Part 40- No control of feelings

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Ruby's POV

It was the morning after having one of the worst night sleeps of my life. All I could think about was how guilty I felt about the whole James kissing me situation. I never thought in a million years that he liked me like that, more than a friend. I only ever saw James as a friend, and that was how it was always going to stay.

I stayed in my bedroom for hours on end, not wanting to face the world. As I was in the middle of reading my book, there was a knock on my bedroom door.

"Yeah?" I asked.

The door opened and Zoe walked in.

"Hi" she said, smiling. "Alfie and I were in the area so we decided to pop in"

"Hi" I said, not being able to push out a smile.

Zoe sat on my bed next to me.

"Joe said you've kept yourself in your room for hours" she said. "He was starting to get worried but he didn't want to get in the way"

I sighed and looked down.

"Ruby, if something's wrong you can tell me" she said. "I'd only ever tell anyone if your life was at risk"

I decided to just tell Zoe. What I was going to tell her wasn't risking my life, so she wouldn't tell anyone.

"Um, promise you won't tell Joe?" I asked. "Don't worry, it's nothing life threatening"

"Ok" she said. "I won't"

I took a deep breath.

"James kissed me" I sighed.

"James?" Zoe questioned. "As in James White, Oli White's little brother?"

"Yeah" I said shyly.

"Oooo!" Zoe squealed, smirking. "Love birds"

"No" I said quickly.

Zoe looked at me confused.

"I don't see him like that" I sighed.

"Aww sweetie, that's ok" she smiled.

I decided not to tell her about not feeling anything about boys; I didn't even know how I felt to be honest.

How was I not in control of my own feelings?

End of part 40

A/N:

Hi guys. Well, until next time!

Rachel x

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