Polysanders

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Ok so Polysanders/LAMP just really isn't everyone's cup of tea, I know, so feel free to skip right over this chapter. But it will probably be heavily Prinxiety and Logicality still, because I don't know how to write anything else.
Note- This barely even qualifies as Polysanders but it's kinda funny and cute I guess. I might write actual Polysanders if I ever have ideas that don't sound like crack fics
They're watching John Mulaney because he's a gay icon and yes they would rather watch Disney but I know John Mulaney specials by heart okay so it's easier to write

Roman's POV
Okay, so we're not supposed to summon each other because it's "rude," but I think this was important enough. I called everyone to the living room. No one looked too upset, which is good.

"Hello! You're probably wondering why I've called you all here, especially so close to sunset." I paused. Everyone just looked awkward. "No? No one's wondering?" (Hello. I'm Chip Mulaney. I'm your father.)

"I tend to think that you just want attention," Virgil said sarcastically. I pouted.

"Well, kinda. But I have a proposition!" I stopped. I am built for drama, but damned if I don't know my comedic timing.

"Well?" Logan asked after a solid twenty seconds of silence.

"Sleepover!" I cheered, overlapping Logan's remark. "Everyone gather blankets and pillows and we will make a giant pit of comfort and watch movies!" Patton's face lit up like a Christmas Tree, while Virgil and Roman exchanged looks of pure terror. (Oh, he's not gonna shoot free throws, is he?)

"No, thanks, I like my room. It's covered in spiders and shadows and beds I get to sleep in alone," Virgil said, clearly trying to sound proud about something so sad.

"Yeah, this ain't it, chief." Logan quickly pulled out a flash card to support his claim.

"Come on, we can all cuddle and watch John Mulaney and it'll be fun!" Patton cheered, clearly agreeing with me. (We'd be watching Saved By the Bell, we'd be having a great old time.) Virgil and Logan sighed and rolled their eyes in sync.

"Fine," they both said. (Like it was something we just wanted really badly and the government just went *sigh* fine. Yknow?) We all summoned a mass of blankets and such, tossing them around into a sort of mat.
I laid towards one side, Logan found space in the middle, Virgil laid his head and legs across me and Logan respectively, and Patton laid right up against Logan's side.

Once everyone was comfortable, I grabbed the remote. I navigated towards Kid Gorgeous on Netflix, which is the best special by far.

Needless to say, none of us could stop laughing or breathlessly quoting punchlines through the whole thing. We all wheezed as Virgil shot up to mimic the "Street Smarts!" position, bracing himself as he half-squatted.

"Engraved, question mark?"

"My wife is a bitch and I like her so much." It's important to note that immediately after, I said "Two of my boyfriends are bitches and I like them so much," which was met by a wave of laughter and Patton pleading to be the one that wasn't a bitch. Of course he was not a bitch, he's the most wholesome person on the planet.

"Was there ever even a ghost, or was it just me that you saw?" We all practically cried, followed by Logan saying "When any of us see Virgil in the hallway in the middle of the night."

Throughout the whole thing, Patton never swore once, which was a challenge, but hell, he still made everything work. Normally, "I will stomp you to death with my hooves, I'm so fuckin crazy" just wouldn't have the same effect without the F word, but Patton managed. It was amazing.

After the special ended, our stomachs all hurt from laughing so hard. We considered putting on another special, but we knew that none of us would be able to stay awake through that with all the exercise we were getting from doubling over with laughter.

"Should we just put on some TV while we fall asleep?" Patton suggested.

"Yeah sure," Virgil said, "but what do we watch?"

"Do we have any other choice than Queer Eye, legally?" I asked. No one could think of an argument, so I put on season 2 episode 1. (Note: I'm following the course of events from night two of my weird Hell party so be thankful that I skipped the Bee Movie interlude)

During the episode, we all shifted to be more comfortable so we could actually sleep. Virgil eventually laid down wedged in between me and Logan, and I wasn't complaining. Patton wrapped around Logan and we all fell asleep that way before the episode even ended.

Ok so I probably could have made this so much better but it's only 11pm and I still have like two other oneshots in progress so I should either work on those or sleep... it's probably gonna be sleep bc the in 20BiTeen not only do we dress more slutty and make more bold fashion decisions for Freddie we also take care of ourselves uwu

Cheers, queers 💖💜💙

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