Uppercut (A James Maslow FanFic)

Chapter 27

Chapter 27

The past few days had been rough. I hadn’t been sleeping well. I lacked the motivation to get any of my school work done. I couldn’t remember the last time I ate a full meal. To sum everything up, I was a mess.

I knew that it wouldn’t be healthy to continue lounging around the house like this, feeling hurt, angry, and confused. I knew that I had to stop worrying and stressing myself out, but I just couldn’t stop myself from thinking about Ashton and what he had said to me. I was in desperate need of a distraction to nudge me back into a normal lifestyle.

It was only 5:30pm and I was already laying in my bed with a quilt pulled up to my chin. So many emotions had run through my body in the past week or so, that I was unable to feel them anymore. My whole body felt numb except for a dull ache in my chest, right where it had been ripped open after my unpleasant conversation with Ashton. The gloomy weather outside allowed only minimal amounts of light to shine in through the windows of my room. The lamp on my bedside table helped to cast a soft glow throughout the space.

Despite it being dinner time, I didn’t feel like eating. I didn’t want to sit at the table with my family and deal with them continuously stealing glances at me to make sure I was alright. I knew they were all being affected by this situation too, but I didn’t want to see the changes it caused in their moods and actions. I would much rather just wait until they all went to bed, or something, and eat by myself.

James hadn’t been too happy when he found out about my visitor. I was so afraid that he would start yelling at me again because of it. To my delight, he hadn’t. He just sat in silence as various emotions flashed across his face and his muscles tensed. At first I had been scared of what he might do after hearing the news. I didn’t want to deal with Ashton showing up here again because of my brother. At this point, I no longer cared if he went hunting him down. As long as I didn’t have to deal with anymore surprise visits, it didn’t matter to me. I just wanted all of this to disappear.

Unexpectedly, my bedroom door creaked open, pulling me away from my thoughts and back to reality. I felt my stomach sink at the sound. I didn’t want to deal with another round of my mother’s how-are-you-holding-up talks. I just wanted to be able to think about something else for once and not about Ashton. After a moment’s hesitation, I slowly turned my head to see who had come to check on me. To my surprise, I ended up locking eyes with Alex. He stood just outside my door with one hand on the door handle, peaking in at me. I watched as he gave a small, sympathetic smile.

I wanted to return the gesture but I didn’t have it in me. All I could do was watch as he approached and sat down next to me on the bed, leaning up against the headboard.  I instantly felt some of the tension that had built up inside me disappear. And even though I was still too numb to show it, I was extremely happy to see him. 

I shifted my current position in order to be closer to Alex, desperate for the comfort that I was so used to receiving from him. I pulled myself up, dragging the blanket along with me, and leaned my head against his torso. I closed my eyes, allowing myself to enjoy the small trickle of relief that I could sense flowing into my body. My chest still ached but, it seemed more bearable. 

Alex said nothing as he wrapped a reassuring arm around me. It was obvious that he had been informed about my current condition. Although this definitely wasn’t the worst state he’d seen me in, it felt so relieving to have him near me. Just talking to him over the phone about my problems hadn’t been quite the same.

We continued to sit there, just like that. It wasn’t necessary for us to speak to know what the other wanted to say. Alex didn’t want to repeat the same things that I had already heard so many times since all of this began. He didn’t tell me about how everything was going to be okay because we both knew that nothing would be exactly the same after this. I wouldn’t have believed him even if he tried. He was just here for support, trying the best he could to let me know I could count on him to add some normality back into my life.