Since I have met you!

3. Josh

Oh shit! She is really a student. I was curious why she was walking upstairs. But the reason why was that she met her friends. And her friend. I was standing here with a lump in my throat while she was talking to this piece of.... Asshole! Why did that sight make my blood boil? I don't know her. I can't like her. Anyhow, I have to admit that there was something mysterious with her. Maybe because of her dark aura. Perhaps she has a very bad health issues or leaks under depression or is really bitchy. But her look is so innocent as a bumblebee. I hate the feeling which draws me to her. I have never had the problem. I was the one which makes girl come and go whenever I want. She took my position. 

And then the worst case is that she has a... I don't like to say this word... boyfriend. I could be standing or sitting there and laugh, hug and make her head over heels for me. 

But I could only standing here. Far away from her. I looked straight into the ravishing clear sky thinking about her. This is one of the most amazing views I have ever had in Vienna. It is quite hard to find rooftops to get on because most buildings are closed. Though it is so... "Relaxing, isn't it?", was a girl's voice. A beautiful one. It was hers. 

I was turning to the right and there she was. Standing on the railing and looking over the rooftops of Vienna. With me. My heart melted. "Yeah, it is.", was the only words, I was able to speak. I was amazed and completely out of my mind. It was spinning and spinning but this was not the cause of the height. Then there was only silence. However, it was not weird. It was natural and comforting. Kind of that our minds were speaking with each other but we didn't have to open our mouths. I liked that. 

She was the first one, that broke the silence between us. "I like the view here. To look over the rooftops gives me some escape from the reality downstairs. I often come here when I feel like being alone.", she said softly. That was something she spoke from the depth of her heart. She adores this place here. And I get used to it too. "Yes. It's impressive." "And stunning.", she added, "But let's skip the topic before I get melodramatic. Will you go to this college next year?" Her eyes looked away from the sight directly at me. They were shining with hope. She wants me to be here? With her? "If you want to see me more often here, maybe. But you definitely have to admit that." And right after my answer her face expression skipped. Crap! I fucked up again. That was too much Josh. For once in a while I should try to bridle my tongue. What should I do? Can I take it back? Desperation was rising in me. Why couldn't she just laugh and see it as all the other, as a simple joke? 

"Don't think that you have any effect on me. You are a total womanizer. Nothing special. I know guys like you. All the same." "Then why do you date one?", I asked. I was furious inside and hurt. Why does she think so bad of me because of this one sentence? I'm not like them. I am not like her boyfriend. Why is she even with him when she doesn't like these types? "Oh, I don't date.", she didn't look at me. Instead staring again into the wide ocean of roofs. 

She looked suddenly so small. So sad. Kind of broken and devastated. There was something she had locked deep in her heart and nobody should see it. But why do I like to see this so badly? Or was she just lying. Then she would be a professional artist because I believe everything what she would telling me with this expression. "This guy behind us is not your friend." Yep, I definitely couldn't say "boyfriend" again. The word is too painful while talking about that black-haired girl. "Oh, not at all. Too old for me and not my type." She laughed again. She had a lot of mood swings. That unsettled me. "Okay. So then, yes I might be here next year." Her smile was wide and full of joy. Even her cheeks got a little rouge. And her eyes were shining such as bright as stars. "Nice.", was only what she answered. She had noticed that she was blushing and tried to turn into the other side. Her hair was now for her side face. So that I hadn't the chance to look at her. She was embarrassed and that was cute. No, it's not. You like her. I don't know her. My mind had gone mad.