Burn in Water, Drown in Fire

Burn in Water, Drown in Fire ~39~ Catch Me

“What the h3ll is up with you tonight?” he asked. I didn’t answer him, but I started to hear the music change in Angel’s room. The song changed and the volume increased. Joey frowned. “What’s wrong with Angel?”

“Nothing,” I lied. He gave me a look. I didn’t want him knowing there was something wrong with Angel because he’d jump to conclusions. Over the year, he told me he was over her—probably because he’s had two other short-term girlfriends—but any time she’d walk through the living room or past his line of sight, he’d be as hooked as ever. If they talked, he’d probably be hooked forever on the single conversation.

“Tell me,” he said with a calm voice. What’s the use? If he’s pissed off, he can’t do anything.

“She and Zac went out today, even though his flight leaves in a couple of hours,” I told. His face was completely still. I was surprised. I thought he’d throw a chair or something. All he did was nod once and sit there.

“Flight for what?” he asked. I shrugged.

“College? New life? Who knows? I don’t think he’s told anyone,” I answered. That’s when he got up from the couch and left the house without a word. Whatever. He was a grown man and made his own decisions—no matter if they were good or bad. And plus, it gave me time to officially go check on Angel.

“Burn into the sky, love me, love me. Burn into the sky; if you want me. Oh by the way, by the way I found someone who gives me space, keeps me safe, makes me sane. I found someone to take your place. Now I’m safe in his arms and I decide that only he can play with fire...”

I opened the door to hearing her sing loudly to the Hilary Duff song as she jumped on the bed, dancing like no one was watching.

“Angel!” I yelled when the song was over and it was starting to change. She ran a hand through her hair and then faced me, embarrassed.

“What?” she asked, out of breath.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Nothing?” she answered. “Why? Is my music bugging you guys?”

“No…” I lied. “But what’s with the abundant amount of decibels? Aren’t you supposed to listen to quiet music when you’re sad or something?”

“Who said I was sad?” she asked, sitting down on her bed and giving me a confused and smug look.

“Didn’t Zac leave you today?” I asked, wanting to punch myself for bringing it up. This was probably a cover for her true depression and I just brought it up. WAY TO GO, DEVIN.

“Yeah…” she replied. She looked up at me, pushing her hair back again. “But that doesn’t mean I should be sad.”

“And why’s that?” I asked. She was being so confusing.

“Cuz I realized what it felt like to be happy with him,” she expressed, making gestures.

“You’ve been drinking, haven’t you?” I guessed as a joke.

“Just a little bit,” she admitted. “But…it has nothing to do with the fact that I’m happy knowing that I was with him for at least today…”

“You were always with him,” I started. “It just now occurred to you with the romance involved.”

“I’m glad I see it that way now,” she said. “Cuz I realize how it is to be happy and open and…in love. It’s the best feeling in the world knowing that—”

“Even though he’s leaving and you won’t know when he’ll see you again?” I asked. Now I was just wondering if I was wanting her to get sad. Maybe it’d justify me for telling—oh sh!t. I told Joey. In her moment of silence, I turned around and tried to call Joey. Angel wasn’t sad at all. He was going to think she was and it was all my fault. I knew where he was going, but not what he’d do. All I knew was that he’d get into trouble and it’d be my fault just like everything else.

(Zac’s POV)

I now hated myself.

When we kissed, I could instantly tell that she finally accepted loving me back, but why didn’t she say it? Why didn’t I?

I don’t know. I just drove off, thinking that now that I had probably hurt her now more than ever. I should’ve never led her on for the day because she was more attached than I thought she’d be. And what did I have to say for it? Have fun your senior year and invite me to your graduation from Rhode Island University. Ugh. I was such an idiot.

And when I exited my house after swiftly grabbing my luggage without my sisters noticing I was there, I saw someone who would, of course, prove my idiocy far more than deserved.