Blood Stains and Burn Marks

Chapter 25

*6 months later*

My stomach has since grown from that night. Now almost the size of a rather large beach ball. I constantly feel the baby kick inside of me. The doctor says it's a baby girl. Tate believes she'll be a spitting image of me. I hope to god she's not. We've thought about names for awhile now, not quite sticking to one without finding another to replace it shortly after. My favourite is Peyton though. It means royal. I'm naming her this in attempt to show her that regardless of how she feels about herself, she's still a princess to me and everyone else who surrounds her.
Most nights I fall asleep not long after Tate does. His soft breathes still seem to be my greatest weakness. But tonight it seems not even those can let my tired eyes shut. The baby kicks extremely hard inside of me. Pain runs up my spine. I feel the sweat pour off my forehead covering the sheets around me. I try laying on my side, then my back, and then my side again. Nothing is working. The pain starts to become unbearable. I hadn't realized I had been screaming until Tate awakes suddenly beside me and frantically demands what wrong.
"Devena! Are you okay!? Is it the baby!?" All of a sudden I fell a liquid run down my legs. I instantly know what it is. It doesn't take endless piles of parenting books to know that my water just broke. My heart starts to beat faster. I try to remain calm for Tate's sake.
"The baby's coming and my water just broke."
"Oh my god!" He quickly keeps up throwing on a pair of pants and a t-shirt and assists me up. We walk to the elevator and press the button for the main floor. It feels like ages until we reach the bottom.
Tate half carries me, half drags me through the lobby and into the front seat of his car. He books it to the other side frantically fumbling to put the keys in the ignition. I push the seat back, hoping that if I slow my heart rate down it'll slow the baby down too. I don't think there's one red light Tate doesn't goes though.

*****

It doesn't take long until I'm all prepped. From the gown to the epidural needle button, that I can push whenever I please. The doctors say I'm about 1/2 dilated and it'll be just a matter of time until she's ready to come out. I've honestly never have been so scared of anything in my life. Tate rubs my hands as a way to calm me down but nothing can compare to the way I feel right now. A wave of emotions fill me and I don't quite know how to take it.
I want to be everything for this child that my parents never were. I want to show her the beauty of life, and why she should want to live in it. Not the heart break of it and why she should leave it. I understand now why my mother always looked at everything like it was the most beautifulest thing she had ever lied her eyes on, she did it for me and my sister. She wanted to show us that even though the world looks scary, even though there's so much hurt and pain, there's still beauty. You just have to know where to find it. I know I have to change for her. I know I need to be strong and start looking for that beauty because she needs to know that's it's out there. Even if it takes her her whole life she needs to know.
The pains in my back have increased immensity over the past few hours. I push the button but either it's run out or I'm in so much pain that not even it can mask the agony.
"Well Ms.Winters, how are you feeling?"
"I've felt better." The doctor grins.
"I'm definitely sure you have. It's quite tiring carrying these little guys for 9 months then spending so many hours in labor. I definitely look up to you." He smiles at me and for once it feels so nice to have someone say that and generally mean it. It feels so nice to know that I actually mean something to someone. "Where's the proud daddy anyway?"
"Oh he's just out in the hallway getting some sleep. I'm sure he'll be in here as soon as he wake up." He nods his head and smiles.
"Well it appears you're almost fully dilated." Just as the words escape his lips a blood curling scream comes from the hallway, followed by a gun shot. The voice sounds all too familiar. I know instantly who's it is. It's Tate's.