actually." Loki commented.

I snorted. "Oh you're being a drama queen."

Before Loki could say anything, Mobius shot up from his chair as he blurted out. "You're very clever."

"I know." Loki answered, looking confused.

We then quickly followed Mobius out of the cafeteria. What had Mobius thought of? As we made our way back into the library, I spoke up. "Mobius, care to enlighten us what's going on in that mind of yours?"

"The Variant left something behind at an old crime scene." Mobius explained. "A cathedral. A candy box. An obvious anachronism. I gave it to anaylsis, but they couldn't find anything real."

He then opened up a case from one of the bookshelves, taking out a package of candy that read: Kablooie.

"Why does that matter?" Loki asked.

"'Cause now we have two variables. Apocalyptic natural disasters and...Kablooie." Mobius clarified.

Loki furrowed his brows. "What's that?"

"Candy. Do you have candy on Asgard?" Mobius inquired.

Loki nodded. "Yeah. Grapes, nuts."

"No wonder you're so bitter." Mobius retorted. He then glanced over at me. "Please tell me you've had candy."

"Of course. Styro-taffy and figda are my favorite type of candy." I mentioned.

I remember how Tarom, Gida, Vinor, Myda, Nova, Maya, and I would go to the lower market districts on Coruscant. We would sneak out from the Jedi Temple after supper or training just to grab styro-taffy and figda. Mobius and Loki both stared at me in confusion. I shrugged. "What? They're both a thing, well at least where I'm from."

We then returned to our table, where the pile of files still were. Mobius moved about the endless stacks of files. Mobius then spoke up. "Okay. Kablooie was only sold regionally on Earth from 2047 to 2051. We need to cross-reference that with every apocalyptic event. I'm gonna give you two half. Have a competition, see who finds it."

"Sure." Loki agreed.

"You wanna bet something?" Mobius asked.

Loki nodded. "Yeah."

"Gentleman's bet. Yeah, let's play for pride." Mobius suggested. "Okay, may the best man or woman win. Go."

After about a few minutes of flipping through files, Mobius spoke up. "Anything?"

"Uh, it's not the climate disaster of 2048." Loki replied.

"It's not the tsunami of 2051." I mentioned.

"Let's go, let's go. Come on." Mobius urged.

"2050. The extinction of a swallow...Is that a thing?" Loki asked, looking baffled.

Mobius nodded. "Completely screwed up the ecosystem."

I grimaced. That doesn't sound great. We then continued to flip through the files, skimming through the papers, trying to find Klablooie. However, there was no mention of the candy anywhere.

"Krakatoa erupted in 2049 as well. No Klablooie." Loki said with a sigh.

"God, it's just one damn thing after another, isn't it." Mobius commented with a grim look.

"It's awful...How do these people survive?" I questioned as I flipped through more files. "They go through cyclones, famine, floods, volcanoes..."

"Got him." Loki announced.

Mobius and I both looked over at Loki, who continued as he raised the file he held in his hand. "That's where he is."

Loki gave us a smile, looking proud. I read the top of the file. "Alabama, 2050."

"You're gonna take my job if I'm not careful." Mobius said.

"Nice job, Loki." I praised.

Upon hearing my words, Loki's smile widened. And I couldn't help but return his smile, being genuinely happy for him.

•••
While waiting for Mobius to convince Renslayer to approve of the mission, I went to the room, which I learned was the Time Theater, where Mobius showed Loki and me our memories and our future through the holoprojector. On the table, I saw my file. Wishing to see my memories from my past, I grabbed the file, finding a giant holodisc. I placed it inside the holoprojector before sitting down behind the desk.

I went through my file, landing on a memory, when I was nine. A nine year old me was running along with Maya, Jinx, Nova, Gida, and Tarom. We ran through the hallways with terrified looks on our faces. We pushed past Jedi Masters, Jedi Knights, padawans, and other younglings alike.

"This is your worst idea ever, Storm!" Jinx shouted.

"Yet you all decided to join in on the prank." I shot back.

"We should've recorded the look on Master Kota's face." Maya mentioned.

At that moment, Master Rahm Kota ran out into the hallway. His once long gray hair was now bright pink and he looked furious. The Jedi Knights, padawans, and younglings around him snickered and laughed. But one glare from Master Kota and all their snickers and laughter died at once.

I wasn't sure why I thought it would be a good idea to prank him. At the time, he was in charge of the Wolf Clan. And Master Kota was feared by many younglings, being seen as gruff, cold, and mean. But of course that didn't stop me from wanting to mess with him...not that it was a great idea. As soon as he saw us, he ran faster, trying to catch up with us.

"Come back here you group of no good nerve burning, fire-brand, womp rats!" Master Kota snapped.

"We're farkled!" Tarom exclaimed.

"No, we're not. I have a plan!" I announced.

Gida, Jinx, Maya, Nova, and Tarom all groaned. "Oh no."

"Oh come on. Give me a chance." I pleaded.

"We did, Storm. That's why we're in this mess in the first place." Gida protested.

"Then give me another chance. I won't fail this time." I assured them.

Tears filled my eyes as I stared at the hologram on the wall. Back when things were simpler, back when I got along with Jinx and had both my sisters at my side along with my friends. And now? Now I had a bad feeling I lost everyone...I was alone.  

"So you were mischievous as well." A familiar voice rang out.

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