Thirty Two

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The day that I fear most has finally comes. The day that I've forget the most precious person in my life. It's here.

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He stands by the door of the room. He looked at my direction, his eyes are wide open. He was speechless by what I've said.

"Hana-ah, I'm here!" He entered my room, bringing what it seems like containers of food in a bag. I looked towards his direction, my memories can't seem to recognize his face, but it's hurts in my chest. It was thumping loud, like it was in pain. "Can I know who you are?" I asked and his smile faded away immediately. My one question has made his smile to disappeared and replaced by a shocked and pained expression.

He is still standing by the door, he didn't even moves a single muscle. I don't remember who he is. No matter how hard I try to dig deep into my memory, but I can't seem to remember him. But, seeing his figure, his face and his voice, make my heart hurts. I feel as if my heart is torn apart by a force that I don't know. "I'm.. your friend." He said.

I nodded my head but something is off, but I could not grasp the point.

I watched him as he peeled some of the mandarins and handed it to me. "Why are you peeling it for me and not yourself instead?" I asked.

"Because I'm your friend." He answered.

"But you've been peeling it for a while now and you haven't even eat one," holding the mandarins, I gave him one and put in his hand. "Here, have some." I smile. Somehow, his eyes portrayed endless sadness, like a long tunnel that has no end. "Can I ask you something?" He asked, and I nodded. "Do you know your name?" He asked.

His question makes me think. Who am I? I feel like I know myself but then, suddenly it vanished just like that. I shake my head slowly and heave a sigh. "No idea, I can't remember anything--"

"Hana."

"What?" I looked at him, for spouting a name out of the blue. "Your name, Hana." He said, not even sparing me a look. Out of the blue, I cried upon hearing that name. Tears dropped one by one on the white bedsheet of the hospital's bed. What is it that I'm feeling? I thought to myself and question my emotions over and over.

Is it because of that name?

But somehow, somewhere deep inside my heart tells me that the voice makes things look nostalgic. I stare at him who's still peeling the mandarin. "Who are you? What's your name?"

He looked up at me upon hearing the questions that I threw at him. "Just a friend of yours," He replied. "Baekhyun." He added afterwards.

Then my heart feels pain upon hearing that name, even without knowing any reason. Why is it hurts so much that I feel I couldn't breath? Tears are not stopping any time soon. My head is asking him to tell me the truth, what's behind those words if there's one. What cause me to have heartache just hearing upon a mere name of my friend? Upon hearing the name that he said belong to me.

But my mouth feels like it is seal by a great force, only letting me ask that question in my head. He spent most of his time in my room, accompanying me. Some quiet time, mandarins and some drink in a hospital's room. Strange enough that I don't want to see him leave when he cleared the mandarins' peeled skin and threw it into a average sized plastic bag.

"I'll visit you again tomorrow." He smile, that sad smile carved on his face. I stare at his facial features, pale white and flawless skin, and he has a sad eyes and smile. Who is this man that is able to makes me feel pain inside?

He stare at me before slowly leaning in and kiss my head, too long for being just a friend. "Baekhyun?" I called out. "I'll go now. See you tomorrow." He patted my head before really leave the room. My hand was unconsciously reaching towards him but I was a bit late and he left, leaving none but his footsteps.

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