Rain

Revelations

Sometimes the past is something you can't let go of. And sometimes the past is something we'll do anything to forget.

-Meredith Grey

She didn't know how Mark convinced her to come here. The airport was just as she remembered it as Everett squirmed in her arms. The baby had been quiet throughout the plane ride but now he was beginning to become restless. He was tired.

So was she.

"I know, Ev," she mumbled as she grabbed her luggage off the conveyor belt. Unlike last time, no one waited for her. No Harper Avery, no friends, nothing.

No Tom.

This was going to be harder than she thought. She wished Mark was here but he was busy with his father and had assured her that Kepner would keep in touch as she became sort of an interim Chief Resident.

Walking to the taxis, she crossed the road and was about to enter a yellow cab when there was a call of her name.

"Emily!" Head snapping up, she saw Theresa there with her minivan. Smiling slightly, she headed over. "Didn't Noah tell you I was coming?"

"Nope." At that, Theresa rolled her eyes and opened the door for her tired sister-in-law. "He's been busy." The pediatrician's smile disappeared and was replaced by a sympathetic expression. "I can't believe this is happening."

"I never knew you came from an Italian family," Theresa began to say after they settled Everett into the car seat and began the drive to the Moore household. Emily was quiet, stiff with the thought of her mother. "Noah's never mentioned it to me."

"No one mentions it. It's an unspoken rule," she said shortly. "It's not something we like to remember." Theresa had a quiet smile on her face and shook her head. Emily didn't find the humour in the situation. "What?"

"You two are so similar. It's crazy," she commented. "You and Noah. And I've said it before, but there are moments when you guys really are siblings," she clarified after a moment when Emily glared at her. The name Andrew echoed in her head. "Not you and your... half siblings."

"There's more than one?" Emily asked sharply and she jamed an open palm into the glove compartment in front of her, causing the contents to rattle. Her wrist blossomed, hot with pain that seeped into her bones.

"Yeah..." At first, Theresa was hesitant but when hazel met green, she turned her gaze back to the road and added, "A son and a daughter."

"No!"

"Emily-"

Hot shame and anger washed over her as Emily pitched forward, hands digging through her hair. She was replaced. Her mom left and replaced her because Noah and her somehow... they messed up. And Dad... Dad messed up. He screwed someone on the side, left Mom and married her instead. And Mom disappeared because she couldn't take it. All the rage from being abandoned flooded her in full force. She was the problem. That would make sense.

That's why her mom replaced her.

A son and a daughter to replace the fuck-ups.

She was the problem.

Fat tears welled in her eyes, and when she blinked, they fell over the chasm and down her wrists and into her mouth. Theresa was quiet, just driving and she couldn't help but try to stifle her sobs. Emily sniffed noisily, gazing blearily at the black smudges that marred her skin as she wiped away her tears.

"Why?" she whispered and her mind was such a mess that she could barely speak.

She was the problem.