I Want More {COMPLETED}

Chapter 34

I rested my head on hers, wrapping my arms around her neck.

When I said I felt worthless, that's really what I felt. The doctor said that I was healthy, that I could keep doing what I was doing and I lost the baby anyway.

I never thought I would lose the baby or any baby for that matter but I did and I failed my fiance. I failed my family altogether.

Dinah Jane Hansen

"Sit down boy." Nika said to Kordei.

He sat down as soon as she said it and she picked Chas up, wiping his mouth.

We had just fed all of them and Heaven was actually being good for once. She wasn't crying and she was already fed, she's sleeping now.

"Dinah, come here." She called for me.

I walked up behind her and kissed her cheek then Chas'. "Yes?"

"Is Heaven okay?"

"Yes, she's sleeping." I said.

Kordei, of course, was missing Bey but I don't know the next time he will see her. Bey was more focused on Mani than anything, they'd just lost a baby. That just makes me so much more afraid of everything.

"Good, I don't want her to start crying again." She said.

"She's going to start crying at 3 in the morning, I got it though, you had her last night." I said and she nodded, patting Chas' back. "Do you think my best friend is okay?"

"No, I don't but she will be. She'll be okay, I promise."

"What can I do though?" I asked.

"You can keep watching the babies like they asked and let them get through it by themselves. They'll be fine and they'll ask for more help if they need it."

My immediate thought was 'will they?'

I know Beyonce and Normani and though they are this grinding ass power couple, they don't know how to ask for help but I trusted them right now. I don't want to smother them.

I sat down on the couch and watched TV with Kordei, he instantly crawled into my lap, laying his head on my chest.

"You okay baby boy?" I asked him.

He nodded his head and continued to look at the TV, sucking his thumb. I pulled his thumb out of his mouth, knowing that Bey doesn't let him. He think he slick.

He whined and looked up at me, his hair all in his face.

"Somebody gon' do your hair before you leave." I said, puffing up his little afro.

"Uh uh!" He yelled and I popped him.

"If you wake your sister up, we gon' have a problem."

•••

"Sit down little boys." I patted Heaven's back while the boys ran to the dining room.

This is why I don't want boys or tomboys, they're always running and they're so heavy-footed. They're not bad but they're assholes just like Beyonce.

Luckily, Heaven wasn't crying this morning and I was sort of surprised, she's such a cry baby, I would've thought she'd already be crying.

"Baby, open the door for Bey and Mani!" Nika yelled.

I went to the door and opened the door for them. Instantly, Beyonce took Heaven from me and kissed her cheeks.