COLLATERAL LOVE

CHAPTER 1

ESETHU

Life has been really tough, and very unkind to me for the past 8 months I lost my job few days after finding out the news that broke my heart. I was working as a bank manager, but I got fired without any warning given apparently I've been stealing money of which is not true, and it was useless to take the to CCMA it was going to be useless. I know that Andile had something to do with it, after all he was the one who pulled in few strings for me and got me this job, after all I had no qualifications. He is a business, no one never say No to him when he offers them money to make things happen for him. Andile kicked me out of the house, I had to make space for the Queen of the house. The one who gave my husband wait, ex-husband to be precise a child. If that was not enough my parents disowned me, angisho phela I ruined my marriage. I've failed giving my ex-husband a child for 7 years, hhe. I am cursed because I'm the only one who is childless in all the females in my family, they don't take me serious, even the little ones disrespect me, I am called a barren everywhere I go, it's not nice at all, but I am getting used to it. Oh, the newly-weds now have a baby boy, a son, what Andile always wanted. He wanted his first born to be a son, the universe granted him his wish. Now, I am working at wimpy as a waiter. My heart haven't healed from that betrayal, that's the reason why I don't have friends, I fear for history to repeat itself. Men hardly look my way, I don't blame them though. I look untidy and my weight has tripled from what I used to look like. I am an introvert & antisocial. Music & writing are my escape from depression and any other anxieties out there. Life doesn't really favour me any more, and I'm fine with that. I have build this strong wall for myself, no one can easily break it down. I hardly smile, even at work is hard giving fake smiles all day, but the money pays my rent and by me grocery, so I have to suck it up and serve the rude customers.

Today is my day off, and that means lazing around. This lazing around also contributes to my weight gain, from size 30 to size 36. Haike, it doesn't help that I also have a belly, one would swear that I'm 7 pregnant. I think it's time I visited the gym, this is not healthy, but today I take the decision of tiding my room. It doesn't look like a woman's room, one would think that it is a storage. This room is very small, perfect for me and my single bed. I have two plates, one cup, one fork-knife-spoon-teaspoon, and 3 pots. Phela I never have visitors over. I take all my dirty clothes and put them in the laundry basket, and started cleaning my room. I open my closet, and clothes just fall out from it, technology madoda, I fold all of my clothes nicely, and re pack them in my closet. I take out the box of pizzas, burgers & bottles of wine under the bed, and go and throw them in the pile of rubbish right outside the yard. The dumping truck is coming today. I look at my room, and it looks clean. Everything is set accordingly, perfect. I always order food via Mr D, but today I am going to the mall to buy myself food. Actually, I need to do my grocery, and do away with the junk. I take a bath, and wear my oversized T-shirt with my boyfriend jeans, and slippers. I comb my weave it is so old, iyoh, I put on some make-up and head to the mall. Downtown is forever packed, every time when I go there I come back with a heavy headache. My first stop will be at pick n Pay, I can't afford Woolworths any more, sigh, such is life though.

★»★«

LONDIWE

This has to be one of the messiest divorce I've ever handled. This couple is just extreme, their demands are too much, and if they don't come to a conclusion in 2 weeks time about a way forward, I am dropping them. I pack up my bag, I have another meeting in 2 hours with another client who wants to divorce his wife. This job is not fun, shit is exhausting. My phone rings, and it is my mother. What does she want now? I grit my teeth before answering.

“Mama”.

“When are you coming to see us? It's been 6 months for Christ's sake Londiwe”.

Me: “Is Esethu back home”? I hear her sigh.