I'm Okay

Chapter 5 - Im sorry

Nastuo answered a call he received "Hey Fuyumi, what's up?" He asked through the phone.

Shoto couldn't hear their conversation but didn't bother to listen in "Yeah I don't mind and I'm pretty sure Sho won't either" With the mention of his name, he faced Nastuo.

"I'll be there, don't worry" Nastuo hung up "What did she say?" Shoto asked. "Fuyu doesn't have a ride to go home so I'm gonna go pick her up, that okay?" Nastuo replied, the teen hummed in response.

—

"Hey Shoto! Nastuo! Over here!" Fuyumi waved towards the two as they walked towards her "Hey Fuyumi" Both greeted.

The three got in the car and Nastuo proceeded to drive towards the dorms "Sorry I didn't come home..." Fuyumi apologized, Shoto didn't really care so he just ignored her. The teen would often ignore his siblings and keep distance since they'll try to get close. Shoto knows they only want to help but the teen didn't want them to get involved, he didn't want them to get involved with him, with training, he didn't want to see them get hurt.

"How are your injuries?" Fuyumi asked trying to break the silence, Shoto proceeded to ignore her and look out the window.

"You're the only one I can pass this technique to! Don't be weak! Stop being so weak!"

"I beg you father! I can't take this anymore! Plea-agh!" The teen was met with a blow to the stomach.

"That's for not listening, I'll punch you harder next time" Enji grabbed the teens hair and forced him up "You are the only one! Touya was almost perfect! Almost but he inherited Rei's weak constitution! Now get the hell up you poor excuse for a son!"

"Shoto? Whats wrong? Why aren't you talking?" Shoto snapped out of his thoughts, he turned to his left to face Fuyumi who had a concerned look on her face.

Father mentioned...Touya, Touya was...

"Shoto?" Fuyumi called out "Yeah?" The teen asked "What's wrong? You looked troubled, are you okay?" Okay? Of course I'm not okay, you know that already "I'm Fine." Shoto replied   sounding a bit annoyed proceeding to look out the window.

If he was being honest, the teen was starting to get annoyed.

"Shoto? Want to talk?"

"Hey Sho? You okay little bro?"

He didn't like the questions his siblings would ask him after training. They would always ask the stupidest questions like 'are you okay?' But they know the answer already. Of course he's not okay, he never is. Why would they even bother asking? What's the point? What are they trying to get at? Shoto never knows anything anymore, he questions his own existence, he questions the point in living, he questions life in general.

Lifting it up slightly, the teen faced his left hand. "We're here" Shoto opened the car door and rushed to the entrance of the dorms, the teen didn't even bother saying goodbye "Hey Sho?! Wait!" Nastuo and Fuyumi went to chase after him.

"Shoto!" Fuyumi called out trying to keep up with Nastuo who started to sprint.

Shoto was tired, really tired. The teen just wanted to be in his room, where it's safe, where no one could bother him. He made it to the door but a hand grabbed his shoulder, he turned around and saw Nastuo and Fuyumi "Why did you just leave like that?!" Fuyumi said gasping for air "She's right, why would you just leave? Is there something wrong? You okay?" Nastuo asked. There it was again, asking if he's alright, asking if there was something wrong. Shoto slapped Nastuo's hand away "Sh-" Shoto cut him off before he could say anything "Leave me alone" he said before walking towards the door.

"Shoto please! We just want to help you! If there's something wrong then tell us!" Fuyumi yelled, the teen stopped and faced the two "Help? How are you going to help?! There's nothing you can do to help me! I'm stuck here for the rest of my life! So how the fuck are you gonna help me?!" He yelled, they were silent. "Exactly." He scoffed as he opened the door to the dormitory's.

"Shoto wait!" Nastuo called out, the teen stopped and faced him. "I don't know what your feeling, or what's going on through your head but know this...me and Fuyumi are here for you, if you need anyone to talk to-" Before he could finish, Shoto cut him off "Goodbye...Fuyumi...Nastuo" He walked in and closed the door leaving Nastuo and Fuyumi behind. They both looked at each other before walking towards the car and getting in. 

"I'm worried for him"

"Me too"

—

The teen slammed the door shut out of frustration as he entered his room, he tossed his bag near the door and made his way towards the bathroom. He noted the bandages around his arms as he took off his hoodie "Why?" He muttered.

Why do I bother living?!

Just let me die already!

The teen opened the sink cabinet and rummaged through the stuff.

I've already decided.

Shoto grabbed a razor blade and walked over to his futon.

Come on...do it, you'll be okay...it'll be over quickly, hopefully.

He brought the blade closer to his wrist.

"Become a hero honey, for you and me"

"Damn it!" Shoto threw the blade across the room.

Why...why can't I do it?! I've already decided!

Shoto remembered the promise he swore to his mother, the promise to become a hero. The teen didn't want to live anymore though, he wanted to die. Shoto was confused on why he couldn't bring himself to do it, was it the pain? Or just fear? The teen stood up from his futon and headed towards the bathroom.

I don't wanna live anymore, what's the point in me living? Why couldn't I do it? He stared across the room at the blade before turning back.

I really am pathetic.

To be continued...

Sorry this took long, I've been dealing with writers block and school isn't helping ya know! I'll try to update more...if I'm not lazy that is!

Peace out! ✌🏻