What We Do In the Shadows: "Jen..."

What We Do in The Shadows: "Jen..." Part LXVII...

What We Do In The Shadows: "Jen..."

Summary: There are unexpected consequences when Laszlo seeks a new human familiar...

Part LXVII...

Nandor in his crypt, seated by coffin in battle uniform sans armor, sword at the ready, to camera...

"Yes, I am troubled by the plight of this foolish young lady, granddaughter times who knows to our natural foe. I cannot conceive why Van Helsing has not possessed her and made her flee or better yet, had her kill Devious or summoned his people to rescue her from his clutches. I suppose it could be a clever stratagem?" he ponders. "She deceiving Simon to gain his confidence, though why wait to kill him? But if this is for our Redemption, please, Doctor..." anxious cry to the walls. "Do not risk your dear granddaughter of many times for us...Or rather, our souls." Eyes camera, shrugging. "We met them the other night by the way, purely by accident involving our dearly beloved gypsy slut and her ancient ghost boyfriend with whom she has cheated on Laszlo, with his awareness, it seems, for centuries." Rolling eyes...Modern couples... "In my day, if one of my thirty-seven wives had made the whoopie with another fellow...The divorce, permanent style..." (Cut to shot of sword swooshing down).

Slight sly smile... "Well, perhaps not all of them...Irena could always get around me. And it could get very boring for them, awaiting my return from battle and mass slaughter."

"Anyway, the Souls manifested and each claimed unfinished business but made no mention of Redemption or Van Helsing or why they have been appearing to us in various objects such as mirrors and windows. Nadja has persuaded hers to stay on, claiming to wish to talk, but secretly to learn more from them." Sigh... "I know it's assumed souls are your innocent and trustworthy side but in fact they can be deceptive and all are very confusing as well as multidimensional, so concerned with more than the earthly plane...Though we seemed to be meeting the more earthly plane aspect the other night. Laszlo's was strictly concerned with self-gratification..." frown. "As I might have expected...Jen and Miss Jacqueline, our new maid/enthrallee, poor girls, have been spending hours cleaning his 'mess' from the ceiling. Ectoplasm, my ass." Glare. "Still, it is strange they would not give us mention of Van Helsing. Nadja believes they are afraid we would intervene to stop Redemption and that they wished to lull us into the untrue sense of security."

Frown... "One's soul should be honest with one. Still it was a delight to meet mine and to see our horse, John, again." Sudden blink.

My dear...OW!... "Damn! I was only thinking the word, G...OWW!" he cries. "Hmmmn...Anyway, this could be important. My John manifesting now...He always used to come charging riderless into the battle when he sensed me in danger, after I would go on on foot to share the danger with my infantry. They like that, you know...The general showing he is willing to march on foot with them. It can be risky if they think you've been killed rather than fallen or stopped to take a piss, even fatal of course and was, to me, once, but...Yes, John is here to rescue me and my Soul. He senses the danger...Hmmn? Oh, I don't know...Eternal Damnation of Soul and Essence, perhaps?" ponders.

"Yes, our Souls were feeling us out...Laszlo's quite literally." Frown. "Still, our Laszlo Cravensworth agrees with me. We must learn more from them and from the Devious One about his negotiations with our enemy...Frienemy? Is that how they say it? Friend/enemy? Yes."

"I wish Guillermo were here. He may be poorly educated and rather slow but his mind is open to possibilities and he has the vivid imagination. I should call him in Mexico today. I can just say I am his project, old geratric man patient Nandor Relentless, calling for him because I cannot find my senility medications." Smiles. "I hope he and Miss Susan are enjoying beautiful Mexico...I was never there, no, but I saw that on a poster in a movie in the 1940s. I should go speak to Nadja and see if her soul in doll has confessed anything important. Excuse me, always very nice talking with you. Make sure Jacqueline serves you coffees and teas." He rises straight up, then heads out of crypt, walking.