Boy Journal✔

9

You looked at him from across the table. You both haven't talked since Jen left.

Jin had already made dinner, along with Hoseok's help, and you decided to sit next to Jungkook.

Yoongi was also looking back at you, studying your features, making sure you weren't angry.

You caught him and your eyes locked together. You still couldn't tell if you were upset at him, or glad he stopped Jen from blaming you even more.

You bit your lip and looked down, eating your food slowly. The dinner was steak and potatoes, but the steak was hard to chew.

You didn't really steak that much, but what Jin made, everyone had to eat or there would be no dinner for you.

Yoongi opened his mouth to talk to you, but Jungkook did it for him.

"Do you want me to cut it smaller so it's easier, Y/n?" He asked.

You nodded and set your fork down. He put his arm across you to reach the food. He held the knife and fork and sliced it into smaller pieces. You held onto his arm so you didn't fall back in the chair.

Yoongi stared at you both. He didn't like how you held Jungkook's arm. Especially since it was his bicep.

Jungkook moved so it was more comfortable for the both of you. He stood behind you, leaning onto your back a bit as he looked at the plate, his arms on either side of you.

Yoongi disapproved and looked away, not liking the scene.

You smiled once he was finished. "Thank you, Kookie."

He smiled back and set the fork and knife down, earning himself a peck on the cheek.

You ate your steak easier now, and then moved onto the potatoes.

"Y/n. I nee-" Yoongi's small voice was interupted by Hoseok's loud one.

"Y/n, do you like the potatoes? I made them myself!"

You nodded. "They are delicious!"

You turned to Yoongi. "What were you going to say?"

He sighed and shook his head, putting his plate in the sink and wobbling upstairs.

You furrowed your brows and did the same, stepping into his room.

"What's wrong?" You asked, pulling at his sleeve.

He waved you off, in a bit of rude way, and laid on his bed.

"Are you mad?"

"Why would I be mad?" You stared at him, confused.

"Because I pushed Jen out of the house and yelled at her. And I yelled at you."

He looked into your eyes in the softest way you have ever seen.

You slid into his bed next to him and wrapped your arms around his waist.

"I'm not mad, Yoongs. I swear."

He looked down at you and smiled, turning on the T.V. and playing a piano music on a file he had on it.

You smiled as you listened, loving the sound.

"Hm... Who made this?"

He took his shirt off, getting comfortable for bed, and grinned proudly.

"I did."

You looked up at him, seeing his grin.

"It's beautiful."

He looked back down at you. "You think so?"

You nodded. "What's it called?"

"I haven't named it yet."

"Are there lyrics to it?" You asked.

"U-uh yeah. Joon helped me."

You smiled and sat up. "Can I hear them?"

He blushed and shook his head. You frowned and slumped down.

He looked at you and sighed, grabbing sheet music from inside his bed side drawer.

You watched him and smiled, zooming to him. You laid onto his chest, staring at the lyrics.

He blushed and twirled your hair.

"Sing them," you commanded.

"N-no..."

"Please?" You shut off the T.V.

He sighed and began singing the familiar sound from the piano piece.

You listened to him. As the verse began to come in.

"A repeating seesaw, seesaw game.
At this point I just became sick, sick of it.
A repeating seesaw, seesaw game.
We both became tired of it and we are now miserable."

His voice flowed through your ears as if it were water. So smooth and gentle. You became a bit emotional, the words hitting you like a train wreck. It reminded you too much of your past relationship.

"Was the pretty arguments the start of it all?
The moment I became heavier than you. Because from the very beginning, parallels never existed.
Did we try to be equal in spite of our greed?"

You closed your eyes as his words were getting stronger. You remembered being at the hill with your ex. All the times you guys fought before because of pettiness. Even times you fought because of Yoongi. You pushing and shoving each other as you fought.

"It was love,
and if this is the epitome of the definition of love,
is there a reason to continue to repeat? We're both tired of it.
And it seems like we both have the same card at hand.
If it's that way, then well..."

You let your tears drop down your cheeks. They landed softly onto Yoongi's chest and he looked down at you. He let his hands rub from the top of your head down to your back in a comforting way. He knew why you were so emotional, and so he kept going.

"All right, this repeating seesaw game.
Now I finally try to end this.
All right, I'm sick of this seesaw game.
Someone has to get off from here, although we can't."

You sobbed softly, cuddling closer to Yoongi. He held you closer, letting you let it out. He knew how hard it is when you had your heart broken.

"Let's not eye each other and see who will get off or not.
Let's not drag this just by the way you are feeling.
Let's try to end this, and decide who will get off or not.
This repeating seesaw game.

Let's stop now."

He stopped singing there, setting the sheet music down and setting you on his lap. He held you as you sobbed into his chest.

"Yoongi..."

"Sh..."

"No, Y-yoongi."

"What is it, Sweetie?" He asked.

"Name it Seesaw."

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i wish i had more readers :(