Chapter 21: Saturday, 7 days until initiation

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Tris

When I wake up, the sun is already lighting the room and dazzles my sleepy eyes. I glimpse over to the boy still sleeping at my side. I take in a deep breath as memories of last night come flooding back into my mind. I can still feel his tight grip around my waist, holding me as close as possible to his trembling body while his lust built, and hear my name falling from his lips in a groan when he came.

We crossed a new line last night, and we both knew it. I'm in awe that he allowed me to see him so vulnerable. Thinking about it, that's probably the part about everything that touches me most and deepens my love for him: That he, always so guarded and intimidating in public, let all his defenses down in front of me. I feel light as a feather, appreciating his trust in me.

I lay my head on Tobias' chest, right over his heart, and listen to its steady beating. It's a lot slower than last night, calm but strong.

As he slowly wakes up, he kisses my head and I turn to look into his beautiful blue eyes. They glow in the autumn sunlight.

"Hey," he greets me, his voice still throaty from sleeping.

"Hey," I reply, smiling at him.

"I had a wonderful dream about us, although it felt too real to be just a dream," he says, returning my smile.

Oh, I like his playful side! It comes out far too rarely.

"If you tell me what it was about, maybe I can help you figure out what's real and what's not," I offer.

I swear I see him blink timidly for a second before he finds his voice again.

"Let's see. You and I ended up in my bed after having drinks at the bar. True or false?"

"True."

"We took off our shirts while we were kissing."

Tension starts to build again between us, and I swallow.

"True."

Tobias' voice is just a whisper close to my ear now, "We made me..."

He leaves the rest unspoken, but we both know what it is that he doesn't say. Its meaning lingers in the silence between his words and mine.

"Partially true. Actually, you did."

"No, I said we because I meant it. It's... never like that when I'm on my own. Not that intense," he confesses, and I wonder if he keeps hiding his face in my neck because he's blushing.

We spend more time in his bed, cuddling and kissing, until Tobias gets up to make breakfast and I take a shower in his bathroom. When I come out, dressed again in my clothes from yesterday, I make a mental note to bring a set of clothes over and store them somewhere in his wardrobe. Tobias has set the table for us, and the welcoming smell of coffee swirls through the air.

"Do you mind if I take a quick shower, too, before breakfast? It'll only be three minutes. You can start with a cup of coffee, if you like. I had one already."

"Sure," I say and peck his lips before taking a seat at his kitchen table.

I pour milk in my coffee and stir it. Since I'm Dauntless, I've come to like drinking coffee. Before, in Abnegation, I hardly drank any at all because most of the time it tasted too bitter, without any milk or sugar added.

I look up from my cup when Tobias comes out of the bathroom. He's wearing nothing but a black towel around his waist, and my gaze flies to the spot where he has tucked a corner of it under the side to keep it from falling down.

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