AN: I can't believe that this story has over 2K reads *uncontrollably sobbing* Thank you so so so much! Thank you for reading what my weird brain creates. Thank you for commenting. Thank you for voting. THANK YOU! You're the best <3
is it still going realistic?
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Jensen and I got ready for the next scene. He flashed me an encouraging smile before he tapped my back and turned into Dean Winchester. It was fascinating. One moment he was that weird, funny man from texas who was always there for me and who meant to world to me and the next moment he was that broken character that had been gone through so much.
He was a fabulous actor.
"So ..." Dean scratched his head and sat down next to Castiel, looking for suitable words to use. "The things I am feeling ... They're real, am I right?"
Castiel couldn't breathe properly. He'd knew that they'd talk, but he'd never expected it to actually happen. Dean was great in avoiding things, so he hadn't thought they would get to talk about it in the next ten years. He searched for words in his brain, anything he could respond with, without sounding like a proper idiot.
He felt a lump growing in his throat. In front of him on the desk stood a glass of water. He gladly took a sip and somehow managed to look at Dean. Castiel nodded. "I think so."
Dean tilted his head and Castiel wished he could know what his friend was thinking. 'Friend,' he thought pensively. Could he still call him that? Where they really friends?
The fingers that he could feel almost imperceptibly brushing over the back of his hand, proved him wrong. Castiel lifted his gaze, looking into emerald green eyes.
"So ... What are we going to do now," Dean asked quietly.
Cas shrugged his shoulders. How should he know what they should do in this situation? He had never felt anything for anyone. Dean was the one who knew things. "I don't know, Dean. What kind of things are you feeling? I think we should get that answered first." Cas didn't know what had given him the strenght to say this, but he was slightly proud of himself. A little smirk appeared on his lips.
"You exactly know what feelings I'm talking about, Cas." A dark flame blazed in Dean's eyes, scaring Castiel.
Cas shook his head slowly, looking at his fingers. They seemed to be very interesting in this situation. They were long and fine structured. His fingertips were tingling as he thought about running them through Dean's hair.
Castiel rubbed his hands slightly over the fabric of his trousers.
He cleared his throat before he decided to answer Dean. "I think I am not really aware of what you're trying to tell me." Well, that wasn't true. He knew exactly what Dean was trying to say.
The hunter rolled his eyes dramatically. "You're kidding me, right?" Dean moved closer to Castiel, taking the angel's hand into his. Castiel could feel the warmth of the Winchester running through his veins. His breathing doubled, unable to do anything.
"I think you're hot and you turn me on." Dean then said with a neutral voice, suddenly and totally unexpected.
Castiel didn't know what to say. The only thing that went through his mind was that Dean was only attracted to the vessel Cas was posessing. Of course he was. He couldn't stand Castiel's true nature. He couldn't touch him nor feel him.
This was painful for Cas. Even though he hadn't expected anything else, he was really hurt. He couldn't look at Dean anymore. The smell emanating from him made Castiel feel really sick. All he wanted was to leave and never come back. Something in him broke.
"But ...," Dean continued. "It's not only that, Cas." He lowered his voice to a minimum. "I can talk to you, like I've never talked to anyone before." It would have been hard to understand Dean if Castiel was a human. "You ... you complete me, Cas."
The angel looked up, tears in his eyes. This was going so well for him now. Dean gently cupped Cas' chin with his fingers, stroking the strong jawline with his index finger.
Castiel bit his lower lip, trying to look everywhere but into Dean's eyes. "I don't know what to say, Dean." That was true. He was overwhelmed by how this conversation was going. He had been fancying Dean for so long. "I like you," he whispered.
"I like you too, Castiel."
Dean's breathing got havier, his heartbeat quadrupled. Castiel - the shy, innocent but yet powerful angel in the size of a skyscraper - rested his hand on Dean's cheek, slightly stroking it with his thumb.
The both men had done those things before, but it felt different now - for both of them. Well, it was different. More intense and genuine. Dean nuzzled his cheek in Castiel's palm, closing his eyes. He tried to get his racing heart under control.
Castiel, however, wanted Dean to kiss him. Pressing his back into the couch with his heavy, musculed body. The desire was unbearable and made his chest hurt. He wasn't sure if it was because Dean was poisoning him or because this was just a really intensive moment. It didn't matter anyway. Cas was with Dean.
Cas finally knew for sure that his feelings were reciprocated by the older Winchester.
Something inside Dean got scared as he opened his eyes and looked at Castiel's face. His eyes were still closed and a slight, joyful smile played on his light pink lips. He looked so happy - finally! Dean would never be able to hurt this beautiful creature again. He'd give his life to protect him from anything.
If Dean would only know what the future held for them.
"CUT!"
I let my hand fall into my lap, pulling my eyebrows together. Somethig about this scene should have been different. I slid my hand into the pocket of Castiel's trousers and pulled out a page from the script, re-reading the part we've just filmed. "Should we do the scene where Cas puts his hand on Dean's cheek differently," I asked Jensen who was still sitting across from me.
He grabbed the pages out of my hands and read through them. "I should have done it differently, but you did it perfectly." A smile appeared on his face for a short amount of time.
"Thank you, but please be honest," I teased. Sometimes I wasn't so sure if he actually meant it or not (probably the same other way round). The director, however, told us that we didn't need to do the scene again.
Jensen smiled, touched my knee incidentally and left saying, "Be right back. You get ready for the next scene." His deep, demanding voice echoed through my body and left goosebumps on my arms.
A few days later Castiel had to leave because his brothers needed him - at least, that's what he had told Sam and Dean. Dean and Castiel had spent every night after their talk together on Dean's bed, talking about random stuff, teasing each other about the amout of times they've already died and discussing some old legends about monsters.
No kisses. They just couldn't get over themselves and do it. It was weird now. Not in an awkward way, but both of the two men couldn't tell what it was that made them be like this.
The only thing that had happened was Cas accidentally grabbing Dean's inner thigh as he had tried to stop himself from falling off the bed. The look he'd given Dean was so innocent and apologetic Dean had started laughing. As he'd noticed the watering eyes of his counterpart, he'd put his arm around Cas and pulled him closer to himself.
Dean gave Castiel a tight hug before the angel could leave without a word. "I will miss you," he murmured into Cas' ear, sending chills up his spine.
"I won't be gone for too long, I promise."
The Winchester nodded and pulled away, letting go of his ... friend-friend? Within a blink Cas was gone. The loneliness lulled him immediately. He jumped on his bed, stroking the empty side of it which Castiel had laid on a few hours ago.
'Oh, Cas, what are you doing to me,' he asked himself and closed his tired eyes.
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I had to stop writing a few times while writing this chapter, because of all the destiel feels. Guys, you're not suffering alone! I am suffering myself. Poor me. Poor you. Poor us.
But we can get through it! We are strong! We've survived almost 10 seasons of supernatural. Okay, okay, okay enough talking.
Tell me what you think yes? Leave a comment and a vote please! Love you loads xx
THE GAY IS REAL!