Saving Snape

1. Rita Skeeter is a ninja spy lady

(Side pic is the beloved Isabelle Lily Morgan)

The car we are riding in pulls over at the side of the road and I glance over at Hazel, my best friend, before stepping out into the bright sunlight. We are absolute hardcore Potterheads who have just won the chance to meet Queen Rowling herself. She has arranged for us to meet at the hotel she finished writing Deathly Hallows in. We're even going to stay in the room overnight! We will be able to sit at the desk that concluded our favourite series, along with everything else in the room. 

I think back to our week so far. We went to London a few days ago to see platform 9 3/4. There were a lot of people there, but the only one I remember is the ginger girl with the Scottish accent. She looked like she was being excluded from something, but was happy to... I don't even know. She looked happy, but back then I could tell things were complicated in her life. I'm quite observant. Then I remember what happened after we met her. She was called back by her brother and that was the last of it, and a few minutes after, we decided we should head back to our hotel and get some sleep. It was already quite late.

And then we left in the morning, to have a look at everything else London had to offer. The day at the platform was our first day out of the plane, so this was our first taste of Britain. It was great. Yesterday we got ushered into this car and we drove here, to Edinburgh.

We apprehensively step inside the hotel and she is waiting in the lobby, smiling.

"Hi!" I say nervously. I mean this is the real deal standing right before me. "I'm Isabelle."

She smiles. "Hello Isabelle. Are you Hazel?" She turns to Hazel and, being the potato she is, Hazel can only nod. I have to admit though, talking to the person who basically gave you something to obsess over is something that not many people can say they've done.

"Let's walk around." She suggests and we are back outside, enjoying the sunlight. I notice two people staring at us but I shrug it off. Probably just staring at Joanne Rowling who is currently walking with me.

"Umm...." I say, then decide to get straight to the point. "Can I ask you two things please? I've been dying for answers and I have to know." She nods and I continue. "Are you going to write another book? It could still have Voldemort in it. You see, in the letter Lily sent Sirius, she said they had a cat. If it was possible for Harry and Nagini to be horcruxes, couldn't the cat be the same? Let's say it didn't leave the house for some reason, until after it became a horcrux."

She nods slowly. "You're saying that Voldemort could have lived on... And Harry would need to fight him again? Let's say the cat did stay, who would have been killed? Nagini was made from James, if I recall correctly. Harry was made from Lily's death. There wasn't anyone else to be killed so the cat would have lived on as normal. I could do Harry's kids as well... I'm not saying I will, but I won't say that I won't do it either."

"Also..." I ask again. "Let's say everything was real. You wouldn't have really made everything up. You would be a witch. Rita Skeeter to be exact." Joanne nods, beckoning for me to continue. "Rita fled to the muggle world, wanting to make some profit from Harry's story. She could have got that idea on the train away from Hogwarts after the battle was over. Maybe... Used a disillusionment charm on herself? That way no one would know it was her."

Hazel buts in. "Did Sirius have to die?"

Joanne smiles, looking amused. "You two both came up with that theory, didn't you? Actually, you two strike me as the most dedicated muggles I've ever seen. You're right about everything. Actually, you could give Hermione Weasley a run for her money. How would you like to see for yourselves what a bit of magic can do?"

This is absolutely ridiculous. I thought she would be a bit more... Sirius about this. It's not like we believe in this theory. We know it's not real...

She rummages in her handbag for a moment and produces what looks like a wand. She probably got it from Universal Studios. She waves it and I almost die of excitement. Shes not J.K. Rowling anymore, shes blonde, wearing glasses just like Rita in the movies, and clutching a crocodile skin handbag. She's not kidding about this. We were right.

Yeah, I know. This sounds like some dumb fanfiction moment right now. That's what's going through my head. Maybe Hazel's thinking the same thing. I wonder how she did that so quickly...

"Here's my time turner." She presses the familiar time travelling necklace into Hazel's hand. "I'll let you save one character each, as long as the death is faked. The books must continue as normal as possible until they drop off the kids at platform 9 3/4. Then do whatever you want. I won't put you in the books unless it's important to the events. I'm doing this because you two are the first to figure it out. Also, I can turn it for you with magic so don't worry about being here for hours and hours. Happy?" She smiles and I slowly nod. So I was right.

A theory I made up for fun was right and now I get to go to Hogwarts and meet Harry, Ginny, Ron, Hermione, Dumbledore and... Snape!

I smile as wide as humanly possible. Snape was my favourite. Sure, I hated him from the big Dumbledore incident until his death, but cried while reading about the memories. I also admired him for his bravery. I'd give anything to meet him.

We hang the chain on our necks and Joanne waves that little stick of hers. The time turner starts spinning. "I forgot to tell you girls. Muggles can do magic. Just ask Dumbledore for further explanation." Then time starts going backwards around us. I pinch myself.

"Ow!" I yelp.

"That's why you don't pinch yourself." Says Hazel, like she's talking to a small child, then she does the same as me as we wait for time to stop going wacko. "Ow..." She says, rubbing her arm.

"That's why you don't pinch yourself!" I say cheekily.

"Shut up." She lightly punches my arm and we find ourselves face to face with and old dude who looks like he was expecting us. Looks like time is back to normal... Actually, time is never anywhere near normal.

"Come with me." He says in his wise voice and we of course follow him. Is this real?

_______________

I'm rewriting this author's note because why not.

8 months after I uploaded chapter 75!!!! (new readers, you should know these chapters aren't that long and its quite easy to read)

8 months later, I've finally started editing this goddamn fanfic because honestly right now its so bad and my author's notes... *cringes* oh wow I was such a dork.

Well, I've always been a dork but you know...

Anyway, welcome new readers to this random book full of random nonsence. I actually quite like the ending. Also, don't trust me whith any characters because if I write a book with them I will kill them all and/or make them suffer :)

Yeah, I'm quite skilled at that.

Anyway, you should get back to your reading. If it's crap, then I haven't got round to editing the bad parts, because I don't even remember where they are. I'll get there eventually.

Thanks for reading!

~Ericano