NCT Imagines (Requests Open!)

The Beauty Within (Winwin)

A/N: This imagine is on the deeper side, and there's a slight trigger warning to anorexia, so please read at your own risk.  If this isn't your thing, feel free to skip to another chapter :)

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You tossed the magazine you were reading on the coffee table in frustration.  Springing to your feet, you changed into your gym clothes- a loose, old tee and some leggings.  Your apartment had a gym on the top floor.  You loved it because the walls were ceiling-to-floor windows, giving you a beautiful view of the Seoul skyline while you worked out.

You were convinced that if you exercised like this at least twice a day, you could look like the girls in those magazines you read and those TV shows you watched.  Your body did have shape but not the shape you wanted.  You were far from what you wanted to be.  You let your thoughts take over you while you ran your three miles on the treadmill.  In the beginning, running that much had left you breathless and drenched in sweat.  Your stomach growled as you stepped off the treadmill, wiping the sweat off your face with a rag.  Like usual, you headed to the locker room to change.  A group of swimmers passed you, and you couldn't help but feel jealous.  They were so skinny and tall and beautiful.  You stared at your reflection in the mirror, grabbing at the sections of fat that hung off your body.  You couldn't stand the sight of it.

You gathered your things and stormed past the group of swimmers.  You were taking all this effort, but why wasn't it working?  Maybe you had to amp it up a little.  So after your gym workouts, you didn't eat, no matter how hungry you were.  In fact, you basically stopped eating altogether.  You grabbed at most one meal a day and a couple of snacks.  And after about six months, you finally saw the results you wanted.  

Smiling at your reflection, you applied a thin layer of foundation and some eyeshadow and blush.  Instead of wearing your usual baggy tee and leggings, you settled for a crop top and high-waisted shorts.  To be honest, the reason you lost all that weight was to impress this one guy in your modern dance class.  His name was Winwin.  You were only taking the class because you had to, but you could tell Winwin had  signed up for the class by his own will.  His body was like water when he danced.  Every single move was so fluid.

When you walked into the practice room where your class was, all eyes were on you.  You smiled, confidently walking to your spot.  The girl behind you looked at you in concern.  

"Oh, you're probably not used to seeing me like this, right?" you laughed.  "Yeah, I've been working on my abs, lately."

Winwin shook his head, making his way over to you.  "Those aren't your abs, Y/N.  Those are your ribs."

You looked down, shaking your head vigorously.  "No, these are my abs," but part of you knew you were lying to yourself.

After class, Winwin came up to you.  "Are you done with classes for the day?"

You nodded.  "Why do you ask?"

"Come with me."  He held your hand and led you to his apartment which you realized was in the same building as yours.  You blushed as he opened the door and pulled you inside, not sure what to expect.  

"Why did you bring me here?" you asked innocently. 

Winwin grabbed an apron hanging by the fridge and tied it around his waist.  "I'm going to cook meals for you.  We'll eat together three times a day.  You're unreasonably skinny.  It's not okay.  You look like you're going to collapse every time you lift a finger."

"But I feel more pretty like this," you argued.

"Is sunken cheeks, your rib cage showing, and feeble ankles that look like they could crack any second pretty?" Winwin asked you.  "I liked you much better before."

You felt frustrated but more angry than anything else.  Your hands automatically balled into fists.  You had spent more than half a year working on your body to impress the guy standing before you, and now here he was telling you you had looked better before.

Unable to hold them back, you let the tears fall.  Winwin had no idea how hard you had worked.  Every time your friends went out to eat, you would tag along because you didn't want to miss out.  You'd watch as they devoured appetizers, entrees, and desserts while you pathetically picked at your salad.  There were nights you skipped dinner in fear of putting on 0.5 of a pound, yet your stomach would growl relentlessly.

"I'm sure you worked hard, but you should realize that beauty isn't just on the outside.  It's the beauty inside that attracted me to you."

"Wha-what?" you asked, wiping the tears away with your hands, and Winwin made his way over to you. 

"You just seem like a really nice person.  You're always helping other people in our modern dance class, and you're naturally funny and super talented.  I've been wanting to be your friend for a while, now."

Friend.  You had to remind yourself that someone with Winwin's caliber of good looks would never fall for you no matter what you did.  Losing all your weight and wearing nice clothes meant nothing.

You looked at yourself in your phone's camera.  Your skin was pulled tightly over your cheekbones, making you look sickly.  You weren't attractive at all.  You had just been lying to yourself all this time.  You were pulled out of your thoughts when Winwin placed a plate of food in front of you- galbi with some japchae on the side.  You took a bite, and just like that, all your worries melted away.  His cooking was divine.  

"You made this?" you asked in disbelief, and Winwin wiped his hands on his apron, nodding.

Over the course of the next three months or so, the two of you kept meeting up for meals.  It became something both of you looked forward to instead of a chore.  You were watching him cook one evening, smiling fondly as he worked hard on his plating.  He stepped back, admiring the dishes he had made before handing the two plates to you.  But before you could turn around to place them on the table, he cupped his hands around your face and placed his lips gently on yours.  With the two plates of food in your hand, you couldn't really resist, or the food would fall.  

He pulled away, smoothly taking the plates from you and setting them on the table himself.  You still stood there, blinking in shock, and Winwin guided you to your seat, helping you sit down.  

"So, we're dating now, right?" he asked, and all you could do was nod your head.  "Good.  Now try the dish I made, and tell me if you like it.  I worked really hard on making it look good."

You laughed, eating a spoonful.  "It's the beauty within that counts."

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A/N:  OMG okay I'm so sorry for not being to upload as often as I'd like to.  Round 2 of exams has hit, and I've been spending my days and nights in the library.  I don't think my schedule is supposed to clear up for a while, but I will continue posting whenever I have time, so thank you for being patient!! :)  

Thanks @winwinsslut for requesting this imagine.  It really reminded me that beauty does indeed come from within.  A beautiful personality is much more powerful than an outward appearance.  And all of you are beautiful <3  Also, could you tell I love My Secret Romance from the kiss scene?  

Question of the imagine: What is your favorite thing to cook?  I know this is such a random question after such a deep imagine, but I'm really curious haha!  My favorite thing to make is chocolate chip pancakes.  Sometimes, I make them for breakfast for my friends, and it makes me feel better if I'm having a bad day :)