Blood Stains and Burn Marks

Chapter 11

"You need to go see the nurse. Now." I look down and on his right side is a patch of red spots. Panic sets in my body. It looks all too familiar. I place my hand to his forward. It's hot to the touch. His fever must be so high.

"No no. I'm fine." He brushes off my touch. I look at his face. Once rosy cheeks, now pale. His eyes once vibrate now losing their shine. His breaths now shallow and uneven.

"No you're not. Tate if you soon don't get those burn and cuts treated they're going to get infected."

"I highly doubt that." He smirks.

"I'm serious here Tate. For godsakes just go get help."

"I'll be fine. I know how to keep burns from getting infected." He looks down at his arms. Bruised and beaten. Not a single inch of skin left unscarred.

"And what about all the gashes and cuts?"

"That's why I have you." He pops me on the nose as if this were a thing I should have already thought about. I look down at my own scars. Mangled and disoriented. Scarred words on my arms read 'fat, ugly, die'. Others are just miscellaneous lines. No true meaning behind them expect for relief and sorrow. "Are you okay?" He grabs my hand and intertwines it with his own.

"It's just...I don't want to know how to keep cuts uninfected. I don't want to know how to do that. And I don't want to keep yours from getting infected either..."

"What?" There's a hint of hurt in his voice. It's not like he thinks it is.

"I mean...if something happened to you...I'd...I'd never be able to forgive myself." A sigh escape his lips and he lets go of my hand.

"P-please..."

"No Tate...I'm not risking your life...you need a nurse."

"But I don't want a goddamn nurse!" His fists begin to hit the wood above us. Much like my own several weeks earlier. The anger bottle up inside of him scares me beyond belief.

"Tate, shhh, it's okay." I wrap my arms around him until eventually he stops. As he cries he winces. Maybe from the pain of me being on top of him. Maybe from the whole thing. And maybe because his demons are killing him inside too.

After hours of crying, and me trying to sooth a worked up Tate, he finally speaks.

"Okay."

"Okay what?" I arise from his chest. His face more red than I have ever seen it before. He looks so helpless. So innocent.

"I'll...I'll get help..." A rush of pure happiness explodes in my body.

"Thank you thank you thank you." I say as I bring him into a kiss. A kiss that lasts just a little too long. But neither of us pull away.

***

The nurse gives us a questioning look but no words escape her lips. She's easily in her late 30's and the scars her body bares show that she was once just like us. I wonder if she has any kids. I wonder what they think of the marks their mother carries. I wonder if they think it's okay to portray the same marks on themselves. It's surprising that she doesn't do a better job of covering them up.

That's probably my biggest fear. Having children and them seeing my scars, thinking that it's okay. I think it'd possibly break my heart if I caught them drawing pretty pictures upon their thighs.

"It's a good thing you came here when you did Tate...or else..."

"Or else what?" I speak. I know what she's going to say. I saw it as we lied in bed just several hours earlier.

"He would have died...he has blood poisoning." I look up to a teary eyed Tate. He grabs my hand and pulls it tight to his lips. I feel his cool lips against my warm hands, and I feel tears soak my hand. I knew it...God I knew... "Alright Tate. Looks like you're okay to go back to your room. I'd advise you to take a few days off. Just relax." He nods. "Now I'm going to give them these antibiotics to add to your other pills, so make sure you take them." And with that we're out the door. He leans on me for support as he hops down the hallway.

"You knew..." I don't even look up because I instantly know what he's talking about. "You knew, and that's why you wanted me to go to the nurse...isn't it?" I just keep walking. He pulls me back. "Devena look at me." I turn around.

"Yes Tate. I knew."

"How?"

"I don't want to talk about it..."

"You just saved my life, how could you not want to talk about it?" I look down once again. The past is the past for a reason. And I'd rather not remember a thing. "Babe please?" I look up as a weird expression fills my face.

"Babe?" His eyes instantly divert to the floor. His cheeks rosy once again.

"I just...uh...I wanted to try something different...I understand though if it's too much..." I tilt his head back up and bring his face close to mine.

"No, I love it." I say smiling as I place a soft kiss to his sinster lips. He kisses me back. People give us weird looks as they pass but he doesn't care. And for once in my entire life, neither do I.