Mercury

Thirteen

Dean lit up his cigarette as Mercury wrapped herself in his hoodie. It was warm and smelt like cigarettes and whatever cologne the boy coated himself in. It was nice, earthy and clean. They sat together in her room after the incident. After Max's body had fallen to the ground in a slump she had turned to Dean and said; "I want to go home please." In which he had replied with nothing more than a nod and with her direction driven her back.

"Do you like it?"
He looked back at her blankly as he stood against her doorframe, one hand now tucked into his pocket.
"Beating people up. Do you like it?"

They said nothing after that and he blew out a cloud of smoke before taking a seat next to her on the floor at the foot of her bed. "Most of the time."
She shut her eyes then inhaling shaky breaths as the vision of Dean smashing Max's head like a six year old playing with an old doll came to her mind. "Why?"
They both didn't look at eachother as she heard another flicker indicating that he was lighting up another one. "Well, why are you so narcissistic?" Her eyes widened at him slightly , causing her to finally make eye contact with him. She thought that connecting eyes with him would make her cower back in fear, see the devil in his eyes, but she didn't. And she remained as calm as before as his eyes looked back at hers.

"You're really fucked in the head. I'm going to tell the bloody police and we'll see who's making the smart rem-" a hand clasped tightly against her mouth as her eyes widened like a porcelain doll.
"No you won't." He looks at her coyly as he removed his hand. "If you wanted to. You would have. Does it excite you?"

"Does what excite me?"
"Seeing someone else suffer?"

She thought about it then. 

Mercury suffered a lot. Internally and externally. There were the on and off voices in her head that liked to alter her self worth and the external hits and words from her parents that continued to hammer away at her skin. Beautiful perfect Mercury sufferer. In indictible ways compared to others. She suffered from neglect, she wished her parents would barge in her room scolding her for bringing a boy home. But they wouldn't. Because they didn't care. She suffered from the fear of abandonment which made her resent lack of attention amongst her fellow peers therefore she fed on it like a leech sucking onto every person she knew. 

Did she enjoy the suffering of someone who wasn't her? Would she be happy to see her father on his knees and her mother laying out on the floor begging for mercy?

For anyone who tormented her to bow down to the throne for she was the goddess so unique that they all should awe at her beauty?

"I don't know."
And that was the truth.

"Well I think it does." He clicks his tongue as he runs his fingers through his hair. Truthfully he wasn't sure where the conversation or situation was going. They still remained on the ground sitting next to eachother, shoulders touching.
He stood up suddenly, putting his hand out to hers even though she looked like she was about to pass out. "I don't want to sleep yet."

"Okay."
She clasps his ring clad hand allowing him to easily pull her up. Their eyes connect in an unspoken language as she lets go of his hand. They walk out of her room into the kitchen where she grabs her dads bottle of bourbon. Dean grabs raids her fridge before finding a tub of strawberry yoghurt and taking it before searching the drawers for a spoon. They say nothing to eachother as he eats the delight that he rarely has and she drinks the drink that reminded her of the devil in her life.

The light shone through the window dancing on them both making them look like stars next to moonlight. They make their way to the living room with the only light being from the night sky outside. "I'd like to think that sometimes people need to be punished. Like punishing people for their sins rids me of my own..." his voice speaks out into the silence and he snatches the bottle from her before taking a sip of his own. They sit on the floor on opposite ends of the coffee table passing the drink between eachother.

"I'm reckless and genuinely don't give a shit about life. I can't complain about life when I'm not going to make it past thirty, it makes sense for me to sit at home smoking or being an anarchist within a boring town." For the first time Dean couldn't stop his rambling and this was the most Mercury had ever heard him say. "I like smoking. It fills the void within my chest and... and-" he stops himself then. He wasn't sure where he was going. Mercury didn't make him continue, she didn't stop him either. In fact she didn't say anything. Sometimes it was best not to be rude, or not to try to be comforting when you can't. That's what Mercury decided on. So instead solemnly she passes him the bottle signalling that he can have the last of it. He does. He finishes the rest as soon as she passed it to him, he didn't care about her thoughts. He couldn't really remember what he had just said. It was odd really, the circumstance in which they were in. In which they were always in. Neither minded.

"I'm not scared or anything. I've seen death too many times which explains why I'm not numb when. When yeah- you know."

"That's alright."

Mercury was starting to enjoy Dean's company, however that might have just been the alcohol talking.

They both lie down flat on their backs staring up at the living room lights. "The ceilings quite shit compared to your room isn't it?"

She grins at this, although he can't see that it meets her eyes. "Should we get toast tomorrow?"

"Toast?" He mumbles back at her, she chuckles drowsily as she pops up over the coffee table to look at him. "Like beans on toast?"
She nods her head and a soft blush coats her cheeks. The blush confused the both of them as she moved to lay down next to him. Her heart was beating fast as the both stared at the beige ceiling. His hand over his chest and hers tucked into the sleeves of his hoodie.

"Alright."

Then they slept. Not sure whether they were so bothered about how comfortable they were with eachother, and not sure about the monsters that they were encouraging to be released within eachother.