NCT Imagines (Requests Open!)

Let Her Go Part 4 (Jaehyun)

Everyone deserves a happily ever after.  You wiped your tears and ripped off the necklace Jaehyun had given you.  Everyone but you seemed to live in a fairytale.  And it hurt that you were living in a world of pain while everyone else wore real smiles.

Mark stumbled back inside and leaned against the door frame.  You were sitting on the floor, staring off into space with ruined mascara around your lashes.  Without a word, your son closed the door and took a seat beside you, shedding silent tears with you.  

"We're scared to fall because falling is all we've ever known," you smiled sadly.  "But you don't have to fall anymore."

Mark stared at you with big eyes, trying to understand your thoughts and emotions.  He knew you loved Johnny, now, but Jaehyun was a man you had once loved, too.  It was hard for you to throw away someone who had made you smile like that for years.  Mark was too innocent to understand how complicated love was.

"Let's stop," you brushed a tear from Mark's face.  "Let's stop dragging ourselves through the dirt for someone else.  Let's just run as far as we can and do what we want without worrying about what anyone else thinks."

You staggered to your feet and helped your son up.  "Your past self?  Let him go.  I'll let go of who I was yesterday, too.  I know you, Mark.  You're not into that girl in your class.  You like that boy you always hang out with.  What was his name again?  Haechan?"

Mark blushed fiercely and stared at the ground.

You tilted his chin upwards gently with your finger.  "You don't have to run away from me.  Instead, use those feet to run to him, and tomorrow, don't hesitate.  You shouldn't have to hide your feelings because of someone else.  Run until your feet can't run anymore."

The next morning, Mark found himself waking up with a spring in his step.  It wasn't Valentine's Day anymore, but he decided he wouldn't assign only one day of the year to love someone.  Yesterday, he hadn't confessed to a girl.  Instead, he watched Haechan from afar and tried to approach him and get the words out, but the words never came.

He laced up his sneakers and hopped in the back seat of your car.  You dropped the little one off first and ruffled Mark's hair before leaving him in front of his middle school.

"Don't be afraid to hold onto something that makes you happy," you winked at him.  "I'll see you later, alligator."

"In a while, crocodile," Mark grinned.

"Whoa, is that your mom?" someone asked, and Mark jumped at the familiar voice.  He backed up and saw Haechan with his backpack hanging off one shoulder and his hands tucked into his pockets.

"Um, yeah.  She's the coolest," Mark grinned.  "Do you, um, have your swim team practice after school today?"

"Nope!"

Mark cleared his throat.  "If you have time, wanna grab some coffee?  I know a cool place."

Haechan raised a brow.  "Sounds good, Mark Lee."

"You know my name?" the teenager murmured in awe.

Haechan stepped closer and gave Mark a pat on his back.  "I've always been good with names... especially yours."

Mark bit his lip so hard, he was sure he could taste blood.  As nervous as he was, the boy was terribly excited.  Even after school at the coffee shop, his hands trembled as he tried to balance the cup of coffee he was holding.  

"Agh!  It's so bitter," Haechan made a face as he set his cup down.

Mark pushed some creamer and sugar packets towards him.  "Why settle for bitter coffee when you can have it sweet?"

Johnny smiled to himself from a faraway table in the same café.  Mark is doing well, isn't he?  It was coincidental that he would be meeting you here in a few minutes.  And on cue, you walked through the side entrance and  took a seat in front of him.

"Oh, you got here early," you remarked.  "I thought I would get here before you."

Johnny tapped his watch jokingly.  "Not a chance.   I already ordered your favorite."

"You know my favorite?"

"Hazelnut mocha with two pumps of syrup and extra sugar," the barista said while setting down the mug in front of you.

"How'd you know?" you asked.

Johnny's captivating eyes locked with yours, and you could read the message buried in them.  I know everything about you.  

"I'm sorry about yesterday.  Jaehyun is someone of the past, and I wanted to respect my feelings I had for him back then by wearing the necklace he gave me yesterday.  He sent me an email this morning saying he was moving his family to Spain.  I guess yesterday was his final goodbye."

Johnny nodded.  "I'm sorry, too.  I shouldn't have rushed out like that.  Love drives people to be irrational, and whenever I see you, I feel like the naive college student I was when I first met you.  Suddenly, I became irrational and greedy for time to spend with you."

"Let him go," you nudged a sugar packet towards him and his black coffee.  "The frustrated, angry Johnny of the past?  Let him go.  Be the Johnny you want to be.  I never believed in a happily ever after before I met you."

Johnny was taken aback by your words.  He placed his large hand over your smaller one and grinned.  He didn't need to say anything to express how he felt about you.  

Mark coughed and shifted his eyes away from you at the other table.  Both you and him had fallen so many times, but what mattered was that you were able to get back up and let your past self go.  You were no longer the naive college girl you were when you fell head over heels for Jaehyun.  You were no longer the lady who pretended your husband was still in love with you.  You were no longer the woman who cried when the rest of her family went to sleep.  You were a woman who could understand her dreams and chase them.

"I learned a lot watching my mom," Mark recounted.  "We basically grew up together.  And she taught me to get back up and keep moving no matter how painful yesterday was."'

Haechan listened to him and smiled.  "You're right.  Forget what anyone else thinks.  I have the biggest crush on you, Mark Lee.  So is this our first date?"

Mark spat out the sip of coffee in his mouth.

Haechan smirked.  "I'll take that as a yes."

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A/N: It's really hard to get back up after you fall.  But once you get back up, you'll realize there's so much you can do.  I fell really hard recently.  And I'm still in the process of getting back to my feet, but no matter what anyone says, you can do it!  I believe in you <3 

Question of the imagine: If you could say something to your past self, what would you say?