Since I have met you!

5. Josh

She was gone. 

She had just left.

 I couldn't believe it. 

And I might not see her again. 

I could feel as we walked with the guide that she was staring at me with her beautiful eyes. I know that she wants me. But this girl is clearly against admitting it and I don't the hell know why. However, the more astonishing thing here is that I want her. And there the problem because I don't know her. Out of nowhere came this girl to me. Into my life and makes my mind going vivid. Was I not the best for her? 

Haven't I reached her top type scalar which she was looking for? 

Have I interpreted this whole scenery completely wrong? 

It was just small talk on the rooftop. Nothing special. Sadly. The tour luckily ended earlier as expected because nobody had any more questions. Apart from me. I would be dying of interest to know what her name was. But who should I have asked? The tour guide. 

So did I, when all the others started to get out of the room into the direction of the exit. "Sorry, I wanted to ask you, if you are knowing the girl, which was on our tour around fifteen minutes ago before she had to leave?" "Oh, you mean that girl. Yeah. She is around here rarely. Most of the time she is staying in the other sector of the college. Just like she would be living here. Haha. If you know what I mean." I didn't know but I was convinced that maybe if I am strolling around at this place more often, I would catch a glimpse of her. That there would be a chance to get more information about her. 

As I was having that kind of feeling from the beginning, I maybe should be concerned about that I might get sick. I am none-stop feeling myself under fire and that is completely driving me nuts. Accordingly, I freeze from head to toe suddenly. I couldn't think straight. I felt dizzy every time I caught her looking at me. But maybe I only caught a simple cold. The problem of getting sick is that my mother would be not proud of me and makes a speech about how irresponsible I am for not wearing the jacket since the beginning. I would be screwed. But an illness with symptoms this fast. Nearly impossible. That couldn't be. Also, it wasn't a feeling of an illness, more of something mental. Something crazy. I wasn't sane. Just like being insane.

As I was strolling slowly through the door, I didn't notice Dean who was standing there. I was so caught in my own mind.

"So that girl found eventually a way in your heart, bro? Impressing.", he said, however I didn't really hear what the intention of his spoken was. As I came slowly back into the reality, I hardly recognized that it was a question which I should have answered. I confusedly asked: "What?" "Oh, you were in your dreamy world with your girl next to your side. Let me ask you this: Did you ran with her hands in hands over a sunset beach this time or did you just look into her eyes and told her how pretty and wonderful she was?", Dean asked aiming to sound like a girl and fluttering with his eyelashes. He looked ridiculous. I started to chuckle immediately as I have seen his girl imitation. "No. Deanna. I haven't.", I made a dramatic pause where he stared at me intensely as he was dying of curiosity what I would say next. So, I didn't want him to wait too long and I added with a bride smile: "Not yet. Maybe later." Suddenly he lighted up that I slightly started to worry about him. "Oh my god, I knew it. I have seen you gleaming happily since you laid eyes on her the first time."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Dean thinks really, I like this girl. Yes, I find her interesting. But neither have we spoken with about anything private, nor have I asked her about her name. I cannot already know if I like this girl. Find someone nice, don't mean the same as being utterly in love with this person. I also told Dean more than twice that I found a girl pretty but never had he been so excited about that. "Why do you interpret too much in this girl? She is a nobody to us." "Maybe I only joked a little bit with you, but if you're so interested in that subject, I don't mind keeping it going." I wish dearly that I would be allowed to hit his face and make this mischievous smile gone. It annoys me.

"Yeah. Dean. I think I head out now. See you tomorrow in school. Hope the day went well.", I said and headed to the exit sign. But Dean would let me go. Chuckling from behind, he shouted: "Wait, for a second. I am coming with you." I stopped till he reached me and then we both left the college.

As we went through the door outside to the main street where I parked my car, Dean started again: "We will have a lovely time here. I can tell." "Who told you that I come with you?", I asked curious, definitely knowing why he said that. "What would you do instead? Sitting at home and listening to your mommy about several little shootings which are not even well paid for the rest of your life? That's what you really want, then go ahead, however keep in mind, one day I, Dean will be more successful than you." Okay, I clearly have to agree that he had a point. Maybe I should reconsider my life after school. I only nodded, still thinking about my living arrangements and my possibilities. Hard to decide. Need indeed more time to think about it.

"Do you wanna grab some coffee and cake before you head home to your mommy?", Dean asked and pointed to the pink coloured shop opposite of the college entry, where we were still staying. "No. I need to go and buy some groceries for my mother. But thanks for asking. Maybe next time."

We did a manly hug and said our goodbyes before I sat in my car and started the engine. For good measures, I started Google maps route right before I began to drove. Just to make sure that I get the main street and then it was pretty easy to get home. The streets were not that full by now, but less traffic would be more relaxing for a time like this. I couldn't concentrate right now. She was in my head constantly.

While I was driving on the main street, I repeated the day which just has happened. This girl was so different. So unusual. And I kind of had missed the chance to meet her if not Dean had called me and convinced me to come to college. I really find her hair kind of stylish. The red was something which no one has this often. Also, her way she acted with others. It's not this girly how others girl act. It's not the maturity either. It's more the relaxed way. She doesn't seem to care what others are secretly thinking about her. She is just herself. But then why did she leave? Should I have given her my cell- number or would that have been too obvious that I wanted to meet her again. I didn't want to look too desperate.

"Now turn to the left street. Bridgestreet. Now turn to Bridgestreet." What did the navigation system tell me, I was on the main street. And there I realised I wasn't anywhere on the main street to my home anymore. I even had to accept that I was so deeply thinking about a girl that I was driving nuts. I was elsewhere around the tenth district and not even near mine. I searched a spot to park my car to GO to the grocery store which I have found. At least I can make my mom happy, when I buy her the fruit, she had asked for to make her delicious smoothie. In the store, I really tried to concentrate, thus I didn't forget anything, and my mom could get mad again.

As I arrived home, the first thing I got to hear from my dearest mother was: "Why are you so late?" Wow, never gone better from there. "I got lost while driving. Okay?", the only truth, I could admit after a long adventurous day. "Didn't you have your GPS with you? There is one downloaded in your phone. Did you use Google maps?", she asked curiously. It was so clear. This is my mother. I should have thought about a better explanation. "Yes, I used Google maps but the shitty voice told me something totally wrong. And then there were plenty of cars on the road which didn't make it easier." She looked convinced and I was proud of that. "Okay you are forgiven. Give me the groceries now and next time, try to concentrate more. You are not a dumb boy. You are mine and that means you cannot get lost with a navigation system. Do you get that?" I nodded while giving her the bag with the groceries. After that I went upstairs immediately to take a cold shower and then lay down in my bed, thinking hopefully for the last time about this girl and try to catch some sleep for tomorrow.

Maybe I will never see her again.

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Sorry, that the next chapter took so long but I've just graduated and it was really stressful the last few months.