CHAPTER 15

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Rose's POV

I used to think a memorial was something nice and beautiful for people. An event to remember them.

To finally say goodbye.

I don't think so right now.

I am terrified of finally being able to talk about Connor. For everyone to realize how broken I am.

How terrible my life has turned out.

Parents gone.

Brother gone.

Everything just...gone.

I am not ready to finally be standing there listening to everyone talk about him.

I don't want to.

I am afraid to finally realize how fucked up my life is. To know that he is dead.

That he got killed and I couldn't do anything about it.

Lorenzo already asked Jones to lend us the big salon for the memorial. People have already offered to speak, but I haven't.

I don't think I can. My mental state isn't prepared to talk and think about him. My anxiety can get worse and I can't explain the pain I go through. Just the feeling of my lungs exploding, my head hurting, just my entire body shaking and feeling on fire.

But I am doing this for him.

I grab the black dress Amanda left me in my room. It was a beautiful black dress which wasn't too long but wasn't too short. It is perfect.

Lorenzo and Stephen made sure to call the closest people to him and Amanda made sure to prepare the salon.

I shower, brush my hair, and put my black dress on. I look at myself in the mirror trying to be strong and not to break down.

To have the courage to finally see reality.

I left my brown hair in its natural waves and decided to stay without makeup. I am finally done and we have a few minutes left before we leave.

I stay in my balcony admiring the beautiful sunset. The way the sun goes down makes every color more beautiful. The wind blows and I take a few breaths closing my eyes and hear nothing but the trees.

To have a little bit of peace.

At least for a few seconds.

I hear my door opening knowing it was Jason. I already knew it was him. I felt his hand go to my waist and I could feel his eyes on the side of my face looking at every inch and every part of my profile. My eyes went towards him.

His gorgeous grey eyes.

He has a little smile plastered on his face and I just smiled back. I moved closer to his body and hugged him tightly.

"It's going to be worthy." He said. I felt his hand go to my check caressing it slowly.

"I know." I said, my voice came out almost in a whisper.

"You don't have to talk if you don't want to." He said. I look back at him taking a deep breath, "It's going to be worth speaking."

"Everyone is already on their way there. I told them you will come with me." He said. I nodded and grabbed his arm and went downstairs towards his car.

After a long ride we finally arrived.

-

Jason's POV

Rose stayed still. She was looking at the people arriving.

She took a deep breath and I could tell she was nervous.

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