speak now | grayson dolan

chapter ten: look what you made me do

mackenzie

The sex was a mistake. Just a one-time, major mistake.

I repeat those words all morning long until I halfway believe them. It's already been two days since Grayson did very dirty things to my body. We text here and there, but you can tell there is sexual tension between us now.

I keep trying to make excuses and justify my behavior. So what? I had one out of body experience and finally gave into casual sex. I don't normally do that, but it already happened.

Plus it wasn't with a complete stranger. It was with my best friend since fourth grade. That makes it a little better, right? I don't have romantic feelings for Grayson. It's simply a very hot attraction that has recently surfaced between us.

I believe in summer flings and that's all it was. It won't happen again. It was a fleeting moment of weakness, but now we can continue on with our friendship. I know what Grayson's like in bed, so my curiosity has been solved.

But I wish he wasn't so damn good at it. I've been lying to him a lot lately, because it clearly was the best sex I've ever had. Richie and Scott were good, but nothing like Grayson. He knew exactly how to make me feel electrified. Maybe it's because he's known me for so long.

Dammit, I hate that I'm still thinking about it. No matter how badly I try to think about something else, Grayson's rough touches, kisses, and caresses keep coming to mind.

Distracting myself has been helpful, to an extent. I made myself some promotional posters and booked a few gigs already. A couple requested I take photos of them on the beach, which I would never decline. I love jobs like that, it makes me feel wholesome and inspired.

I'm already setting everything up for the shoot tomorrow and emailing with the girl who reached out to me. I also added more pictures to my vision board and cleaned my room.

Feeling productive, and wanting a reward for the week I had, I head over to Flo's for a milkshake and some waffle fries. I need to unwind and clear my head.

Jade is at work and the boys are most likely playing football on the beach, so today I'm treating myself and spending time reflecting on my recent sins. Maybe this will help me get over my Grayson dilemma, especially since I won't be seeing him.

However, luck is never on my side. The second I walk into Flo's I see him sitting in a booth near the back. I debate whether or not I should leave and just grab food somewhere else, but he suddenly looks up at me.

I can literally feel myself being pulled toward him, as if I'm not in control of my own actions. I take one step, then another, and before I know it I'm sitting in front of him.

"Hi honey." Mae sends me a sweet smile while approaching our booth. "Should I put in your usual order?"

"Today I'll just have a vanilla milkshake with extra whipped cream and waffle fries, please." I grin at her.

"Coming right up." My favorite waitress winks before walking away.

Grayson looks at me and raises his brow up. "Wasn't expecting to see you in here so early."

"And I wasn't expecting you to be in here alone. Where's Ethan and Adam?" I look around the diner, wondering if they'll pop up at any moment.

"At the gym. They need to look good for their double date tonight."

"Double date?" I furrow my eyebrows.

"Yeah, you would know if you hung out with us." He smirks at me and I roll my eyes. "Adam's talking to a girl he met online and she has a hot friend. That's why Ethan's going."